i wish i had a bacon cheeseburger with no sauce or veggies on a plate in front of me

[u/PresenceHot3716]

[u/O37GEKKO]

granted,

you have a plate of veggies on a plate in front of you

[u/OnionTamer → u/O37GEKKO]

Grammar matters!

[u/Minetendo-Fan → u/O37GEKKO]

I don’t get it. What’s the loophole?

[u/yallivia → u/Minetendo-Fan]

Cheeseburger with bacon and no sauce OR veggies lmao

[u/Minetendo-Fan → u/yallivia]

OOOOOHHHHHHHH

[u/OnionTamer]

Granted, someone walks by with that exact plate, but it's theirs and they are going to eat it.

[u/AdvancedCelery4849]

Granted. It's just a really bad burger, no magical shenanigans.

[u/bag_of_hats → u/AdvancedCelery4849]

Somehow this is the most cursed outcome.

[u/Bladed_Burner]

The Finger Curls...

Sure thing sir. You're on death row now, so you can have anything you want for your last meal. 

[u/PresenceHot3716 → u/Bladed_Burner]

you're the only one who treated me fairly

[u/Pengdacorn → u/Bladed_Burner]

Nice! An actual monkeys paw response

[u/BussJoy → u/Bladed_Burner]

Not in Texas.

[u/korochi2106]

Granted Its in front of you but realy far somewhere in a straigth line in front of you

[u/Cheeseconsumer08]

Granted, It’s burned, not just the patty but the bacon and the cheese and the bun

[u/Bubbles_the_bird → u/Cheeseconsumer08]

And because of SpongeBob shenanigans, the drink is also somehow burned

[u/Gadgetphile → u/Bubbles_the_bird]

The drink is the burger.

[u/Apart_Middle_1570]

Granted, the plate is forever in front of you at the exact distance you cannot reach and moves accordingly

[u/JeffroCakes]

Granted. It’s vegan.

[u/dungeon-raided → u/JeffroCakes]

I've heard vegan replacements aren't so bad these days, I'd try it

[u/TearFit3918]

Granted but the beef is a little dry.

[u/GekkoGuu]

Granted! The burger is microscopic, and the plate falls and breaks

[u/ThisIsForNakeDLadies]

Granted.  As you start to pick your arms up to start eating, you feel half of your face go numb.  Suddenly you can't comprehend what even is in front of you, let alone speak about it.  Your arms are as heavy as lead.

You can see, but you can't speak or move.  

[u/Q-burt]

Granted. You have no arms with which to pick up and eat it.

[u/Niko0rSmthUhhIdk]

Granted. It spawned somewhere in Earth. Whether it’s in America or Antartica or anywhere else is a mystery. Good luck finding it before it expires

(It’s in a straight line from where you’re facing tho)

[u/OffBeatBerry_707]

Granted.

You get exactly what you want but the bacon is small and chewy, meat is undercooked, unseasoned, untoasted buns yet stale, the cheese unmelted and tastes awful, all around a 2/10 burger. Hell 0.1/10 because 2 is generous for how shite this bacon cheeseburger is.

And coincidentally your household has no condiments or seasonings in the cupboards.

[u/sum_r4nd0m_gurl]

granted you get a plate that has a bacon cheeseburger with no sauce or veggies painted on it

[u/venator1995]

Granted. It’s not cooked. Except the bacon. It’s also turkey bacon

[u/Gokudomatic]

Granted. You get a plate with a huge block of cheese between two slices of raw bacon.

[u/ScottyBBadd]

Granted, but it's peppered bacon and ghost pepper Jack cheese.

[u/KittenTehSmol]

Granted, you now owe $400 for the outrageously overpriced shipping service.

[u/Fusionsigh]

Granted but you cannot eat or touch it or look at it

[u/Hierophyn]

Granted but it’s all uncooked

[u/TheGuyNamedPablo]

Granted, tomatoes are considered fruit, so you still have tomatoes on the cheeseburger

actually same thing with pickles ig

[u/AldrusValus]

Yes, but it’s turkey bacon.

[u/Weak_Variety_1687]

Granted. the burger is 1000 miles away directly in front of you.

[u/EddtheMetalHead]

Granted. You die of a vitamin deficiency for not eating your vegetables.

[u/Forester___]

Granted

It’s cold 😔 

[u/SouthernWoodpecker40]

Granted. theres 1000000000 slices of bacon on the burger, you die from the bacon crushing you