r/LandlordLove 5d ago

Personal Experience Check or cash? I have neither.

Post image
674 Upvotes

65 comments sorted by

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810

u/ComradeSasquatch 5d ago

That is illegal as hell.

154

u/Van-garde 5d ago

And a misnomer if ever I’ve seen one.

13

u/GroundbreakingCat983 3d ago

Not only illegal, I think collective punishment for an individual transgression violates the Geneva Convention.

469

u/Nivarion 5d ago

not only illegal, but stupid as hell.

Heavy equipment like an excavator is almost always keyed alike. You can order a key for it in the same time it took you to write and post a threatening note, and have the problem solved much quicker than the lawyers that will follow this.

152

u/nw342 5d ago

You can go online and order a new key for almost any heavy machine for a few bucks...

128

u/JustDiscoveredSex 5d ago

This is a gloriously interesting piece of information I was unaware of before. Thanks, Satan!

162

u/TheButcheress123 5d ago

Everyone who upvotes this comment will be charged $200 until all the excavators are returned.

39

u/Apprehensive_Cash108 5d ago

There's all sorts of camps, prisons, or fake cities for practicing 4th amendment violations that would benefit from this sort of information!

31

u/misterjive 4d ago edited 4d ago

Look up Deviant Ollam on YouTube.

You can go online and order keys that will get you into a worrying percentage of secure buildings in the country for a few bucks.

"Your Key is My Key" is I think the name of that lecture, but all of his stuff is fantastic.

(EDIT: My favorite story is the one where a New York cabbie got arrested, and then the cop dropped his keys down a sewer grate. The cabbie told the cop to use his keys-- since most cabs were decommissioned cop cars, and all the cop cars were keyed alike, the cabbie's key unlocked and started the cruiser.)

6

u/DroidLord 4d ago

Thanks for the recommendation! I love watching talks like these. Here's the link: https://youtu.be/a9b9IYqsb_U

3

u/KatieTSO 4d ago

There's also a standard set of elevator keys you can use to take over almost any elevator in the country too. He did a talk about that as well. I'd have to say though, my favorite is Lawyer Passport Locksmith Gun.

u/Old-Olive-4233 10m ago

Q: "What are you watching‽"

A: A 2 hour long video on elevator security, it's freaking amazing.

Q [2 hours later]: What are you watching now

A: A different 2 hour video on elevator security from the same guy. This is way more interesting than you'd ever expect!

23

u/Datan0de 5d ago

The same is true of police handcuffs.

4

u/Potential_Drawing_80 4d ago

You can buy the keys to all Ford Crown Victorias used by cops online as well.

2

u/woolen_goose 4d ago

My ass about to go find some heavy machinery.

30

u/NightGod 5d ago

Hell, you can get a set of keys that will turn on just about anything on a modern construction site for under $50

20

u/treeckosan 5d ago

I bought a 10 pack of forklift keys for $10 a while back and that was the expensive option. There was a listing for a 50 pack of 50 different heavy equipment keys for $40 that I passed on because I just needed spare keys for my forklift at the time.

10

u/20191124anon 5d ago

Also most wafer locks can be opened with a wiggler set that fits in a pocket :)

13

u/Squawnk 5d ago

Hell you can go down to your local dealer or equipment rental place and get one for dirt cheap, sometimes even free. I had to get a few spare bobcat keys and the dealer had so many sitting around, they gave me 6 for free

20

u/Lost_Satyr 5d ago

OP should get free or cheap key and turn it in for reward.

6

u/TwilightReader100 🏠 = Human Right 4d ago

Oh, hell, I ordered a new key for the mailbox of the last house I lived in. The landleech was absentee, came around once a week at best. I rented a UPS box, but also had the key in case I felt like checking it myself. Really, I should have been checking it more often. There was a door between their suite and mine. I had a bookshelf up against the door, since we never opened it anyways. When the movers came for my stuff and moved the bookshelf to take it out to the truck, there was a thick stack of mail that somebody that stays in that other suite has been shoving under the door. They hadn't even been able to be bothered to ask if it was all right to do that. One of my birthday cards and one of my Easter cards from my parents were in that mess of mail.

