r/MadeMeSmile • u/bendubberley_ • 14h ago
Wholesome Moments This woman’s mother suffers from Alzheimer’s. For the first time in years, she recognised her daughter, looked into her eyes and told her she loves her.
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u/arrakis2020 14h ago
I miss you, mom. Lost you twice. First time when Alzheimer's took you and the second time after 2 years, when your body gave up. The disease with two deaths.
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u/strawberrycupcock 14h ago
I'm so sorry. Sending hugs. Its an awful disease.
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u/arrakis2020 20m ago
Thank you. I miss her laugh the most. We used to spend hours making each other laugh about silly things. 😊
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u/VideoNecessary3093 12h ago
My heart goes out to you. May your good memories overtake the hard ones.
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u/Fuck_Ppl_Putng_U_Dwn 7h ago
For the mom's out there who are with us and for those still looking over us 🥰♥️🌈🌞
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u/EmperorMittens 6h ago
Have you heard of Say My Name by Within Temptation? It's way on the mark of expressing this loss.
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u/korangesandiego 5h ago
Isn’t this the truth about it? The disease with two deaths. My mom had it too. Sending healing vibes your way.
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u/S0k0n0mi 1h ago
I cant imagine a hell worse than what you had to go through. It truly is my biggest fear.
I'm so sorry.
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u/MyLastHopeReddit 14h ago
God, this is really heartbreaking.
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u/Pjsandwich24 14h ago
It's bitter sweet for sure. She had seconds of lucidity. So many questions and concerns probably raced through her mind. Her instantly choosing to say I love you is so terribly sweet she probably had some understanding that she'd fade out quick too.
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u/wonder-winter-89 12h ago
These moments come and go with my dad.
Most days he’s just kinda him haw and doesn’t make much sense or rational thought. He’s forgotten me a few times but there’s only been one moment where I felt like he didn’t actually know who I was for a long time and that was fleeting. He forgets my name, but he still knows I’m someone important to him.
Since his major decline over a year ago, there’s been two moments where he broke through and was crystal clear for a few moments.
He cried and apologized to me both times and said it shouldn’t be like this and that he was sorry for being a burden to me. I just kept telling him I loved him and it was okay, not a burden. He took care of me so it’s my turn.
It’s heartbreaking, I hate this disease.
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u/morbid_n_creepifying 9h ago
My grandfather had a stroke and it affected his memory (he forgot who we all were) and my grandmother had dementia. I'm actually incredibly grateful that we have MAID in Canada because I can't handle the thought of being that person to someone else.
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u/Patrickfromamboy 3h ago
My mom had a new heart valve installed so she could get hip replacements the procedure triggered it. It just started and she drove to the store and bank and came home and forgot her keys and phone and couldn’t get in her house or call anyone and fell down while trying to find a way back inside and died of hypothermia after crawling around in the grass for several hours.
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u/wonder-winter-89 2h ago
I am so sorry that you went through that with your mom. I couldn’t even imagine.
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u/Apprehensive_Put_321 13h ago
My grandfather had lui body dementia. The most heart breaking part was when he had moments of lucidity and looked at me and said "i know im not right"
He lasted 4 years in full time care. It was torrment for my grandmother
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u/Sheena-ni-gans 11h ago
My great grandfather had Lewy body dementia too. Unfortunately he passed when my mom was young so I never met him. My grandma says it was the worst to see him deteriorate like that. He was such a sweet, kind man 🩷
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u/Apprehensive_Put_321 10h ago
It really is a bizarre thing to watch. He was probably the funniest man I've ever met and even when he deteriorated you could still tell when he was joking around even though he couldn't speak
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u/RattieMattie 10h ago
My grandmother and her sister both died from Lewy Body dementia and my dad has Parkinsons and he and I talked just this last weekend about how scared we both are of getting dementia. My risk is higher because of his mom and aunt and while he's doing alright there a big risk of developing dementia with Parkinsons. We both have brain fog issues and constantly struggle to find words (I have chronic illnesses) and there's something surreal about being able to COMPARE SYMPTOMS with your 77 year old father. Like. Wtf man.
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u/virtuallyaway 9h ago
Yeah my uncle, aunt and folks just threw their parents into an old folks home when they got dementia and it’s absolutely fucked how in the west we just fucking dispose of our parents instead of taking care of them.
