r/WallStreetbetsELITE 26d ago

MEME Trump signs executive order instructing stocks to go back up after markets close.

Post image

F

65.3k Upvotes

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

543

u/drezbz 26d ago

He didn't tweet today after market closed, this is new and news.

272

u/Lostnspace859 26d ago

Probably playing golf on the tax payers dime

162

u/Tildengolfer 26d ago

“8 million for Transgen(der)ic mice.” But 18 million for a golf trip. Can you believe that? Can you believe that? Because I can’t believe that. Elon will investigate and we’ll get to bottom of this, it’s like what a lot of people say, and they’re saying things. Lots of things. Great things. Sometimes not so great things. But we’re going to get it done. We’ll get it done.

132

u/GoStockYourself 26d ago

Shit, 18 million dollars to keep Trump out of the office seems like a bargain

39

u/Blue_Raven_AZ 26d ago

🤘🙏☝️ severely undervalued comment

13

u/AssistanceCheap379 26d ago

Yeah, but it would be something like triple that if he never worked.

Which doesn’t seem like a lot, but 18 million over 6 weeks is still 3 million a week, so it would be like 9 million a week to never have him step into the White House ever again

Yeah, it’s worth it. 500 million a year for 4 years to keep him from doing any more damage honestly seems like a bargain.

But only if Musk goes with him

2

u/PraxicalExperience 25d ago

And his little toad, Vance.

1

u/Dry-Neck9762 24d ago

I'm surprised he hasn't made an official proclamation that Maralardo is the new official Whitehouse, and the current Whitehouse will be sold to the highest bidder - Elon would be the highest (on ketimine) bidder

1

u/Past-Application-552 24d ago

Don’t give him any ideas…

1

u/_robmillion_ 24d ago

I can stay out of the Whitehouse for less than half of that!

1

u/AssistanceCheap379 24d ago

You’re staying out of the White House for $0 so far, clearly a better POTUS than Trump

1

u/BullsOnParadeFloats 23d ago

How much to send the lot of them on a rocket to mars?

1

u/KittyMushi 21d ago

And Vance too

2

u/DeepSeaDork 24d ago

Fuckin' A.

37

u/12OClockNews 26d ago

Doesn't matter if he's out of office. The guy is just a puppet for special interest groups and Putin, they're the ones doing the work behind the scenes. They draft the EOs and whatever else, he just waddles into the White House, signs whatever they put in front of him, and then waddles back to the golf course. There's no way in hell he knows what even a quarter of the EOs up to this point were about. He's quite literally everything they accused Biden of being, and they cheer him on like good little sheep.

6

u/timburnerslee 25d ago

The checks and balances are absolutely not checking nor balancing. Constitution? Rule of law? Those aren’t needed anymore

3

u/Ok-Photograph2954 21d ago

His cheques are no good and he is unbalanced!

1

u/12OClockNews 25d ago

The one thing this debacle has shown is that the mighty "checks and balances" were just a facade. The only real reason what's happening now didn't happen earlier is because the right person didn't have enough motivation to make it happen. There was absolutely nothing stopping the US from going down this path despite people believing there was.

2

u/Ok_Yak_8668 25d ago

I'm convinced he finds out about his eos from hate watching CNN in the clubhouse. Then reacts to it. 

4

u/thirstytrumpet 26d ago

I love how much he is hurting them though. And it’s only just the beginning.

2

u/HoodRattusNorvegicus 25d ago

You love how much Trump is hurting ordinary workers and their families? Mmkay..

2

u/FrostedDonutHole 25d ago

...how much to give him a coronary?

1

u/GoStockYourself 25d ago

We should start a GoFundMe to send him a thank you gift.

2

u/Necessary_Ad2114 24d ago

One million per hole, that’s better than Stormy Daniels got. 

2

u/the_lazycoder 24d ago

Let’s buy him a golf course and keep him out permanently. We would do the world a huge favor.

2

u/Sanbaddy 24d ago

You can probably run the math on that. Since he’s been in office he’s cost the country trillions, literally.

