r/monkeyspaw • u/gawsemand • 1d ago

Kindness I wish my dog would cuddle with me whenever i want him to

1 Upvotes

60% Upvoted

15 comments sorted by

5

u/Weak_Variety_1687 1d ago

He rolled in poop.

4

u/Panduzzy 1d ago

Granted.

Your dog suddenly grows out two big old beefy arms to cuddle you whenever you want

3

u/Odd_Veterinarian_623 1d ago

Granted. Your dog turns into a human and can now understand your commands.

3

u/Minetendo-Fan 1d ago

I SEE ABSOLUTELY NO DOWNSIDE

2

u/ApSciLiara 1d ago

Granted. However, he smells kinda bad.

......... I don't really have the heart to subvert this one. Congrats, you broke me!

3

u/Necessary_Coconut_47 1d ago

Granted. He cuddles with you whenever you want him to. He also jumps, sleeps, and moves whenever you want him to.

Essentially, your dog is now a doll...except that you remember when he had free will, and have to live with yourself for taking that away.

2

u/Megagamr 1d ago

Granted. Every time the dog cuddles you, he starts smothering you in his balls. You cannot spay him and if he already is spayed then they grow back

4

u/Minetendo-Fan 1d ago

What the fuck

1

u/Moranth2 1d ago

Granted. It doesn't matter where you are, the dog WILL cuddle with you. Bored at a business meeting and want to cuddle your dog? Sure, here it comes shattering the office window right into your lap. Because of this, you get fired from every job you join

2

u/gawsemand 1d ago

Perfect

1

u/TakingYourHand 1d ago

Granted. However, this won't stop after he dies, which will be from a car accident.

1

u/deIuxx_ 1d ago

Granted. He grows super sharp claws and accidentally injures you numerous times until you die

1

u/AdvancedCelery4849 1d ago

Granted. Your dog becomes an angsty teenager (only in personality) and never wants to cuddle.