r/freelance • u/Witty_Evening_618 • 6d ago
How to not get emotional after breaking up with a client
I recently stopped work with a client after six months of working closely with them. We developed an awesome relationship and they viewed me as a trusted ally. Unfortunately they were very late to pay me and we mutually agreed it was best to pause my work for them until they had a better sense of their financial situation. Things became contentious after they strung me along about paying me for six weeks (nearly four months late total) and I decided I had no choice but to threaten to get my attorney involved. They finally got their act together and processed my payment.
I feel like they took advantage of me and my flexibility but at the same time, I really like them as a person and miss our working relationship. It feels like I broke up with my significant other and I’m honestly sad about it. Even if I hadn’t escalated things, I doubt they’d be able to afford to keep working with me. I previously offered to change my payment terms, but they never took me up on that, so I really feel like it’s done. Any advice on how to move on?
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u/Ashamed_Win_2416 5d ago
It’s business. They weren’t paying you. It’s ok to feel—you’re human but you need to move on to find a client that is a better fit and can pay you.
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u/Traditional_Earth149 5d ago
I really struggle with things like this, I’ve took on a retainer client this year which meant breaking up with another client, I gave them a months notice wrapped up all my projects for them but it still felt bad.
Sometimes you just have to know you did it for the right reasons and tell your self that.
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u/cawfytawk 5d ago
It's understandable to take it personally but you can't because it's not. Late payers are par for the course and always a risk when freelancing. This is more telling of their values and professionalism than their personalities. Paying your vendors on time is showing that you value their talent, time and contribution, and want to entice them to want to work with you again. Clients that don't have severe internal management issues and is a red flag that they're a sinking ship. This has happened to me many times and it was an indicator of financial problems that caused them to inevitably implode.
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u/BusinessStrategist 5d ago
Keep the dialog going. Mention the fact that you understand that the economy is in turmoil and that we all are in tight financial situations.
Keep in mind that YOUR relationship is with people and not a business. Some may value you more than others. And the survival of the business trumps all relationships.
Thank your primary contact for helping you get up to date with late payments.
It doesn’t hurt to keep the relationship going. You’re not a family member but a good friend.
Make sure to differentiate “business” decisions from personal ones.
Storm clouds have a tendency to pass and the sun can shine again.
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u/prettytheft 3d ago edited 3d ago
Could you also be feeling sad because you feel taken advantage of? Perhaps you let someone cross your boundaries and you feel a little violated about it?
Live and learn. This was a good lesson in boundaries, I think. I'd explore why you feel so deeply about this, and try and define where the boundary should have been.
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u/im_bi_strapping 6d ago
There's no moving on shortcuts. You just have to feel your feelings. If it feels like a breakup, treat it like one and cry into a bucket of ice cream while watching a film or show about people trying to work together but having a real shit time of it. So maybe Chernobyl?