[L] I’m relapsing in every single way and I’m all alone

[u/BrushFrequent1128]

TW: substance abuse and self harm

My mental health has been going downhill since the start of this year. First, I became dependent on Xanax again after being off it for 1 year, then I relapsed with alcohol after being sober almost 2 years, now I’m feeling like self harming after being clean for 3 years. It’s like all my demons are starting to come back and haunt me. It feels awful. I’ve reached out to my family a few times asking for some support but they just continue to be horrible to me. I’ve also told my therapist everything but he just ignored it. Is it really too much to just ask for some kindness 😞 it would help so much

[u/selfdestructingin5]

Don’t be too hard on yourself. The path isn’t always perfect. You realize how bad falling back is. That’s progress from where you were. Be happy at your progress. Know that you aren’t the same as you were anymore. You don’t have to completely slip back all of your bad habits because you slid a little in one. Your progress isn’t “2 years ____” that’s just a made up thing for you to keep track for whatever reason. The real progress isn’t quantifiable but a real change in yourself. Sometimes we stumble a little and stand back up straight again and keep going. Life is hard, I know. It can be as beautiful as you allow it to be though.

[u/AutoModerator]

Hello BrushFrequent1128,

Welcome to the /r/KindVoice community. We're glad you are here.

We'd like you to be aware of a few things in addition to making this post:

1.) Please make sure that you read the rules here.

2.) You can comment on posts where people are offering their kind voices. These posts are usually denoted with an [O].

3.) If you do talk to someone from KV, and you'd like to leave feedback (positive or negative) you can message the moderators.

4.) If you have Discord, you are welcome to join our Discord server!

We hope you find the support you need here. If you are not able to find support, perhaps try reaching out to users who offering their kind voices! Their posts are denoted with an [O].

-------------------------------------------If you are feeling suicidal ---------------------------------------------------------

1.) If you need immediate medical attention, please call your national emergency number (999, 911, 112, 000.. check your country's emergency line in the crisis line list below)

2.) Consider contacting a suicide helpline, Please find one for your country here.

3.) Please consider posting in /r/suicidewatch , they are far better equipped to talk you through your situation.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.