Broke my fucking heart to have think that they “come back” from time to time and they’re all alone and NOT in their home and in some strange place. Maybe for a moment or longer and no one is there to say they’re loved or not alone. Just another prison
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u/Anxious-Plantain-130 7h ago
Alzheimer's and dementia can be VERY hard to care for at home. My dad had dementia. I absolutely would have cared for him at home, but it was impossible. He was violent in his dementia, never before he got sick. Sometimes a home is the only way. :(
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u/Much_Fee7070 4h ago
My mother and I decided to take care of my father at home who had Alzheimer's and dementia. My mother could not BEAR to leave him at a home.
I agreed but yes, I knew it would be hell. Pure hell.
When he passed, my belief in a loving God, died with him.
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u/chippy-alley 14h ago
Well thats broke me.
My nan: I dont know who you are but my tummy thinks I like you
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u/CanAhJustSay 14h ago
Fun fact: The part of your brain that responds to emotion is in a different place than the bit that knows stuff, so you can see someone, not have a clue who they are, but know for sure that you love them.
Dementia is a cruel disease that takes the person in front of you so far beyond reach.
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u/luvitis 13h ago
When my grandmother took my great grandmother to the dementia care facility, they asked her if she knew who she was with. She said “I think this is my mom” and they said no, it’s not. So she said “well then this is my sister, Pavla” and they said no again. Becoming visibly frustrated she said “well then this must be my very good friend because I know I love her”.
Couldn’t fathom that someone so old was her daughter but knew they were close. At her funeral my grandma retold that story and said “I would be very lucky to be considered her good friend”
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u/CanAhJustSay 13h ago
Must admit, this made me tear up a little. How painfully bittersweet. The love remains but not the shared memories.
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u/pagani_ 14h ago
It is her grandmother, she says in brazilian portuguese 'Vó'.
That is a really heartbreaking video, is old here in brazil.
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u/Patrickfromamboy 3h ago
I’ve been studying Brasilian Portuguese for 10 years now and I’ve visited Brasil 19 times but I still have a hard time understanding what people are saying and I have to translate everything one word at a time to understand. I could understand some of this.
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u/feelingmyage 14h ago
The kids and I went to my grandpa’s nursing home. He was sitting staring into space. He turned his head and saw us, and for one second his face lit up and he smiled. Then just like that he went back to staring into space. It made me happy that he got to be really happy, just for a second. 💕
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u/bendubberley_ 14h ago
OP Note
If anyone can provide a translation as to what's being said in the video it would be much appreciated <3
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u/Crazy-Strategy7561 13h ago
Girl: What is it? ... Tell me, granny. What do you want to say?
Granny: I love you.
Girl: I love you too, granny. I love you too, ok? Don't cry. Everything's ok. Alright? We're taking care of you. Don't cry.
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u/bonzo-best-bud-1 13h ago
Firstly, I want to say I appreciate you. you are a good person for translating. But secondly,.fuuuuuck I am crying my eyes out now.
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u/Crazy-Strategy7561 9h ago
A very powerful video, my great granny suffered from Alzheimers in the final years of her life. Its impossible to watch without thinking about her.
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u/HelpfulAnt9499 13h ago
Portuguese right?
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u/Crazy-Strategy7561 9h ago
The brazilian portuguese, yes!
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u/HelpfulAnt9499 8h ago
My husband will be so proud of me for recognizing it haha. He’s Brazilian. I’m trying to learn Portuguese.
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u/Patrickfromamboy 3h ago
Eu também. I’ve been studying for 10 years now and I’ve visited Brasil 19 times but it’s still difficult to understand. I have to translate everything into English. I practice every day with my girlfriend and we’ve been doing it for 7 years but I still can’t converse.
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u/claudia_grace 12h ago
I didn't understand the words, but OMG, the message came through loud and clear and now here I am borderline sobbing.
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u/iNSPiREDS 13h ago
(when they lock eyes):
Granddaughter: "What is it? Speak, nan. What are you trying to tell me?"
Grandma: "I love you."
Granddaughter: (breaks down) "I love you to, nan. I love you too, okay? You don't need to cry. Everything's alright, you hear? We're taking care of you. Don't cry."
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u/Ankitta_ 13h ago
It's from Brazil.
She was saying "Let's take a sunlight after this, grandma?" Then, when grandmother looks at her: "What's wrong, grandma? Tell me. What you want to tell me?". Grandmother whispers "I love you". She replies crying: "I love you too grandma. I love you. There's no need to cry. Everything is fine. We are taking care of you, okay?".
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u/Disastrous_Course_96 14h ago
Alzheimer’s. The worst of the worst. So incredibly happy you had this moment.
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u/TKD_Moms 14h ago
Lost my mom to this and I was able to spend time with her, feed her, laugh, dance, I was lucky she still had that fighting spirit inside her.
