r/rs_x • u/MasterDan118 • 2d ago
Being Alone at a Bar is Humiliating
There is something so humiliating about going to a bar alone. I am a little buzzed rn, so apologies if this sounds nonsensical. A magazine I subscribe to had their magazine launch party today at a bar. Subscribers get in free, plus ones had to pay. I consider myself to be a somewhat socially adept person. I have been to parties alone, but bars? Not often.
Everyone here seemingly knows each other. To break into a conversation seems to be like crashing a little private party. Each with their inside jokes and established relationships. The only person I spoke to tonight was a guy, about 42, about our jobs. And I really tried, I really did. I am sitting at the bar stand as people around me order drinks with their friends. The bartenders move left and right fulfilling orders. At least the drinks are free.
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u/No-Exchange-8087 2d ago
Take up smoking and you can make friends with the handful of other people who don’t care whether they live or die at bars
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u/ShonWalksAtMidnight 2d ago
100%, it's a filthy nasty habit I will admit, but between the pool tables and the smoke spot I've met many friends after moving to a town where I knew no one besides family. I felt very awkward going to the bar alone, it is indeed awkward, but you just gotta push through it.
Introduce yourself to strangers, don't feel bad about "crashing a little private party", insert yourself, that's what the bar is for, just pipe up and say something, be charming, don't be aggressive but make your presence known.
I've met so many cool people like I'm sure you are, I make a point to talk to people I see alone at the bar, because I know how it feels. I've got 3 buddies now from Germany, a roadie for the local county bar, a few women, all just by saying "Hi" essentially.
Just put yourself out there, my technique is kinda listening in and then making a witty comment about their conversation, it's worked many times, I'll do the same thing tonight with a woman I met by doing the same thing.
Get out there! Don't be a wallflower, I was for my first bit after moving, I literally brought a book and would sit in the corner. Which is fine, but it wasn't going to get me anywhere socially.
Insert yourself! The worst that can happen is it doesn't go anywhere, so what? Best it can happen you make new friends and relationships. I just got a Snapchat from one of my German friends today, I never would have if I didn't choose to introduce myself to her at the smoke spot because she was alone.
Tonight I'm going out and they'll be at least 4-5 regulars I know and will dap up and give them a hug and chill, it took some time but you can't make progress unless you keep pushing.
You got this bro!
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u/GutterTrashJosh 1d ago
You’re a solid guy, going this far out of your way to type this and give advice- nice to see people like you occasionally after how many negative twats there can be on this site/sub.
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u/MasterDan118 2d ago
Real and true. This is how I have done it the last couple of times, but I can’t say I enjoy it. It’s me asking others for a cigarette, but this is not a smoking type of event
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u/Waste-Public1899 1d ago
I know it can be a slippery slope with nicotine but you don’t even have to take up smoking. You can still bum a cigarette and start talking to people. I will admit it’s much easier as a man imo. Less threat of getting hit on if you strike up a random conversation. I’ve made friends in new places by first talking to the old drunk guys at the bar and spiraling outward from there. Again, not really viable as a woman so idk what to say about that.
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u/Ok-Ferret7360 2d ago
Going to a bar by yourself is one of the great pleasures of life. I have no idea what you are talking about.
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u/Getrekt_kid 2d ago
I think that's because this is more of an event than a night out. Launch parties, brand parties etc are a bit more daunting. I'd agree though, just asking someone what they're drinking is the easiest way to start talking. Especially if it's free drinks like in this case. But also sometimes just going out is like 80/20. Most of the time you'll meet people & enjoy the night & very few times you'll be back home wondering why you didn't just stay in
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u/Moarbrains 2d ago
Launch parties are for networking as far as I can tell. If you look at it as part of the job hustle then you won't be wasting time.
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u/DavidFree 2d ago
Practice makes perfect
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u/FreqTrade 1d ago
How does one practice if he has nothing to say?
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u/DavidFree 12h ago
Pretend you do.
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u/FreqTrade 12h ago
Again, how? Not one thing comes to mind.
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u/DavidFree 12h ago
Ask questions. Read a book. Take an improv class.
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u/FreqTrade 12h ago
I read a lot and have an improv class coming up. Questions about what?
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u/DavidFree 12h ago
Any questions that will get you an answer to the question of: what topic excites and energizes the person I'm talking to?
Good luck in the improv class. Go multiple times.
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u/FreqTrade 12h ago
It's four sessions.
But how can I know that if the person is a stranger? All I see is someone I know nothing about who might not even want to talk to me.
