Don't you hate it when....

[u/Icy_Answer2513]

Someone starts a conversation with you and you engage with them, only for them to edge away saying things like "I won't keep you".."I'll let you get on"....

Making you feel like you are taking their time and preventing them from getting on with something.

Don't come and start a conversation with me!

[u/randomperson87692]

those phrases are typically used as a polite way to let you escape conversation in case you’re busy or don’t want to talk. or as a polite way to indicate they only wanted a quick conversation.

[u/Icy_Answer2513 → u/randomperson87692]

I felt like it was because they thought I w as s never going to stop talking.

But they kept on with leading questions...

[u/snow-mammal]

I do this because I feel like I’m wasting their time and want to give them an excuse to leave (since I am really bad at telling when somebody is annoyed at me for talking to them)

[u/Icy_Answer2513 → u/snow-mammal]

Yep, I tend to let people direct a conversation.

I just felt like they asked me a series of questions and told me other things then were kind of making me feel like I spoke too much.

Happens often to me!

[u/snow-mammal → u/Icy_Answer2513]

Haha fair, but I would assume people say it to avoid being rude, not because they think you’re talking too much

[u/caffelion]

I usually use that as my way of letting the other person end the conversation. I used to be a chatterbox, and was called “insensitive to people’s time.” At the same time, after quieting down or “shutting down” because of it, I was called “too quiet” or “disengaged.” So I give the other person the chance to end the conversation, and they usually bite, but it is a polite way of engaging and exiting conversations, ESPECIALLY in the corporate world (unfortunately, this is how the neurotypical world operates i.e. formalities, pleasantries, etc.). There are times the other person wants to continue the conversation, but, truthfully? I say that because the dopamine rush of the conversation is gone and I’m no longer stimulated and I actually REALLY want to stop talking now, so that’s my way of putting my foot out the door.

[u/Icy_Answer2513 → u/caffelion]

Well, interestingly in this particular situation, they are autistic and possibly ADHD also - as am I.

We both know this also.

I think next time I see this person, I will say, look my friend, we both like to talk. If I am talking too much and you need to go - just tell me. Easy.

Unfortunately, this isn't just with people ci can be open with.

[u/caffelion → u/Icy_Answer2513]

Oh, trust, I’ve had those too. However, it helps tremendously to be on the same page.

[u/Icy_Answer2513 → u/caffelion]

Actually, they are the first person I outed my neurodivergence to and it was only a few days ago.

It helped that they told me about their partner being auDHD though.

Felt v low stakes in the scheme of things.

[u/bsods]

I actually love when people do this because it lets me escape conversation in a fluid and natural way. I'm very introverted so 90 percent of the time I don't want to be having a conversation anyway (and that's why I spend a lot of time alone/at home). I just think it's nice.