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u/looklikeyoulikeme 14h ago
My mom had dementia only at the very end of her life (literally the last few weeks). It was a soul crushing time. I don't know how it is that people gather the continued strength to help their loved ones through years of it, but they have my utmost respect. Maybe love has made them as tough as iron.
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u/Sirenista_D 13h ago
Also lost my m9m to this disease. In what turned out to be about 3 or 4 days before she passed, my daughter and I went to go visit her and for the first time in about a year she made direct eye contact with me the moment we walked in the room and wouldn't let it go until she finally turned to my daughter and did the same. In her eyes I felt like I could read the love she was trying to show eme, she was telling me goodbye. She wanted me to know, she knew I was there. I told her how much I love her and I knew she loved me. I also told her it was OK to go now. I broke down crying. Kinda like I am right now
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u/Sunshinebear2007 12h ago
My mum died 7 weeks ago and had had dementia for 9 years. It was a living hell for her and for all of us who loved her. The cruelest of diseases.
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u/mxcnslr2021 13h ago
Oh after years to say hi again.....I can't stop crying. So sad and beautiful...... my heart can't take this anymore!!
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u/Frequent_Command_458 12h ago
My mum has Alzheimer's and the last time she spoke to me was she said "thank you for my kiss, I love you" after I kissed her on the forehead.
That was about two and a half years ago and she's not said a word to me since.
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u/Unexpected-Xenomorph 13h ago
This hits me hard , myself and my family went through this with my mum. Dementia is a cruel evil disease
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u/Hot_Hat_1225 13h ago
So happy for her that she has the moment on camera. I wish I would’ve had something like that when I cared for my Grandmother
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u/Artbyfuzz 11h ago
This made my cry tonight. I lost my mother to cancer years ago. I cannot imagine having your mother in your life who doesn’t recognise you is. I’m not religious, but god bless this girl for caring for her mother like that. Makes me miss my mum and wish I had looked after her like this.
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u/Autumn1114 10h ago
I remember those fleeting but deeply loving moments with my dad. The 30 second tears acknowledging a genuine love and appreciation for each other. And then just like that, I’d lose his lucidity. But always, always we had the weather to talk about; it was the one thing that would keep him present and engaged. It’s been almost 10 years since his passing and not a day goes by that I don’t check the weather and say to myself, what’s the weather gonna be today dad?
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u/pocahlontras 13h ago
Just a correction: it's her granddaughter. Grandma says "eu te amo" and the girl says "eu te amo também, vó".
It's beautiful either way.
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u/DsprtlySeekingSusan 12h ago
I didn't understand a word but I understood the entire exchange. What a beautiful moment.
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u/Adventurous-Egg-8818 12h ago
My sister has been diagnosed with vascular dementia. She was like my second mom and we have always been super close. We would talk for hours almost everyday. Seeing her decline is just devastating to me. I make it a point to tell her I love her and she tells me the same when I visit her. We can no longer talk on the phone due to her decline.
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u/fromamomof2 11h ago
My mom had a series of strokes and then dementia came on strong. I remember feeding her and asking if she knew who I was and her shaking her head no. The way that broke my heart is something I can't describe. Later I asked her if she had any kids and said a daughter and said my name. I replied Hi Mama and I saw the light of recognition in her eyes and for just a moment I had my Mom back. Great, now I'm crying. Dementia is cruel in so many ways, to both the person suffering it and their caregivers
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u/booster-rooster8008 11h ago
This hits home. Right before my grandma passed away, who was just like a mother to me, she looked at me and asked who are you? It's was a heart breaker, but all I could do was smile and be loving.
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u/momonomino 11h ago
My maternal grandmother had non-Alzheimers dementia. It wasn't as bad, but it was still bad. The last 3 years of her life, she couldn't remember anyone's name or their relation to her. She just knew that she loved all of us.
My mom's memory is starting to go. It's just little things right now, but it's also little movements I see she's trying to hide that she uses to jog her memory. It's slowly taking longer and longer for them to work. I dread the day when everything fails.
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u/LDawnBurges 9h ago
I feel so bad for anyone watching a loved one go through this. I can’t even imagine how difficult that must be.
My Hubby had Hospital Delirium (after being hospitalized for Pneumonia) and he at least knew that I was his wife. When the Dr came & questioned him, I was incredibly scared & worried, bc he didn’t know the year, where we lived, his Bday, etc. After the Dr left, my Hubby said, ‘Idk what’s wrong, but I can read your face, you know’.
I went to the bathroom, cried, then ‘fixed my face’ (as my Mom used to say) and came out trying to remember to not LOOK worried or scared.
