I rage quit my job of many years 16 months ago, the last straw being my boss telling me I was “insubordinate” for using FMLA to escort my crippled father to a doctor’s appointment, six months after the health incident that crippled him.
I’m laying in bed this morning and my phone vibrates. I check the number and see it’s the HR number for my former employer. It’s also about an hour before the HR department started their day when I was there, so rather ofd.
I answer, and the woman on the other end doesn’t give her name, instead saying “This is [Name of former employer] from Employee Services,” so it sounds like the anthropomorphic personification of my former employer works in HR and is calling me.
My first thought is that this is related to a job application I put in weeks ago with a sister company of the business that owned my previous employer. My former employer is notorious for rehiring people who should never be rehired, including someone whose stupidity almost caused a fire in a building that could have spread to where patients are treated.
I figured applying to the other company might be possible. Instead, I found out that people who almost racked up a body count are rehireable, while people who use FMLA have their personal external account blackmarked through every company owned by the parent business so it gets locked if they ever apply again, complete with a pop-up telling them their account is now locked.
But it wasn’t about that.
I was informed they were cleaning out my “personal effects” and needed to confirm my shipping address. After I did so Little Miss Anthropomorphic Representation lets out the most exasperated noise and complains how “Facilities or somebody” is cleaning out my desk and so she was put upon to contact me. Then she hangs up.
Here’s the thing. About a year before I quit I made sure I had no personal effects at the facility. I had seen what a half-ass job they’ve done in the past returning stuff to people, including just throwing out stuff of people they didn't like, and knew whenever I left I was unlikely to get my stuff back.
I’m honestly left wondering if someone got laid off or fired recently, they somehow got confused with me, and I’m going to get whatever they left behind. When I was there I was mistaken for other employees, both male and female, so often you’d have thought you were watching a sitcom.
I guess I’ll find out whose stuff I’m getting when the surprise package arrives.