r/PMDD • u/RevolutionaryEssay91 • 1d ago
Trigger Warning Topic Does it ever get better?
I am so glad I found this sub first of all and I’m sending my love to all of you living this hell. I don’t know how to make this post in a proper way sounding coherent etc, but I wanted to ask does it get better? What’s the point of living if I know that for the rest of my life I’ll have to deal with this every month? Sometimes it will even start during my ovulation so I’ll literally only have a week where I’m being sane and actually have energy. During this good week or two weeks I do have energy and will to live I want to fix my life etc but then it all comes back. And there’s nothing to do other than wait it out. Where I’m currently I don’t have access to doctors so i can’t even ask to go on the pill or for antidepressants or anything like that and tbh I’m really scared of the pill since I’m also struggling with pcos and I feel it will just make it worse like it did when I want on the implant or however was called which just made me gain lots of weight. I don’t want to have to choose between not wanting tj kill my self every month and feeling good about my body even if that sounds superficial. I feel cursed and I feel hopeless I really don’t know if I can keep living this hell for the rest of my life and if it’s even worth it bc so far it isn’t, I know it’s the hormones or whatever talking rn but still it feels so real. This month I was relatively ok before my period I just felt very angry during my ovulation and the week before my period and now that I got it I just hate living once again and all the pmdd symptoms in general. Sorry for the messy post I really don’t have the energy for paragraphs or trying to make sense. I hate this I want it to end and knowing it never will reading stories of women in their 50s saying it doesn’t get better makes me pray for death or a terminal illness because everything in my life is shit and I have one - two weeks every month to try and fix it because my own body fights me and I can’t even find peace within me.
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u/ashnlibby 1d ago
I don’t know what to say but I understand. I only just realised today there was a condition for what we have. I thought I was just crazy and depressed!
I know you feel awful right now but the only thing that’s good about this, is that we do get to feel better after our period. I don’t know about you but when I’m in the bad stage I feel like dying but once I’m out, I barely remember that feeling.
I also don’t have access to doctors so not sure what the next step is. Let me know if you take any other steps, I’m very interested. Big hugs ❤️
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u/m5517h 1d ago
I hear it gets better after menopause from some women. I take Prozac to help, maybe you can try HERS, they do those medications by telemed and mail them to you.