Edit:

Came out to roughly 1,080,000,000 ( billion). Which is much less than a trillion. Shit, we could literally pay him not to be in office. That’s how fucked things gotten lol.

2

u/Mysterious_Ad7461 22d ago

Someone had a serious take in 2017 about how we should just make Trump a figurehead king and have an American royal family, I thought then and I think now this is stupid because I’m American and I have a seething hatred for monarchs.

But now? Fine, let’s do it. It keeps him mollified and it lets his ignorant voters feel like they’re winning something without killing the rest of us.

2

u/3ckSm4rk57h35p07 26d ago

I'd contribute a third of that and come out in the black. 

2

u/BeefistPrime 26d ago

A bargain at 20x the price

1

u/janiskr 25d ago

It is cheaper to have sane president. Who is not owned by Russia might be good as well, just an extra bonus.

1

u/GoStockYourself 25d ago

That is a bit much to expect out of the US electorate.

1

u/Ididit-notsorry 23d ago

I'd chip in.

1

u/prefim 22d ago

I'd tell him he can play as much golf as he likes but he's not getting a security detail follow him around as its a waste of money and doge said they needed to stop.... he can phone secret service if there's a problem and they'll come right over.

1

u/Ok-Half8705 21d ago

Fore(head)!

43

u/Equal_Cellist9750 26d ago

Elon is now recommending removal of the Presidents position. Its a big waste of money.

6

u/OkDragonfruit9026 26d ago

Actually, that’d be a hilarious reasoning for his takeover. Hey, I’m making the government more efficient and firing everyone. Lemme fire Trump and asume his role!

Suddenly we have a second Hitler.

Well, not we, you, I’m in Spain.

2

u/wannacumnbeatmeoff 24d ago

We is correct. Hitler wasn't just bad for Germany.

1

u/OkDragonfruit9026 24d ago

Yeah, I’m aware that we’re in a globalised world and everybody depends on everybody else.

2

u/zombieslurpee 23d ago

That's what shocked me about the US right now.

Ok, you voted for Trump, whatever. I'm no one to tell if you're wrong or right. But why the fuck are they tolerating Musk in the white house?

He's no one to be there. He's the little bitch that should be sent to his home country

1

u/FamousUniversity5033 22d ago

Nobody can get rid of him now. He bought Dump the presidency, he rigged his election, he's ransacking the US government, getting rid of the evidence, avoiding people.

Touching him, his cars, or anything Tesla is now an act of terrorism. He's a pussy, maniac on drugs Should be deported.

1

u/WoodLouseAustralasia 23d ago

Lol fucking epic

1

u/YorkshireDancer 22d ago

Third Hitler. Putin is the reincarnation.

1

u/TankApprehensive3053 26d ago

It's now the King's throne.

1

u/ArbitraryMeritocracy 26d ago

Cheeto Casino Chapter 11 king

1

u/copasetical 25d ago

say more about this please?

4

u/GearhedMG 26d ago

And that is the first 7 weeks!

3

u/Capital-Hornet6846 26d ago

Brilliant sequence here

1

u/HipHipM3 26d ago

They voted to see illegal immigrants on video getting arrested and deported. The people who voted for Trump only care about themselves. They don't even care about their fellow Trump supporters. They would sacrifice one of them for dinner if a civil war erupted.

1

u/Real_Life_Sushiroll 26d ago

America deserves $8 million dollars of transgender mice imo.

1

u/eutohkgtorsatoca 26d ago

Just offer him a ride on X they can drop him off on the way up

1

u/Fledgeling 26d ago

Why are you spelling it like that? Makes the quote more confusing

1

u/Objective_Star_191 25d ago

I still can’t believe people voted him in    

1

u/YveisGrey 25d ago

Dude spent 20mil to attend the superbowl only to leave early when he saw his team was down bad

1

u/no_dana_only_zul 25d ago

This perfectly encapsulates this debacle of a presidency.