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u/DavidFree 12h ago
But how can I know that if the person is a stranger?
That's what the questions are for.
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u/es_muss_sein135 2d ago
can anyone in this comments section explain please how to talk to people at a bar
even when I go to things that aren't events how do you find people to talk to, if you're alone??? do you just talk to the bartenders? I really don't get it
I'm getting better at thinking of things to talk about with strangers mostly because I feel like I'm starting to have a better understanding of things in general, but actually starting a conversation when no one will even look at you is just not really possible
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u/jezx74 2d ago
If it’s not crazy busy you can usually chat with the bartenders, ask them how their night is going and stuff. It always depends on the vibe of the bar but try and make eye contact and smile/nod at other randos sitting alone to let them know you’re open to converse. Obviously if you’re a remotely attractive woman, that might have unintended consequences.
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u/es_muss_sein135 2d ago
I think that actually is the problem, I'm a very mid woman. So other women don't want to talk to me, only weird men lol. I will definitely try talking to bartenders though
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u/jezx74 2d ago
Ah yeah, makes sense. I’m a very obviously gay woman so men are usually happy to bro it up with me and other women don’t see me as a threat. But yea bartenders are almost always down to shoot the shit as long as they’re not busy. Good luck! You sound nice, I’d talk to you at a bar
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u/es_muss_sein135 2d ago edited 2d ago
That makes sense! Yeah, confidence and giving off comfortable vibes is probably key. Thank you :)
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u/Prestigious-Art-9758 2d ago
as a fellow mid woman who has trouble with this, try striking up convos with the middle aged townie ladies hanging out at the bar . I’ve always come out of this a little bit happier and with a better outlook on life. Once they get drunk they love to hype you up And are fun to do tequila shots with
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u/KantCancelMe 2d ago
Can't you just do that thing where you go like "Oh, I love your purse" or another disingenuous compliment just to get them talking to you?
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u/es_muss_sein135 2d ago
I feel like whenever I do this they either don't hear me or pretend not to hear me. To be fair, I don't do it very often. I guess I just assume automatic rejection from everyone. I think not doing that is probably the hard part. I feel like I'm actually decent at having conversations once it's established that the other person actually wants to talk to me.
I think this is probably why I've had very few female friends my entire life, I guess I just don't even try to meet or talk to people :( I never really thought of myself as a socially inept zoomer in that particular way before, but I guess it is true. I just didn't really know how other people had friends or something and, for most of my life, wrote it off as not important/not worth the time/not possible
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u/alittleornery 2d ago
its much easier as a girl tbh i only go to bars with dancefloors, if people see you're social and having a good time theyll definitely talk to you. there's ofc the bathroom too. ive made lots of friends that way lol
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u/ShonWalksAtMidnight 2d ago
Read my comment up top, you just introduce yourself, it's that simple.
A few months ago this cool looking guy came up alone to the smoke spot, so I just said "Hey brother, how you doing tonight" he replied with a noticable accent, so I pivoted that in to a "Where are you from" he's from Germany, in a metal band, working in town, we hung out all night, he visited again recently and made a point to hit me up and see me.
Talk to people! But more importantly, listen. I love to listen to people talk and ask questions, I was a bartender for 12 years, it definitely is a learned skill. But just talk, ask questions, listen to them, be interested, find common ground. It's easier than most people think.
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u/298347209384 2d ago
If you see someone by themselves then they are basically guaranteed to be happy to talk to you. Just walk up, ask if they come here often, or comment on what they're drinking or their outfit or something. If its two people you need a bit of context, but basically you're just trying to avoid interrupting a deep or emotionally charged conversation. If they're staring at each other intently then probably hold off, if their bodies aren't directly facing each other that's sort of an invitation for you to butt in.
Also if you go to a place with music and somewhere to dance, you can dance with people then strike a conversation with them afterwards and compliment their dancing.
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u/es_muss_sein135 1d ago
I think the main problem I have, based upon this thread, is that the bars that I go to suck. To be fair, I've usually gone on weekday nights (I think I've gone by myself a few times on weekend evenings but a little too early probably, like 8pm). But everytime I go, it seems like everyone is huddled in their own groups in a circle engrossed in the conversations they're having, and the only other people who are there by themselves are men in their 40s and 50s. I guess maybe I need to find somewhere better to go. There are some live music events happening regularly; I think I'll try going to those instead.