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u/historychick1988 9h ago
It's like you can feel her mind hanging onto the doorjamb by its fingertips out of sheer will...until it's inevitably pulled back into the other room.
It's just devastatingly heartbreaking.
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u/Attempt-989 8h ago
Alzheimer’s is a cruel, insidious disease. Any little moment like this is a rare and wonderful treasure. This broke me. I miss you, Dad.
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u/PanderBaby80085 8h ago
Going through this transition. I love your dad too. May God bless you
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u/Attempt-989 6h ago
Thank you and, of course, the same to you. I am sorry you are going through this. Be good to yourself.
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u/Infinite-Raisin-8970 7h ago
this is very sweet, but it's acc her grandma, she calls her grandma in the clip.
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u/ComprehensiveDoubt55 6h ago
My grandmother has dementia. I almost felt like it was worse when she would have longer periods of being lucid. I remember my mom went back to see her and she argued that my mom wasn’t her daughter. She stood under a childhood photo going, “Ma, look. It’s me Barbara.” My mom had to leave home the next day and it came to her that it was my mom who had been there. My uncle said she sobbed for two days straight feeling heartbroken.
This video hit me hard. While she’s doing well and happy, I wish I could go back a few more years and tell her I love her while she still remembered me. I’m not going to be okay when she’s gone.
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u/MoreElephant8849 6h ago
I lost my mum to this horrible disease back in 2020. My last visit with her she too remembered who I was and told me that she loved me. I chose not to see her at the end when she wasn’t responsive. I could not have my last memory of her on her death bed. I’ve watch my Dad and my Nanna take their last breaths. It’s my first memories of them when I think about either my Dad or my Nanna and I didn’t want my last memory of my Mum spoiled.
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u/literall_bastard 5h ago
She said “I love you”. And the grand dotter said “I love you too, do t cry gramma”
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u/CtheRula 13h ago
Damn it I keep running into these videos when I’m on the toilet. Now I’m tearing up trying to regain my composure.
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u/Fearless-Sherbet-754 13h ago
I may not understand the language, but I definitely understand the emotions.
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u/StupendusDeliris 13h ago
Shh everyone stop. I need to watch this 15 more times and hold my baby Omg. The love she has for her daughter. The pain and confusion she’s is going through. But she somewhere deep down knows that’s her baby and she loves her baby.
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u/DistractedByCookies 13h ago
My mum had the test yesterday, results in2 weeks (but we are pretty sure what they're going to say). So I suppose my future will include hoping for moments like this. It's all a lot to process
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u/pitlovex23 10h ago
💜💜💜 wishing you and your mum good news. My maternal grandfather died from Alzheimer’s 8 years ago and although my mom is only 62 I’m dreading the day we get the news as I know it’s coming eventually. In the last few years we’ve seen her forget the names of people she knows and struggle with finding her words
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u/DistractedByCookies 5h ago
Thank you! My dad and I (and less so my brother as he lives in another country) have been seeing those signs for a while now, but my mum refused to get checked. So her deciding to get tested is a big thing. The way she described how the tests went isn't hopeful, but who knows.
Hugs to you for your mum <3
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u/Mangopugtech 13h ago
Must be so hard losing yourself with Alzheimers, having these big gaps in memory. This was so wholesome 🥲
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u/Professional_Ad_8 13h ago
My mom had a lucid moment about 3 years into full blown Alzheimer’s. I was leaving her nursing home after a visit and she looked at me in my face ( normally she looked everywhere but)my 12 year old daughter wasn’t with me that day but that’s who she wanted to warn about. She said very clearly and forcefully “ please tell me that you will cut my granddaughters hair and don’t let her listen to rock and roll ( mom was a huge big band fan) I almost laughed in her face she was so serious. I told her I would take her wishes into consideration and I laughed all the way home and every time I think of it.
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u/Pale_Deer719 13h ago
It’s moments like this where we should cherish the time with our family members especially, the elderly family members.
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u/ColeDelRio 12h ago
I miss my mom. She had this for 7 years and I would do anything to even have to care for her versus mourning her.
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u/Arcade1980 12h ago
There was a point in time where it would be the last time my dad recognized me and called me by name, little did I know that would be the last time. By the end he completely forgot who I was.
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u/slick6719 11h ago
Tears of joy! My dad recognized me for the first time in years but knew his granddaughter. Been awhile but I understand how she feels. Precious moment!
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u/kateluvsthe80s 11h ago
I used to be a dementia caregiver. Not to be a total downer, but every time I've seen this happen with an Alzheimer patient, where they are more lucid and remember their loved one, they died within two weeks.
