r/braincancer • u/Nineshadowsdeep • 3d ago
Regarding memory loss.
5 brain surgeries along with brain damage from swelling fragmented quite a few of my memories. It's odd, I still know math, science, and such but I have a hard time recalling my school days at all. I'm 37 so I guess maybe it happens normal people to some degree. But when I'm able go across the country to my home town, I feel really bad about seeing my old friends just because I have so few memories of them, and that's usually the conversation topic you end up at. I just don't know how to handle that. I feel like a completely different person than they grew up with. So I avoid it. I saw my family and that was weird enough, so I just avoided seeing my old friends at all. I just don't know how to handle it. Any advice? It's getting close to my trip back this spring. I mean sure I could explain it, but having to explain that to everyone just seems exhausting.
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u/GizmoPatterson 3d ago
I have the exact opposite- I have zero short term memory. Definitely letting people know and they can share with you and experience fun memories again. Sometimes smell can really trigger memories
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u/Nineshadowsdeep 3d ago
We don't have many honeysuckles up north, at least where I'm at. I did notice my last trip to Arkansas the smell didn't exactly give me a memory, just a really great feeling.
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u/Murky-Neighborhood81 3d ago
My memory is so extremely random, I really don't get it but it's become part of me so I accept it.
People around me do the same gladly, and what my fellow companion here already said, it's important to bring up memories from the past, sometimes it clicks and u remember it, although not always lol
Our disease is so invisible from the outside.
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u/Nineshadowsdeep 3d ago
If I have any perks it's having all the scars and Vp shunt sticking out of my head that makes it clear something is wrong. Small benefit for looking like frankenstine's monster I suppose.
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u/Murky-Neighborhood81 3d ago
Haha yeah, I miss a bone flap so wearing a bowling ball on my head nowadays, and the haircut underneath including the skull with a huge hole isn't very symmetrical either, I can't be arsed really, I'm still around :-)
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u/Agitated_Carrot3025 1h ago
I've had 3 myself and I feel what you're saying. I'm 41. I can't do squat about it so it doesn't pester me much, but it took me and my friends & family awhile to get used to telling me stories I'm in as if I'm hearing about an episode of my favorite TV show that I definitely must have missed.
I'm just really open about it with anyone close to me: You're gonna tell me stuff I should know and it'll be new information. I'm gonna tell you stuff I think you haven't heard but you have. Just bear with me on the first part and be patient with the latter. I even tell my employees " If you think I might have forgotten, ask. I may well have."
Peace, love and strength my friend ✌️♥️💪
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u/Extension-Sir-6685 3d ago
May be let your friends tell stories that happen in his might help you. Recall your friends then you can add your own stories