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u/itsprobablyghosts 1d ago
Find someone annoying and bond with someone else about how annoying they are
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u/Ok-Ferret7360 2d ago
You can start with the bartenders. But you sit down at the bar and just kinda ease into it. You hear what other people are talking about, you offer your opinion or insight, or you ask a question, etc., and if you are getting along you introduce yourself and go from there. It's like any other conversation.
Edit: Just read you are a woman so yes rules are different. My bad.
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u/gauxgauxdancer 2d ago
I'm alone at an airport bar and my flight is delayed and I don't need this right now!!!
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u/MasterDan118 2d ago
A woman waiting for a drink as I was writing this approached me asking what I was writing. I was straight up. We spoke for a good ten minutes, laughing, until she had to leave to meet with her plus one. No invite was given to join them, granted I could have asked too. I would have, but then she said that this is the first first time she sees her plus one in ten years
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u/PresinaldTrunt 2d ago
Hey that's still pretty cool!
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u/zouss 2d ago
Yeah if it was her first time seeing her friend in ten years it makes sense she wants one on one time to catch up. If a stranger is there, the vibe and discussion changes completely. It's cool (and funny timing) that she reached out, there will be others. How often do you go to bars alone anyway?
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u/MasterDan118 2d ago
About once a month or so. I try to bring a book with me, but this time I did not since it was a launch event. It's not that it was humiliating the fact that I was alone, more than I could not really approach anyone for the life of me. I suppose brining a book would have supressed those thoughts and I could have vibed with the free drinks
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u/zouss 2d ago
I get it, I struggle with that too. But tbh whenever I went to bars alone in my drinking days I tended to want to be left alone lol. If you're looking to meet people, I'd recommend checking out meetups. It's much easier to strike a conversation when you know everyone came to meet new people
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u/exteriorcrocodileal gives bad advice 2d ago
Conventional drinking norms don’t apply in or around airplanes, you good
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u/Moarbrains 2d ago
I got to airport bars just to watch people getting on and off planes. I don't really enjoy drinking too much on flying days, wears me out.
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u/CitrusflavoredIndia 1d ago
Airport bar isn’t really the same. Every single person is traveling through
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u/DadAnalyst 2d ago
I’m at the bar alone right now and this shit rules
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u/ANEMIC_TWINK 2d ago
why u on ur phone then
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u/birchzx 2d ago
God forbid a man scrolls
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u/Moarbrains 2d ago
Go watch the show cheers and then imagine if everyone one was on their phone instead.
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u/tacetmusic 2d ago
Go watch the show cheers and then imagine that there are TVs all around the bar.
Now imagine those TVs are showing the show cheers.
Now imagine on that show cheers if everyone
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u/Axariel 2d ago
Yeah, I am borderline nonfunctional without a plus one. I am also not sure that I could start or intrude upon a conversation with anyone if the only basis for that conversation is our having a magazine subscription in common...
Unless it was Hot Rod magazine because I love talking about cars and treating them like furniture for a photoshoot. /s
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u/Early_Lifeguard_5875 2d ago
I went to a bar alone. Ended up striking up a nice conversation with 2 young women and their dog. They're transplants to the area and I just gave them advice on local restaurants and such. We're going to get lunch and go to the beach tomorrow. I just made 2 friends. I'm an unattractive, fat guy who isn't particularly funny or likable. All it took was being kind and curious about their lives. I promise most people want friendship. It just takes being open.
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u/Early_Lifeguard_5875 2d ago
I will also say that if you're a dude it's important not to seem like you're at the bar prowling for women. Just be cool and friendships will naturally evolve. Sometimes these will result in sexual relationships. Often they won't. Either way you've met a new person and had a good conversation. Just don't overthink it
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u/jaydeewar84 2d ago
A magazine launch party seems like a pretty specific event to equate with the entire “going to bars alone” experience. I’ve had a lot of fun at the bar alone. Go in just expecting to relax and people watch and anything more is a fun bonus adventure, however short. Generally, on any regular night, a bar would have at least a handful of other people with similarly open and curious intentions.
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u/GLADisme 2d ago
It's only humiliating if you act humiliated.
People go to drink by themselves all the time, for some people It's all they do. 95% of people won't notice you, the other 5% won't care. If you're sitting there neurotically trying to look normal, people will notice.
I'll admit it's more awkward on weekends and when there's lots of groups of people around, but just own your space and act natural.
