r/MMFB • u/Prudent_Wrangler_800 • 7d ago
I feel like nothing has been going right in life
I know I'm probably just being a hormonal teenager but I'm spiraling. I've been crying for the past hour and idk how to stop. I lost my passion in arts and sports, when I tried to be valedictorian this school year I only came out second, every competition I've joined I've came out as second place. I don't need a congratulations, I know it's only pity. Pity because I quite literally had several mental breakdowns about it. I thought I just went numb but now its 10pm and I'm just sobbing again. I really wanna kill myself because I feel like I can't accomplish anything. I'm not pretty, I'm not smart, I don't have any talents or passions.. everyone tells me it's ok but it's not. I put my effort into this and then, someone does better than me. Someone always does. It's like my life wants me to be humbled every single time I believe in myself. And it's working. I'm so close to kicking the chair or taking a whole bottle of pills. Noone ever cared for me. Not my parents. Not my "friends". Noone.
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u/tarltontarlton 7d ago
Really sorry what you're going through. This sounds awful and so painful. I know what it can be like to put your heart and soul into something and still come up short. The more you want it, the more it hurts when it doesn't happen.
But I'd suggest you don't do anything you can't undo.
You are much more powerful and much more capable than you even know. What you know about yourself, and your potential, right now is like 3% of what there is. Take it one day at a time, do your best and things so good that you can't even imagine them right now will happen to you.
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u/Confident_Solid_4202 6d ago
I'm really sorry you're feeling this way. It sounds like you're dealing with so much pain and frustration, and it’s completely understandable that you feel overwhelmed. Trying so hard and feeling like you always come up short—it’s exhausting and heartbreaking. But your pain is real, and it deserves to be heard.
It’s okay to feel like things aren’t going right. It’s okay to cry and to be angry and frustrated. It’s okay to feel like things aren’t fair, because sometimes they aren’t. You’ve been pushing yourself so hard, and when you care so deeply about something and it doesn’t work out the way you hoped, it feels crushing.
But the fact that you care so much, that you’re trying so hard—it shows how strong you are. It shows you have a passion and dedication most people can’t even dream of. And even if right now it feels like all that effort is going nowhere, it’s not wasted. It’s building you up in ways you can’t see yet.
You mentioned that you feel like no one cares about you, but I care about you. And there are people out there who care about you, even if it feels impossible to believe right now. You are not alone in this, and your life is so much more than these moments of pain.
Would you be willing to talk to someone about how you're feeling? It could be a trusted adult, a counselor, or a mental health professional. There’s nothing weak or wrong about asking for help when you’re hurting. And you deserve support and kindness, especially from yourself.
If you’re feeling like you might hurt yourself, please try reaching out to a crisis hotline or a mental health professional. In the U.S., you can text or call 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, and they’re there to help you 24/7. If you're outside the U.S., there are similar services available worldwide.
And if you want to talk more here, I'm here to listen. Your thoughts, your feelings, all of it matters. And I want you to stay.
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u/Prudent_Wrangler_800 7d ago
my only goal in life to take hardcore drugs and that's it. Idk if I'm gonna make it to the age of 18 but goddamnit I don't think I wanna try.