r/foundsatan • u/OncexMidzyForever95 • 11d ago

What's wrong with you

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8.8k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

36 comments sorted by

153

u/vinsclortho 11d ago

I always tell my kids either, knock that off/keep it up or/and I'll hit the ejector button". I've been saying it for about 4-5 years now specifying the hazard light button as the switch and they're only now starting to question whether or not it would actually eject them from the backseat.

1

u/BloodMoon2025 9d ago

That's when you find someone with actual ejector seats in a car to show the kids

97

u/-Hi_how_r_u_xd- 11d ago

Don’t worry, that’s just Bambi’s mother.

60

u/FineCritism3970 11d ago

"Kids , your fate will be the same if you keep asking santa for expensive gifts every year"

30

u/Calif3r 11d ago

I bet these kids are in bed Christmas Eve early. Not because they are excited, but because they are absolutely terrified Santa will murder them.

9

u/Imfromsite 11d ago

Must be traveling on the highway to Hell.

9

u/Slartibartfast39 11d ago

"FUCK YOU BLITZEN!". Father Christmas

7

u/OutrageousRhubarb853 11d ago

I usually say “what a silly place to take a nap” and the older my kids are the more laughs it gets.

7

u/TheKnife142 11d ago

He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger

4

u/Thealmightylotad 10d ago

I would use this opportunity to introduce them to Krampus.

7

u/puzzledmint 11d ago

Now I have Weird Al's "The Night Santa Went Crazy" stuck in my head.

Which is awesome, so thank you for that.

4

u/TinyGirlPussy 11d ago

now, kids will think that Santa is a bad guy 😭

3

u/tiilet09 11d ago

So they finally know the truth.

2

u/notLankyAnymore 11d ago

You don’t even need to teach your kids that myth to begin with.

1

u/DoctorJiveTurkey 11d ago

Sounds like Jack Handey

1

u/RussianStoner24 11d ago

🤣 oh my goodness. My dad would always just say they were taking a nap. My sensitive self couldn’t handle the truth

1

u/This-Present4077 11d ago

"Deep thoughts with Jack Handy"

1

u/Glittering_Nobody402 11d ago

"The deer is taking a nap"

1

u/Essycat 11d ago

😈😈😈

1

u/Demonic_Akumi 11d ago

Sounds like something my dad would say and my mother would yell at him for it.

1

u/AurumaeRayne 11d ago

No no.... let him cook

1

u/Dryse 10d ago

Lighten up, thats funny

1

u/ZenoOfTheseus 10d ago

Grandpa got revenge

1

u/angelwolf71885 10d ago

I always say mmm breakfast/lunch/dinner

1

u/optix_clear 9d ago

Oh no. Violence and abuse on an animal. I would no longer trust my parent after that.

1

u/rosa_bot 7d ago

*foundsanta

1

u/chronically_eeby 5d ago

Do you also eat rabbit on Easter?

1

u/legoatt5 1d ago

perhaps santa had a few too many glasses of eggnog