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u/inevertoldyouwhatido 2d ago
I go to bars alone all the time and am a bartender myself. I promise you it’s fine and it just takes a little practice/getting lucky with chatty people around you :)
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u/LesCactus 2d ago
You went to a private/closed door magazine launch with open bar, and I'm assuming something like a literary magazine or art/architecture related which means everyone there knows each other cause of the niche group / industry they are a part of. This is nowhere near the same as going to a bar alone.
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u/thomastypewriter 2d ago edited 2d ago
Seems like every month some zoomer visits a bar alone for the first time and posts here about how scared and abnormal it makes them feel and how they need validation for doing it.
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u/GoingWeste 2d ago
Depends on the bar but yeah it sucks thats why I stopped going lol
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u/CitrusflavoredIndia 1d ago
Like most things in life it’s just luck of the draw with the people you’re sitting beside.
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u/TheKingofFumes 2d ago
It’s really not dude, you have no idea how many people go to the bar alone after work or just for fun. Once you realize this, the world is yours.
Godspeed, don’t over think it
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u/teatreachor 2d ago
Probably going to a bar alone tonight to drink NA shit for 3 hours and stare at groups of young people. If I don’t feel pathetic then you shouldn’t either.
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u/SameAsThePassword 2d ago
Man if you don’t even drink maybe it’s time to find new hobbies.
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u/teatreachor 2d ago
I have hobbies. One of them is being alone in a loud social environment and dissociating.
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u/CitrusflavoredIndia 1d ago
As someone who loves bars in all forms I couldn’t imagine going there alone to drink NAs
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u/ANEMIC_TWINK 2d ago
go watch a game. if u go to the pub when a games on theres tons of other lonely saddos u can meet.
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u/doobiemoth 2d ago
I feel like being at a bar alone is more chill than a party bc parties usually have coexisting social groups at them where bars are more random.
Also I promise you nobody is looking at you or cares what you’re doing. In the kindest way possible lol.
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u/byherdesign 2d ago
Yeah I serve tables and don't bat an eye at someone sitting alone at a bar or table. I respect it. Least they're outta the house not doom scrolling
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u/you_and_i_are_earth 2d ago
I wish they didn't set mirrors behind the bar, cause I can't stand to look at my face when I don't know where you are.
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u/thethiefstheme 2d ago
I think people aren't really used to being alone with their thoughts. The truth is nobody really cares about you being alone, the only one being humiliated is you by your own insecurities.
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u/cheapMaltLiqour 2d ago
Bro ive never once been at a bar and saw someone and thought "is this dude alone lol!" Ive never had a friend point out someone by themselves either. Honestly someone by themselves sitting at the bar is very classic, very american, very cool.
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u/MagicAndClementines 2d ago
ITS NOT IF YOU BRING A BOOK! I cannot stress this enough. Anywhere you go alone, bring a book. It shows you're there intentionally, not sitting around waiting for someone, and you're enjoying you're own company. I love visiting my local cocktail lounge, with a book or my laptop to write, and I just enjoy the vibes.
Sorry you had a tough night though OP. Sending mental hugs and/or high fives your way.
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u/MasterDan118 2d ago
It's just interesting - I have not felt like this in a long time. I feel like I thrive more in parties because it is just more collective event you know.
On your first point, I do bring a book to a bar alone, but this time, for the first time in a long time, I just did not and ended up staring at the mirror for like 2 hours. Not counting of course those 2 other social interactions which were perfectly fine
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u/earthlike_croak 2d ago
It's the fact that it's a magazine launch party, that it's in a bar is not the problem.
They're the worst. They're on the periphery of whatever literary/cultural scene the magazine relates to, but everything is a little more heightened and bourg. Much more of a careerist bent than the messy creative weirdo crowd you might find at actual literary/poetry/music events, instead it's a patchwork of little carrie Bradshaw larper groups.
My rule of thumb is that if the magazine is so big that I can't just walk up to the editors and chat, or I'm not on a "catch up in the smokers area friend" basis with someone who was published, it really isn't a good idea to go.
