2 months + ADHD burnout and paralysis

[u/ThenRelation5188]

I was considering putting this under tips and suggestions but I am scared of being attacked but am very much open to friendly and helpful tips and suggestions. Anyways since around end of January, I have been stuck in bed. My will to do anything at all is completely gone and all I do is sit in bed, either researching random topics, doomscrolling or rotting away watching tv. Any routine that I once had, like even as simple as waking up and getting out of bed to make breakfast is gone. I don’t end up eating until the afternoon when I realize that I haven’t eaten all day. I rarely even brush my teeth (I know NASTY pls don’t yell at me), let alone do my schoolwork.

I am in my junior year of high school and am incredibly behind in school, failing almost all my classes. I honestly love learning and before my burnout I was an A and B student, but I tend to procrastinate and overwhelm myself with too many things and that I just completely shut off and do nothing. But this is the first time it has gotten this bad and now it’s April and am still bed rotting. Going back to school seems so scary now that I have been gone for so long and I haven’t done any work.

I feel like I’ve disappointed everyone in my life, my parents, my teachers and even my peers. The missing work feels like an impossible mountain to climb. On top of this it takes me double the time to get the work done in the first place because I am always getting distracted and am also a perfectionist. Even when I am doing my work, I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt because it takes me so long and I waste so much time in the process. I’m not sure how to get back into living a normal life and having a normal routine and just simply taking care of myself. It all feels so impossible and I feel like no one in my life gets it and they all think I’m just lazy. Everyday I spend in bed I grow more and more miserable and yet I am not sure how to escape it.

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[u/PerseveringPanda]

First off much empathy, love and solidarity for what you are going through. The shame you're describing sounds quite intense and that's really difficult on its own, not to mention the other stuff.

You're definitely describing symptoms of burnout. For any high performing or high functioning ADHD or ASD person this is Completely Normal!!!! It will happen to most people with adhd at some point in their life. My burnout periods in retrospect were 2-3 years covering the end of HS and college and 2-3 more after my second kid was born right before covid

Reposting some of what I have shared in the past, but in the very immediate, short term, your need for rest supersedes anything else (this plus having adhd and being overwhelmed is possibly why you are paralyzed)

The primary things to do are to love and be gentle with yourself, rest as much as possible, reduce or drop as many commitments in your life that are feasibly possible (especially open-ended ones) and give yourself extra credit for anything you do manage to accomplish because everything is several times harder right now.

Eat well and rest lots with some daily movement or exercise mixed in (to the extent this is possible for you).

Feel free to DM

[u/ThenRelation5188 → u/PerseveringPanda]

thank you so much this is definitely some of the best advice I’ve gotten! it’s nice to know I’m not alone in this because recently I have been doubting myself a lot and worrying that maybe I don’t have adhd and I’m just a lazy person like so many people in my life think I am. It sucks because when i am burnt out it genuinely feels like I can’t do anything and I just isolate and lose my will to actually live and not just rot. What I wish my teachers could understand is I’m not enjoying this time I’ve spent doing nothing because I am plagued with guilt about everything else that I should be doing. Sometimes i feel like my life will always feel this hard but this helped me remember that this is just a period that will eventually pass, I just have to remember to stay strong and celebrate every little task as a real accomplishment.