r/rs_x • u/bollerwig • 1d ago
⭐⭐⭐ سُورِيَا Who here has dated a hippy? Let's commiserate together
I'm probably coming to the end of a short lived relationship with a hippy. I went into it wondering if this is the worst idea in the world and I can now confirm that yes, it was.
When I first started dating him, I was describing him to a friend and she said ''Don't take this the wrong way but you basically just described a cult leader''. I laughed it off but that comment stuck in my mind. Then I read a comment on some post that said ''Never trust a guy who does fire spinning'' such a random thing to say but my boyfriend does this so again, alarm bells. I quickly started to realise that all his soul searching and supposed enlightenment was being used to excuse selfishness and an overall lack of self control. All his spiritual growth seemed very centered on the self.
Well now I've learned my lesson. Turns out he is just like all the other men I've been with but he has managed to slightly cover up his selfishness and sexism under a pile of spiritual mumbo jumbo. The more I talked about feminist issues, the more I saw how ignorant and dismissive he is to other people's experiences. Sad.
Goodbye my misogynistic Syrian hippy prince. 💔
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u/SaltSpecialistSalt 1d ago
I never dated a hippy but met and interacted with a lot. apart from a few they are the most arrogant, self absorbed, rude people i ever came in contact in my life.
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u/bo0oo66 1d ago
Yes one of my best romances ever tho, having weird pseudo tantric sex was spiritual healing ngl, rly undid the sex negative shit/self conscious Protestant behavior I learned from my partner before him. No one has worshipped my body like that and vice versa.
Guys try not to cum and edge going at it multiple times a day for long periods and worship the eternal feminine fr
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u/bollerwig 1d ago
I have to say the sex was a positive. I had experienced tantra alone before but it's incredibly intense and beautiful with another person. And I love being worshipped. I'm glad it was a good experience for you. Maybe I could give hippies another go eventually.
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u/ndork666 1d ago
I'm also a neurotic eternally attracted to free spirits. It's a tale as old as time, but man is it frustrating.
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago
Anyone who claims to have had an “ego death” or is “enlightened” Is lying through their teeth and probably has a lot of Skelton in their closet. Everyone’s flawed, everyone has an ego the best people admit that and try their best to manage it.
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u/fre3k 1d ago
Should probably distinguish between temporary and permanent ego death. Ego death from meditation or drugs is a temporary state of mind.
A claim of having destroyed the ego permanently is almost certainly utter quackery.
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago edited 1d ago
It’s all bullshit mate everyone’s got an ego. No amount of drugs, meditation or reading un dose nature
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u/Sad_Masterpiece_2768 1d ago
Take way too many magic mushrooms and report back.
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago edited 1d ago
I have. Done a lot of psyches in my day, dmt, shrooms acid ect. if you wanna think you’re operating on some higher level because you took some drugs that’s cool you’ll never convince me though.
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u/Sad_Masterpiece_2768 1d ago
Definitely don't think that but I think zoinking yourself on enough drugs can make you temporarily lose your sense of self. It's moreso forgetting a basic human attitude than it is enlightenment, regardless it's an interesting experience. I had enough to get to that stage by accident and I doubt I'd ever have gone that far voluntarily. I'm ultimately glad I did but it's not something I'm looking to do again.
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago
Haha yeah that’s true. Totally get that, every time I’ve done acid I’ve said never will I do that again.
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u/WolIilifo013491i1l 1d ago
i mean ive definitely had a k hole and experienced ego death, as have many others. its temporary though obviously, it doesnt mean anything permanent has shifted in the brain
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u/Junior-Air-6807 1d ago
Still, you would have to think an experience like that would change you fundamentally on some level, even if it doesn’t necessarily make you a “better person”.
People are a product of their experiences, and taking a high dose of psychedelics or dissociatives is one of the most intense, spiritually jarring experiences imaginable. The only thing that tops it is like having a kid or falling in love or something
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago
Yeah so it’s not really an ego death youve just fucked yourself on drugs lol
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u/WolIilifo013491i1l 1d ago
What are you talking about? It is a temporary ego death... what do you think ego death means?
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u/ReasonForClout 1d ago
there's nothing more impossible for a redscare user than at least reading the wikipedia page before forming a rock-solid conviction
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago
You can’t temporarily kill anything deaths final as far as we know. Not an ego death you were just totally inhibited because you took too many drugs.
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u/WolIilifo013491i1l 1d ago
you're not literally killing anything. you just dont know what the term "ego death" means clearly
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u/jerrys_biggest_fan 1d ago
The ones that are actually enlightened keep it on the down low lol. Talking about that shit is social suicide
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u/bollerwig 1d ago
I just learned he has gotten a bad reputation in some circles lol I assume creepy or arrogant behavior
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u/duly-goated303 1d ago
Yeah gotta be cautious of anyone who really trys to push a certain image of themselves. More often then not they’re hiding somthing or are having trouble coming to terms with themselves. Anyway hope you’re done with him plenty of genuinely good blokes out there you’ll find the right one eventually. All the best.
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u/Available-Escape 1d ago edited 17h ago
There are unfortunately more evil neurotic hippies out there as opposed to the endearing ones who mind their business (rarer to stumble upon in the wild). New Agers in general should be carefully assessed before anyone decide to casually interact with them. At least he wasn't a starseed, so there's that.