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u/dark1on50 11h ago
I miss you babcia! That horrible illness took away my beloved grandmother in the most horrific way.
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u/liminalwombat 11h ago
This is so heartbreaking but I'm glad they had this moment and that they can revisit it. My parents are getting older and I'm terrified of Alzheimer's and dementia. They're both such sharp, smart people and I can't bear the thought of them losing that, let alone having to see it happen to them.
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u/ClassicDecision1602 11h ago edited 11h ago
It’s actually the grandma. They’re Brazilian. But equally emotive nonetheless. I lost my grandma about 7 months ago and miss her terribly. The last year she deteriorated and wouldn’t recognize us sometimes. Amo-te Avó.
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u/Expensive_Sundae_199 11h ago
That is so beautiful I know how she feels my mom had alzheimers just love them
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u/Powered-by-Chai 10h ago
It was like my uncle dying of dementia. Mostly he would mumble responses and stare off into nothing, but then he'd start telling you a story of him being a troublemaker and he'd look you right in the eyes and it was like the life returned to his face. Miss you, crazy ol Uncle Dennis...
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u/Long_Cod7204 9h ago
A redditor of note once said....."Every woman dies, but not every woman lives!". Lets all realize that just because a pumpkin is round, it's not that it loses usefulness around Easter. A great poet said that one.
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u/lololowlowlow 9h ago
My dad had Alzheimer’s, and every time I visited him, he’d ask, 'Who are you?' I’d say, 'I’m your daughter,' and he’d say, 'Really?' and hug me like we were meeting for the first time. He passed away over two years ago, and it’s still hard especially knowing how confused he must’ve felt at the end of his life.
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u/Annanymuss 8h ago
I used to have an aunt (political related) she had alzehimer as well and dementia, she forgot about her children, her grandchildren, everyone, but for whatever reason everytime she saw me (maybe 3 times a year no more) she knew exactly who I was, she calles me by my name, asked me about my parents if they were still working, etc always so happy to see me. The mind is something incredible
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u/samaagfg 7h ago
It’s truly a cruel disease :(
This made me cry
I hope they find a cure for it soon
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u/EmperorMittens 6h ago edited 6h ago
Say My Name by Within Temptation is a real tear jerker as Sharon pours her heart into the performance.
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u/Scion_Dloth 6h ago
Unfortunately, Alzheimer's is hereditary; the daughter should definitely get checked out. 
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u/MoreElephant8849 6h ago
I lost my mum to this horrible disease back in 2020. My last visit with her she too remembered who I was and told me that she loved me. I chose not to see her at the end when she wasn’t responsive. I could not have my last memory of her on her death bed. I’ve watch my Dad and my Nanna take their last breaths. It’s my first memories of them when I think about either my Dad or my Nanna and I didn’t want my last memory of my Mum spoiled.
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u/Screaming_lambs 3h ago
When my grandma was in a care home and in the process of passing away she was asleep most of the time so we were sitting in her room near her bed and chatting. She woke up briefly and my aunty pointed at me and said 'look who's here!' and she recognised me. Before she was like this she was mostly awake after a fall and a long stay in hospital. I was showing her pictures of my cats on my phone, one of them was sunbathing in his back with tummy fully exposed. She said "oh I was I could be doing that" and I had to agree. She had a cat when I was little that didn't let anyone but her me pick her up, I think I got my cat whispering skills from her.
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u/JennyBird42 2h ago
My father is heading down this path & my heart breaks every day his capacity diminishes 😭😭
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u/SeattleHasDied 2h ago
One of the cruelest fucking diseases. I remember watcihing TV with my dad and one of those Aricept commercials came on once and after it ended, he laughed and said "I may be old, but at least I haven't lost my mind!". We were watching it at his apartment in a memory care community. Miiss you, Dad🥲
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u/S0k0n0mi 1h ago
I cant imagine a hell worse than your own mother forgetting you..
Looking my mother in the eyes and not seeing her love for me would destroy me.
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u/Landeler 14h ago
And a perfectly placed camera already recording to capture this moment, how fortunate
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u/flbadger 13h ago
Speaking as someone who’s going through something similar - I know my days with someone I love are coming to an end, - I ’m recording all the time.
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u/RiceWithChicken48 8h ago
My grandma has it and it is horrendous. I wouldn't wish it to my worst enemy, sincerely though! 😞
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u/Patrickfromamboy 3h ago
Brasilians. I’m glad I’ve been studying Brasilian Portuguese for 10 years now.
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u/tperks55 14h ago
More like r/mademecry