He get call on da light box today (and very rude, say I need be quiet since he talkin bout werk) and Dey talk about get hi bird job? Not sure what dat mean but he say he wood be home more.
(I got a call from a former coworker for an interview tomorrow. 3 days in office. I hope it works out cause I cannot wait to be done with this uber crap).
Dis Whiskers. Ifn yoo meen yoo hafta dwive oober til get hi bird job, den, Mai meowmy sai to tel yoo dat her brudre mai unkel dwove taxi many gazillion billyun furebers aggo an he say hee lern moar abowt hoomin nachur dan he ebber plannd on noeing (or wantd too noe). Meowmy sai gud luk an ai doo too. Ai tink dat da hi bird job soun lik it tayst yummi.
Yeah I had a woman trauma dump on my last night in a “how the actual ____ did you think it was okay to tell me this story” way. Not going into any more details other than “how am I supposed to respond to your worst uber driver story as your current uber driver” because what she told me is horrible. And you just, hear things.
Which I get, some people need to vent (and it’s why I didn’t shut her down). But still.
Diz bery badz. Youz dadz shuldz knowz dat da Cat Law sayz da hoomanz can noz movez if da kittiez is sittinz on dem or touchiez dem. Iz Cat Law! Da hoomanz noz allowededez to breakz diz!
Youz debiniteately owed da catpawsationz. Elebenty millionz treatoz an az many nap lapz fur az longz as youz wantz an da yummy squishy fudz an da snugglez an cuddlez an scritchez an da fun toyz an da very fine boxes! Youz mayz habz to do da sooz if youz pawther noz agreez wif diz.
Deer fren Finn, iz Vivi (tortie an allso princesse). I doing a big consern fur yoo. Eberyone kno cat paw abowt lap-sitting. Iz fun- fundam- iz most basic rule fur hoomans when adopteded by feline purrsonell.
Habs yoor pawther showed any ovver confuse? Habs he talk funnie or get lost in yoor hause? I fink pawther need to go hooman pokey place to make sure he not sick or habs sum kind of hooman disorder.
Pwease keeps all of us heer imformed an try not doing a panic. I’m sure is simple pawblem (like hooman need allergee medisin or summing).
He say “I need to have money to buy yous fud. Since yous cloaca cannot handle normal cat fud yous fud is now 80 gajullion bucks.” But he do many cuddles last night so I think he okay. I look tonite when he home.
Also, you is tortie? So is Collete. She very spicy. Is you spicy?
Is Collete. And I tink Finn is Cloaca. He very rude. Always want play when sleep time. And he big and scary. I no want play cause he play ruff. But he is good cuddles sometimes.
Yous is pretty too. I has to be spicy with Finn acuz he no understand boundary.
Oh Finn yoo make me cry. Ai so want mai papa to be at home an neber go to werk!! He try for remote or hi-bird jobz but seemz like no one iz hiring heer rite nao. He sez all sorts of hoomins owt ob were here.
Hi brudder Teddy! Hope yous is well! Dad came home early last night and let me do under cover cuddles with him! Many forevers we do cuddles. Den I sing song of peeple dis morning and he say “you jerk face I try and get sleep afore” some word I no unnerstan but he have light box thing today.
Dad no get foto of unnercover cuddles acuz I stealf. But here foto of me happy with dad cuddles.
(He’s not gonna be happy with how long I’m gone on work days if I get this job, but it’ll only be 3 days in the office a week. Plus his new food is expensive.)
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u/Warm-Day8313 1d ago
Gaud we lost another human to dis thing called “work”….. prairie Princess