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u/makk73 1d ago
Yeah.
But ultimately the only real thing is that she was using the whole spiritual grift as an excuse to abandon any semblance of hygiene or grooming and mostly just smelled bad.
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u/siiouxsiie 18h ago
This is bizarre to me.
We live in an RV, I sell flowers out of an old Volkswagen, and I dress a little eccentric sometimes. I joke that I’m a walking stereotype, and most people agree!
But certain people are surprised when they find out I live in an RV because I wash myself like a normal person and I’m put together! The van life stereotypes kinda suck but, I gotta say, looking at my fellow sitemates…they’re earned.
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u/Chemical_Use_5241 15h ago
How is the RV life going for you? I've been thinking about getting one
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u/siiouxsiie 14h ago
I really love it! It’s almost been a year since we moved into it. We live in a 5th wheel, so we’re stationary for the moment. Draining the tanks is the one task I dread, but that’s absolutely not something we can put off lmao.
Clutter can pile up very quickly, but on the other hand, it’s very quick to clean!
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u/Cinnamon_Shops 23h ago
In high school I dated a hippie girl who would rub tangerine skins on herself in lieu of showering (tbf she didn’t really smell bad). But her “love and light” vibe became too much for me (especially since it sounded kinda phony) and I broke up with her by telling her that I was gay.
I sometimes feel like I’m the hippie bf (listens to a lot of jam bands, used to live in Asheville, has done a bunch of psychedelics)
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u/TrickyProtection6797 1d ago
some of them stink because they rub crystals on their pits out of aluminum fear
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u/flyingknot 21h ago
If they stink, it's not because of the crystal deodorant. Crystal deodorant is super high in aluminium content which is why it's effective for most.
Unless you meant literal stones which I have never heard of lol
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u/bambi_eyed_ faildaughterposting 22h ago
Been there. He was a model level gorgeous dude who lived in his car. On his way to our first date he took a “shower” in some sprinklers in a field. We once went out into the middle of the desert and spent a night under the stars after doing some geode hunting, then woke up at sunrise to find ourselves surrounded by a pack of wild horses. He was the living embodiment of that Nat King Cole song, “Nature Boy.” Ultimately he floated off into the world on his next adventure and I ended up moving away and meeting a very stable man to spend my life with, but I’ll always treasure the magical carefree time we spent together and the impact it had on me.
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u/luckyrabbit28 1d ago
not me but my best friend dated a few. one was a trustafarian who said he didn't 'believe' in money, hitchiked everywhere, and did drugs all the time everywhere. he had no sense of danger in the way you see a lot in privileged kids. another really gave cult leader vibes, would always eat all the food in our house, was poly (ofc), he groomed a vulnerable 16 year old boy, got my friend pregnant. anyway, now he lives alone in the forest in some abandoned building, coming to terms with what he's done over the years.
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u/thallydraper 18h ago
I've always felt kind of uneasy around hippies. The best of them of are just chaotic sweeties, but some of them are selfish babies who weren't raised right and can't properly navigate social life.
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u/Unlikely-Friend444 Noticer of Things 1d ago
I don’t even know where to begin. I used to date this they/them furry/hippy chick. We were together for like two months before they broke up with me because they realized they were a lesbian. Fair enough. It sucked, but whatever. Then, out of nowhere, they hooked up with a guy triple their age and they all went to Burning Man together.
What low self-esteem does to a MF.
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u/SoFullOfHope 1d ago
Mentally ill bullet dodged.
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u/Unlikely-Friend444 Noticer of Things 1d ago
I still feel really bad for her she's hot AF and tends to attract a lot of bad actor's nowadays we talk here and there seems like she's doing a bit better.
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u/Fart_Smell_Addict 23h ago
Your insight reminds me of some experiences I have had with a graduate of the Landmark Forum programs (which grew out of hippy-dippy seminars of est). For all their talk of honesty and self-actualization, the end result seems to be a rationalization of selfishness that other people pay the price for. The Landmark graduate adopts a mode of personal empowerment that pre-decides in favor of the self at the expense of in-the-moment negotiation of the relationship. Everyone else is secondary, a spectator to the student’s newly enlightened mode of being.
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u/thomastypewriter 22h ago
then I read a comment on a post
Damn people really let their romantic relationships be defined by stuff strangers say offhandedly on the internet?
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u/serene_queen_777 19h ago
I too have a chip on my shoulder for Aquarius men but I draw the line at fire spinning
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u/hanging_gigachad420 scheming bisexual 49m ago
One girl I dated in college was a Jewish hippie from VT who would drag me to the most insufferable folk punk shows and would inevitably end up in long conversations with homeless people. She gave amazing blowjobs though. Never go with a hippie to a second location
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u/konkybong 1d ago
The love of my life started out as a hippy. In a jam band, vegan, broke, etc. he got over all that stuff years later and mostly just loves sex and I have to listen to the dead sometimes. But also he’s not a spiritual hippie and grew up very catholic so we kinda have that in common. He also doesn’t do drugs anymore, but has done them in the past which I like because I could still talk about it with him and he’s not prudish about it, but I’ve never seen him drunk or fucked up on drugs in 7 years.
The key is he’s from the country which is more endearing and innocently stupid hippy types. Metropolitan hippies are mostly evil.