1

u/ExaminationChoice641 24d ago

Just found Trump’s reddit account

1

u/DiCk01202025 24d ago

This is great thank you

1

u/Substantial_Court792 23d ago

That is awesome! You should do impersonations at parties.

1

u/noleksum12 23d ago

It's embarrassing that he doesn't know enough to question what transgenic means and just assumes it's bad and liberal because the word trans is in it.

It's scary that his speech writer and all the 'geniuses' around him didn't inform him or correct him.

1

u/Exotic-Champion-7257 23d ago

Bigly. More bigly than ever before. And men will be crying (men who have never cried before) while they are thanking him.

1

u/ViolentEngineering 23d ago

I already read that in his voice😂

1

u/dodexahedron 22d ago

This is a great speech. The best speech. TREMENDOUS speech. People should tell you. I bet they tell you. I can't believe it. Can you believe it? I didn't tell you. People tell you. Greatest speech. CHY-nuh.

1

u/Zealousideal-Dog517 21d ago

They're pinky and the brain - one is a genius, the other insane!!

1

u/Bigbromboy 21d ago

Unfortunately his flying monkeys are always working

1

u/edwbuck 21d ago

And 4 Trillion, that's 4,000 Billion for his erratic handling of the economy, lost.

8

u/cleverDonkey123 26d ago

Unrelated and unwilling to Google that : is he even a good golfer?

22

u/Lostnspace859 26d ago

He’s isn’t good at anything he does. Not even applying self tanner.

So I doubt it.

6

u/cleverDonkey123 26d ago

I will go with "bad golfer" then. 👍

6

u/Rit91 25d ago

He is bad, he cheats at golf. When other people golf with him they notice because he'll kick their ball into the bunker if they get a good shot.

5

u/2ndDogga 25d ago

His caddies do most of the cheating for him. Rick Reilly caddied for him and wrote about it in Sports Illustrated years ago.

5

u/eutohkgtorsatoca 26d ago

I guess they have a tanning corridor in the white house. Everyone out and then he runs down the hall naked and ends up looking like Tarzan

1

u/Alternative_Slip_513 22d ago

I’m guessing the tanner is only applied neck-up. Melania wouldn’t know cause she’s probably not seen him naked since Baron was conceived.

1

u/Key-Guarantee595 24d ago edited 24d ago

I’ve read that he cheats. Especially when he playing at his own golf courses. Media even has a tape of him cheating, he didn’t give a 💩that they got him on tape cheating. Go on TikTok, they have a golf montage of all his cheating. https://www.tiktok.com/@meidastouch/video/7367741788574043434?lang=en

1

u/Alternative_Slip_513 22d ago

Totally agree 👍🏽 😂

16

u/hungrypotato19 26d ago

He cheats.

"Trump doesn’t just cheat at golf," [Rick] Reilly wrote. "He throws it, boots it, and moves it. He lies about his lies. He fudges and foozles and fluffs. At Winged Foot, where Trump is a member, the caddies got so used to seeing him kick his ball back onto the fairway they came up with a nickname for him: 'Pele.'”

https://www.palmbeachpost.com/story/sports/2023/02/03/trump-and-golf-fancy-resorts-a-list-partners-cheating-at-highest-level/69857594007/

Even Samuel L. Jackson says Trump cheats.

https://youtu.be/Tu2xnbaI3Ds?si=bmeCr6OQ7v_9rBeF

And Alice Cooper (who is MAGA)

https://ultimateclassicrock.com/alice-cooper-golf-donald-trump/

And Oscar De La Hoya

https://golf.com/news/oscar-de-la-hoya-details-how-donald-trump-cheats-at-golf/

7

u/OwOlogy_Expert 25d ago

There's a reason you don't see his diapered ass in actual golf competitions.

3

u/WasabiHound 25d ago

Such a pity Kim Jong Il is dead. They would have had an epic game - he played a 38 under par game with 11 holes in one.

Kim Jong Il golf game (ESPN article)

Compared to him, the Mango Mussolini is a rank amateur.

