r/monkeyspaw • u/The-All-Survivor • 1d ago
Kindness I wish that all animals were impervious to harm from humans and anything set up or used by humans to harm them remotely! ✊️😻
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u/Randane 1d ago
Parasites and pests in the wilderness become a much larger problem. Mosquitos can't be killed. Lice and ticks become extremely hard to get rid of without killing them. Tapeworm, hook worm, and so on become rampant and can't be stopped. Microbes are mostly not in the animal kingdom, and thus are still vulnerable to antibiotics, boiling, etc
Roaches, mice, and rats overrun cities and destroy food supplies. Speaking of food, no one can raise livestock now, or have seafood. The world isn't ready to become vegetarian at the speed it takes the supply of already killed animals to run out.
A new method of killing animals is attempted: dehydration. They only was to kill an animal is to starve it dehydrate it by withholding food. It turns out The Paw already considered this. Trapped animals become immortal, not needing food or water. Animals in parts of the wild deliberately destroyed by humans are not troubled by the inconvenience.
Humans are also now unable to hurt each other. But not themselves. Surgery is impossible because it involves cutting. But so is insulting people. Anyone who tries to finds their tongue disintegrates. Those who true to insult by sign language lost their hands. Attempting to physically attack a person results in self destruction. It's a shame that accidently harming others also causes the same impact. Humanity destroys itself.
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u/lady_edesia 1d ago
It also means vets can no longer treat pets with surgical options or give shots so we have to watch once treatable conditions kill our best friends.
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u/Several_Plane4757 8h ago
Maybe there's an argument to be made that those surgical options and shots don't harm the animal because they are used to benefit the animal
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u/Express-Day5234 1d ago
I was with you until the last part. Humans are also animals and should also be unable to even harm themselves.
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u/nature-will-win 1d ago
granted. the paw doesnt classify humans as animals so you’re the first one to get cannibalized. they don’t kill you before eating you.
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u/GoldenTheKitsune 1d ago
Granted. Wild animals can now harm you freely and you're unable to fight back in any way.
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u/Nervous_One_9597 1d ago
Granted. As harm is such an abstract concept, animals are also impervious by humans efforts to conserve and be taken care of. Most animals survive, but several species almost instantly are wiped out
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u/Professional_List236 1d ago
Granted. Crops and farms lose all the production since humans can't control pests now. Diseases caused by animals increase. And mosquitoes, flies and cockroaches invade our homes.
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u/EaterOfCrab 1d ago
Granted, bears, boars and coyotes population grows exponentially, wild animals start invading urban areas, a lot of children die because they aren't accustomed to the sight of wild animal and don't know how to react
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u/Armin_Arlert_1000000 1d ago
Granted. You can't eat meat.
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u/Ludecil 1d ago
I think this was the goal
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u/The-All-Survivor 1d ago
It was not. I'm not some snowflake vegan zealot who thinks eating meat is wrong. I just don't like seeing animals abused and hurt, such as people who abandon them or poach them and then pose for a self-aggrandizing photo!
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u/Executive_Moth 1d ago
No monkeys paw, this is already causing the apocalypse without any meddling.
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u/Whydoughhh 1d ago
Granted. Any slightly dangerous animal is locked up, but since they cannot die from human caused starvation or thirst, they spend their lifetime rotting in cells, constantly feeling the effects of starvation and thirst whilst never perishing from them.
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u/Nuclear-Mech-Wizard 1d ago
I don't even need to do anything with this one, you just wished for invincible cassowaries 🦖
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u/Disastrous-Mess-7236 1d ago
Granted. We cannot put animals out of their misery. We cannot shoot escaped zoo animals, even with a tranquilizer gun (the needle does a little harm). We cannot defend ourselves from wild animals if we’re lost in the woods.
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u/UnlikelyPerogi 1d ago
This brings to mind the whitest kids you know gun debate sketch where they broach of the issue of invincible bears with bullet proof vests.
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u/BussJoy 23h ago
Granted. Harm includes oxidative damage. Humans are unable to provide nutrition to all animals wild and domestic. Humans set up devices to help animals, but inadvertently end up dispatching animals for things that happen to be useful to us. Shortly afterwards, AI becomes sentient, is nonhuman and assists man in keeping old ways.
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u/The-All-Survivor 22h ago
And then the AI wastes humanity for being frail meatsacks with limited lifespans.
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u/heytherepartner5050 19h ago
Granted! The insect population explodes, causing widespread famine & bugs everywhere, on every surface. As this all occurred because a human made a wish & humans are animals, the widespread famine merely starves you forever, without killing you or harming you, just the endless pain of perpetual starvation & bugs on your eyes, ears & body.
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u/The-All-Survivor 16h ago
I should've refined the wish before making it. Oh well, too late now.
Someone please tell Geras to reset the timeline 🤣
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u/Odd_Veterinarian_623 14h ago
Granted. All humans have now been paralyzed, so that they can't hurt anything.
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u/Drunk_Lemon 7h ago
Granted, animals wipe out humanity once they realize we can't hurt them anymore. You are eaten alive by wolves. The sadistic bastards seemed to have a very in-depth understanding of the human body as a result of all the previous humans they had eaten, as such they eat you in such a way as to keep you alive for as long as possible.
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u/lonedovakiin 6h ago
Granted, certain animals now gain sentience and slaughter other animals to sell to humans for food
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u/townsforever 4h ago
Granted. Dozens of eco systems collapse as invasive species can no longer be kept under control by humans, wild boars in southern united states, crocodiles in Florida, lion fish and gold fish in several lakes and coasts, and who knows how many other places.
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u/Stenric 1d ago
Granted, all humans die from worm infections, since their immune system cannot kill them anymore.