Most of them I had ordered on the library website and just kept picking up more and more books until I looked at my account one day and I had about 80 books checked out, stacked around my room lol. It felt like they gave me some kind of power, I couldn't get myself to return them until the library was emailing and calling me about it.

I don't drive, and I was too paranoid about it to ask my one of my parents to drive me, so I remember several trips sneakily hauling bags and my backpack full of months-overdue books to the book return chute after hours, because i was afraid of the library employees for some reason lol

Mooo-d stabilizers.

last slide is Pinterest calling me out ((:

More OC ✨✨✨

Smh

brb looking at college programs/doctorates/phd's/whatever (i didn't even do high school bc my mental health was dogshit and i couldn't learn) and trying to schedule my day to work out 2 or 3 times a day and convince them to stop my meds so i can stay up until 4 or 5am and Do Things or try to plan my coaching business for when I get certified or make extremely detailed plans for my future i'll never look at again and try to write the novels i planned years ago and for them to let me out of the hospital longer so i can walk around for hours listening to my Motivational Playlist that will somehow manifest me to be highly intelligent and successful and everyone will love me and i'll be an awesome team leader and first responder (paramedic and firefighter and simultaneously in medical school AND nursing school AND massage therapy AND kinesiology) and spending all my money on anything and everything remotely related to my new goals (ie courses and resources i will probably look at once and forget about it until the cycle repeats) and somehow convince myself i'm extremely knowledgeable in all fields and will ace exams i never studied for and am nowhere near ready to even look at and i will be the best, most knowledgeable person in the whole hospital. AND working 2-3 jobs while doing all of this (i'm literally out of a job and waiting for my medical leave money application to go thru) (i'm literally in the psych ward and don't know when i'm leaving) (but i'm literally the best patient and deserve every ounce of freedom because i am Ready and they all love me)

I hear: Laughter is the best medicine ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)