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u/MasterDan118 2d ago
Yeah, thinking about it more, I really should have known better. I thought it would have been more lowkey because my impression was that it was a smaller mag
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u/kulturkampf_account 2d ago
I rarely go to bars, and virtually every time I do go it's because I'm going to some event or whatever nearby either before or after, and some of the time that means I'm alone. I sit at the bar, order a drink, make some small talk with the bartender if they aren't busy and/or no one else is around, and then typically say hey and talk to anyone else sitting at the bar around me
If I was at a bar alone and I was there for an event at the bar, in this case a magazine launch, I'd talk to anyone and maybe everyone just by being like "oh shit do you subscribe to The Magazine too?" and use our evident shared interest in that to start a conversation
I've also found that if you're at an event alone and other people are in the bar area just hanging, it's not hard to be like "yo you guys are into The Thing too? I'm here alone because I'm the only one of my friends into this stuff" and then sometimes a whole group of friends or whatever will start talking to you and even sometimes adopt you as part of the crew for the night if you come across as chill
Like hanging out getting a drink at a concert and asking people if they've seen the band live before, or like at a film festival asking people how they got into the director whose work is screening etc. and then mentioning I'm alone either because I'm traveling from out of town for the event or because my friends didn't want to go or whatever always seems to work
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u/coldhyphengarage 2d ago
Being alone at a bar is great if you’re just trying to chill alone and have some drinks outside of your home. If your goal is to meet other people, then yes that ship has sailed
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u/nino2115 2d ago
Just vibe bro. Even if it's by yourself, there's 0 pressure. You don't have to do anything. No one will look at you as an odd ball as long as your just chilling
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u/Ok_Figure7858 2d ago
I’d go more if every woman wasn’t fat at the weirdo bar I go to. It sucks that normie chicks so much more often take care of their appearance and diet. God forbid a weird chick has a flat stomach, know what I’m saying guys? But I’m serious
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u/Prestigious-Art-9758 2d ago
I know this is seen as really lame and socially unacceptable to do / pick me behavior, but a lot of times when I’ve brought a book to a bar someone will ask me about it and that will start a conversation. Also if you just keep going you’ll eventually recognize familiar faces. Are there really no other people alone at the bar? Find a divey place where this is more common
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u/daddyvow 2d ago
Why do you feel that way? It’s awesome. I’ve had a lot of cool conversations and have made friends this way.
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u/urbworld_dweller 2d ago
No it isn’t. You feeling humiliated and your self consciousness changes your aura and then people act accordingly.
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u/Alarmed-Lettuce9120 2d ago
i’m 29. i always go to bar by myself and just sit and finish my drink. never felt humiliating
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u/jeremybeadleshand 2d ago
I just got back from a trip to the US and met so many people hanging out at bars alone. In the UK that's less common as we don't really sit at the bar, you generally go up to order then sit at a table, so it was very novel to me.
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u/intoTheNight83 2d ago
100% love going to a bar by myself. I’ve been doing it since I was 21, pushing 40 now. I love the observational aspect of it. Taking in the atmosphere is a joy for me. Even if I only speak to the bartender. There’s no shame in it just like there’s no shame grabbing a meal by yourself.
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u/Wooden-Committee4495 2d ago
Just walk up, slap a dude on the shoulder and in a jocular manner, ask, “aren’t iPods crazy?!”
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u/Worried_Midnight_971 2d ago
Yeah but, you gotta keep doing it. One night alone at a bar and your a weirdo. Show up every Friday, for a month and you're a regular and the bartender knows your name and your order
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u/Interesting-Tap6695 2d ago
Me bc I have no idea where to direct my eye gaze or where to look bc I don’t want to stare at ppl without realizing or look weird lmfao . Like if you want to be approached they say to not be on your phone, ok so then where specifically should I look if I’m not in those few minutes making convo or finishing my drink
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u/wexpyke 2d ago
depends on the bar and the night tbh
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u/CitrusflavoredIndia 1d ago
Really it depends who sits beside you. Could be some friendly guy who breaks the conversation barrier or a complete weirdo
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u/Totally_Not_A_Fed474 2d ago
Just got back from going to my favorite bar alone, maybe it’s different if there’s a big event like that but I was able to strike a conversation with someone within an hour and took it from there. Didn’t even drink for the last few hours since I was already being social so I didn’t feel the need 🤷♀️
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u/ahor18 2d ago
I actually prefer going to bars alone. Sometimes you don’t talk to anyone, sometimes you make very strange and real connections. Sometimes you make a drunk best friend that wouldn’t even recognize you the next day. But every time you will get turned down by a girl. Joking. You will not solve your problems at a bar, but if you stop caring what people think they will actually admire the fact that you can be confident and content by yourself. A superpower you can only get by embracing the initial awkwardness and rolling with it.
“Everybody’s gotta believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.” -WC Fields
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u/ahor18 2d ago
I actually prefer going to bars alone. Sometimes you don’t talk to anyone, sometimes you make very strange and real connections. Sometimes you make a drunk best friend that wouldn’t even recognize you the next day. But every time you will get turned down by a girl. Joking. You will not solve your problems at a bar, but if you stop caring what people think they will actually admire the fact that you can be confident and content by yourself. A superpower you can only get by embracing the initial awkwardness and rolling with it.