2

u/Asleep_Operation8330 22d ago

Pele, I laughed at that one.

1

u/Iamnotapickle 26d ago

Can you provide any proof that Alice Cooper is maga? I just went on a hunt and that doesn’t appear to be true.

10

u/Albin4president2028 26d ago

I heard he intentionally sets up 'tournaments' for just himself to claim he's king of whatever course. (Saw someone post it on reddit earlier today)

I havent looked into it either. Don't really care too.

9

u/UnkleRinkus 26d ago

I read about this. Besides often telling the staff at the course (which he owns) to just give him the trophy, because he "plays better than that guy", he sets up tournaments where everyone but him plays together, and then he plays later, alone, and just manages to edge by the leader. Sometimes he manages to do that when he is giving a speech, across the country.
https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/sportswriter-explains-donald-trump-allegedly-003013764.html?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAACGJOGjOHwxfC5QxTPK9YN2z1dPRud6qC2vblxxVI2HVsocSyXPmjjfbJMgQcFiauDHsTLvfcbQHNRS9us0yl_V10PwwOvoq0liuM_A9CKtWlW5MVtlVK__JP99PNkMfHPIRZtfihU_uXGSXoziEB8bAsu5ikP-MJ-7hUHPtZ1iB

6

u/cleverDonkey123 26d ago

I like this information so it's true.

2

u/Albin4president2028 26d ago

Sounds legit. I'm with you 👍

2

u/TheNerdJournals 26d ago

Same! Oh shit am I MAGA now?

1

u/Albin4president2028 25d ago

You might want to get that checked out. I hear it's contagious. (If you can afford the American health care system)

4

u/DadJokeBadJoke 26d ago

He plays the first round when he opens a new club and claims that as the first championship.

Also, this https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a27431421/donald-trump-golf-cheat-club-champion-child-ball-water/

1

u/quatro0004 24d ago

He may have taken inspiration from Admiral-General Haffaz Aladeen (The Dictator movie) where the Admiral-General Aladeen holds his own Olympics and he always wins in all kinds of sports.

2

u/MrBurnerHotDog 24d ago

He can barely walk without tipping over and he has no control on his bowels so he wears diapers. There's no way he's good at a physical activity, even one like golf where he can just ride around in a cart and have someone hand him a club

Maybe years ago he was solid at it, but he's also had stories of cheating following him around for decades so it's doubtful

1

u/MasterSpliffBlaster 26d ago

He's 80 yr old. Golf might be seen as an old mans sport but reality is once you get to a certain age your swing goes to shit and most week end hackers can out drive and out swing you

He is also a massive cheat, which is not great for a sport that is mostly honesty driven when you aren't being followed by profession tv cameras.

1

u/Affectionate_War_279 26d ago

A notorious cheat by all accounts 

1

u/somethrows 25d ago

He is a well known cheater at golf.

1

u/MIZ_09 25d ago

He’s got a pretty good swing for his age. I would say he’s a better golfer than most in his age bracket. He better for how often he plays.

1

u/Bluejayadventure 25d ago

Apparently he cheats at golf

1

u/IanJMo 25d ago

He's won the championship at all the golf courses he owns!!!! No championships at other courses though.

1

u/Op2myst1 24d ago

I read “Commander in Cheat” by Rick Reilly which really was entertaining. Trump is a pretty good golfer but cheats non-stop. Has his golf cart rigged so it goes twice as fast as anyone else’s, and moves balls and other tricky stuff. Most bizarre was he would claim victory at one of his club’s tournaments even if he wasn’t there if HIS score (at a Dorene course) was better than the winner’s.

1

u/wannacumnbeatmeoff 24d ago

He is about the same as Kim Jong Un. Has the lowest handicap in history and never misses a fairway/green/put.

1

u/Boatdrnk32 22d ago

He says he's a 2 HDCP but like most things out of his mouth its a lie,

1

u/Strong-Set6544 21d ago

Unrelated and unwilling to Google that : is he even a good golfer?

Yeah, he’s unanimously among the elite celebrity golfers. But to no surprise, he’s unanimously considered a huge cheater too

0

u/WholeHogRawDog 25d ago

He is actually really good for an 80 year old. He played with Bryson Dechambeau on YouTube and despite his old-man swing, he hits is very well. Even if they edited out any bad shots, you can tell he knows how to play the game well.

11

u/Head_Engineering_956 26d ago

Another 3 million stolen from taxpayers.

2

u/Minute-Struggle6052 25d ago

Highest paid athlete in the world

1

u/Lostnspace859 25d ago

Wow you know what, he is.

Never realized that.

1

u/-XanderCrews- 26d ago

Gotta spend it before it’s gone

1

u/Efficient_Growth_942 25d ago

nope not today, but 18/50 days so far https://trumpgolftrack.com/

1

u/NewHampshireWoodsman 25d ago

That's every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday

1

u/abaggins 25d ago

Please let him play golf. I dc how much it costs. 

1

u/Enough-Meaning1514 25d ago

Nope, people pay between 1 - 5 million dollars just to have dinner with him. Probably he is having a few too many dinners tonight.

1

u/Patrick_Hobbes 25d ago

Nah, too tired after all that time he spent cosplaying as a car salesman.

1

u/486Junkie 24d ago

So far, he owes me $90 Million after tariffs, taxes, and 500% interest rates.

1

u/prancing_moose 24d ago

I’d be very happy if he did that for the rest of his term. Just play golf. We’d all be much better off.

1

u/OneDilligaf 23d ago

No probably about it.

1

u/MiddleAgeCool 22d ago

And quite the dime it is. Have a look for the per night accommodation costs for the secret service agents protecting him when staying at Trump Organization properties. In some cases, the House Oversight Committee found that you or I would be charged around $250 a night but the secret service were being charged over $1k.

1

u/Old_Manner4779 22d ago

where do you think the tariffs are going?

1

u/Exciting-Economy9460 21d ago

This guy gets it! Salute 🫡🙌🏼

1

u/Ok_Magician_1111 21d ago

I live near his golf course in wpb and see him way too damn much. Way more than his last term and we’re only two months in.

9

u/Kingkongcrapper 26d ago

That’s because he’s not paying attention just like he said, right? He’s just decided on a quiet evening because he’s known for his long hours reading alone, right?

2

u/Rex_Beever 25d ago

Might mean it’s not another 1-2% drop tomorrow. He might tweet from the toilet at 3:30 am though

1

u/xXMuschi_DestroyerXx 26d ago

-and how things bad for Biden at 11

1

u/vzo1281 26d ago

Maybe I'm miss-remembering, but when the market dropped almost 700 points last year during Biden, wasn't he bragging how Biden was?

And today, nor even conservative will say anything, let alone Trump. HA!

1

u/KallaFotter 26d ago

Twitter was being attacked so there was issues logging in 🤣
He had to find something else to do while sitting on the golden toilet.

https://downdetector.com/status/twitter/

1

u/ExcitableSarcasm 26d ago

Bobros... WE ARE READY

1

u/BillButtlickerII 25d ago

He posted over 100 times on lies social

1

u/Tachyonzero 25d ago

It’s like 2018 manufacturing ragebaiting news.

1

u/pizzatoney 25d ago

Get ready for market reforms - probably will take a bit before it gets started but never know when.

1

u/Am4oba 25d ago

He barely tweets anymore. He posts all of his messages on his "Truth Social" platform. And he was active last night.

Google "Truth Social Trump" if you care to see.

1

u/HerMajestyTheQueef1 25d ago

It's sad that I had to double check if this post was satire or not aha 

1

u/[deleted] 25d ago

He's out buying a Tesla first. Had to make an account and a password first. And 2FA. Will take some time for a not so pratical boomer.

1

u/Apprehensive_Sun_535 25d ago

He’s,going to put tariffs on the stock market next if it doesn’t go back up.

1

u/Ok-Piccolo-1961 22d ago

El Waco decided to keep signing stupidities !!!!!