“Everybody’s gotta believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.” -WC Fields
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u/Marissa310 2d ago
As a bartender, going to the bar alone is completely normal, and extra based if you’re a woman.
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u/SlowSwords 2d ago
We did this thread like a week ago. Just drink and vibe. If it’s not your scene then have a couple and bounce man.
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u/kitterkatty 2d ago
I’d go just to eat pretzels drink something delicious until the room gets soft and fuzzy and listen to norm and cliff for an hour. Why are you expecting people to care about you lol enjoy the atmosphere
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u/Waste_Explanation410 2d ago
I love being alone at the bar. Just sit & sip in silence and watch people laugh their lives away.
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u/get_a_lawyer_ 2d ago
Do you struggle being alone with yourself? Work on that first, it’s so liberating.
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u/spacejamisraw 2d ago
It depends what kind of bar you’re at so I empathize with you if you’re at a college aged bar where you’re the odd man out or it’s more a party atmosphere.
But the vast majority of bars you can just chill by yourself and have a good convo or two.
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u/heighthon 2d ago
Hey I used to feel this when I started going to bars. Turned out the crowd at those kinda places wasn't rly for me. But by persisting and going to them, I eventually met someone there who brought me into more interesting social circles that did align with my interests.
You just gotta go into it knowing who you're trying to be. It's totally okay and even productive to close yourself off to people who seem like you wouldn't want to talk to them. In fact, you can even keep track in your mind of people who you see there regularly who you'd like to talk to at some point
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u/Zal0phus The beleaguered law student 1d ago
Secretly hoping that hot people will hit on you as a solitary bar attendee is humiliating. Going to a bar by yourself is a simple pleasure of life
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u/_yeahdawg 1d ago
The few times i've gone to a bar alone the only people who approached me were couples looking for a third
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u/SlickJamesBitch 1d ago
I do not see how it’s humiliating. I see people at bars alone all the time and just think they didn’t have anything to do so went out to get a drink.
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u/WordHobby 1d ago
I go to a bar alone like 3 times a week to get a beer after work. After 2-3 weeks I kinda knew the regulars by name. Generally bar goers are lonely losers (hence they're at a bar) and are excited for more lonely losers to engage with. Literally sit at the bar doing nothing and someone will probably come up and talk to you idk.
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u/Terrible-Item-6293 1d ago
I love going to bars and music events alone because then I can do what I want without worrying about the needs of the group lol.
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u/sadboysummer365 1d ago
It’s one of the most powerful aura things you could do. Get a hold of yourself.
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u/WOLF_Drake 1d ago edited 1d ago
Intimacy is, by nature, private. Extra-Social situations with strangers lead to contagion and resource interest. Psycho illness is reified by psychological contagion of contradictory competitive social strategies. You need multitudes to choose not to enforce certain social mores, and over time they'll fall away. Getting mansplained to constantly must be it's own brand of comedic shared female experience. It's getting more common for more hip and happening places to go for more intimate dj sets, where the dj is in the middle of the room. I think this crowd dynamic where it's only like a dozen people front-to-back does a lot of heavy lifting improving any given lounge/bar or whatever you're describing.
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u/Top-Ruin-9567 1d ago
Bruh what? Going to the bar solo dolo is one of life’s simplest pleasures. Release yourself from the judgement of other people and enjoy a cold, freshly poured pint and watch some random sport you don’t care abt on the TV while the music plays and you order a shit cheeseburger. Be happy
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u/Capital_Shock_1000 1d ago
I've been wanting to go but I don't drink alcohol which adds more anxiety to it. Thinking about it makes me feel so fake or like I'm somewhere I shouldn't belong.
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u/PiscesAndAquarius 19h ago
I've done this. Try going to a ladies night at a gay bar alone. Talk about cliques.
I talked to one older lady and left. Young women in groups scare me.
-1
u/lasion2 1d ago
No, it’s not.
You are an insecure boob.
1
u/deadrawkstar 1d ago
Don’t diss someone who’s feeling down. If you can’t put yourself in the OPs shoes say NOTHING.
521
u/Permanenceisall 2d ago
No it’s not at all. Good lord get a hold of yourself and own your patch of metaphysical land. I’m a dive bar bartender, I see it all the time, it’s rarely pathetic, it’s never humiliating.