3

u/PraxicalExperience 4d ago

Ooh, ooh, OP, order a new key, rub some mud in it, and turn it in as 'found' and collect the reward!

2

u/jaygeezythreezy 3d ago

And filing cabinets

5

u/sanityjanity 4d ago

Right. Also, who was the dumbass who left the key in the equipment?

3

u/cuck__everlasting 4d ago

I mean you're right but there's usually a key in heavy equipment like this. Your average Joe is not going to be able to hop in an excavator and take off like it's a golf cart.

259

u/tropicofdespair 5d ago

Lol nah, they can’t charge tenants jack shit over this. This is funny though lol

149

u/thisistherevolt 5d ago

I lived in an apartment complex where they tried to do this, but with the golf cart key. My neighbor had just passed the bar exam, like got his results that day. We were sharing a joint on my patio in celebration when i got this announcement shoved through my door. I went with him down to the office. He literally just said "So I'm a law student who just passed the bar and...."

He wasn't even allowed to finish his sentence as the assistant property manager got up from her desk and yelled at her boss "See? I told you this was illegal! Not even an hour has gone by and this is the third complaint!"

138

u/politicalanalysis 5d ago

Who has access to an excavator key? Sounds like an employee issue. Either an employee left the key in the excavator or an employee left the key somewhere publicly accessible or an employee took the key. Regardless, deal with the shitty employee. Jesus Christ.

74

u/oiraves 5d ago

Kind of everyone does, lots of construction equipment just gets the keys left in it overnight, my brother's used to spend Saturday nights getting drunk, sneaking into work sites and just driving the equipment around

26

u/multipocalypse 5d ago

Okay goals

13

u/EUGsk8rBoi42p 5d ago

Legends 🔥

1

u/ThePennedKitten 3d ago

I wonder if their insurance is aware. lol I can’t imagine that would make them happy? 😂

18

u/Evilution602 5d ago

can order this from websites. heavy equipment is generally keyed alike and not like a vehicle with a unique key. just order based on type and manufacturer.

12

u/oiraves 5d ago

Kind of everyone does, lots of construction equipment just gets the keys left in it overnight, my brother's used to spend Saturday nights getting drunk, sneaking into work sites and just driving the equipment around

2

u/cuck__everlasting 4d ago

You do, you can get one on amazon for a couple dollars.

53

u/ketjak 5d ago

Overseer: My lord, the key to the excavator is missing! I have asked, and no employee knows where it is!

Landlord: It must be... it must be... Igor, what is the so-called "legal" term for the parasites I lease my property to as part of my magnanimous benevolence?

Overseer, index finger in mouth: Um... "tenants," my lord?

Landlord: Tenants! Curse the day I ever let them dig their probosces into my neck!

24

u/OrthodoxAnarchoMom 5d ago

Sh yes, modern amenities- gym, dish washer, excavator.

29

u/MommaLisss 5d ago

Charged $200 until it is returned? How often? Hourly, daily, monthly? Wtf kind of unprofessional shit is this?

15

u/Tufty_Ilam 5d ago

Let's ignore the blatant illegality of this. They're proposing to reward the finder? So... the thief basically gets refunded, and everyone else pays for their crime. That's asinine.

68

u/Grizzlemaw1993 5d ago

How kind of them to put something super illegal like that in print for you. How kind and generous of them to do that so that you can screenshot it, take it to a lawyer, and sue their asses into the ground.

10

u/new2bay 5d ago

Nobody’s suing anyone “into the ground” over $200. Even if this place has 1000 units, a class action doesn’t make sense, and it’s just barely worth going to small claims as a tenant. The only way a lawsuit has wings is if you can spin it as landlord harassment. That’s a possibility, but I wouldn’t bet my paycheck on it.

10

u/AKA_June_Monroe 5d ago

Not so good at managing property.

10

u/BeeBunnBunny 5d ago

it’s giving disgruntled 5th grade teacher punishment 😭

5

u/Unique-Abberation 5d ago

Time to lawyer up

5

u/skitty166 5d ago

Reading these posts make me realize I’ve had the best landlords. Lol

6

u/No-Brief-297 5d ago

😂😂😂 $200 a day? Week? Month? Get it rekeyed and get on with your life.

7

u/20191124anon 5d ago

Dear PeePee Management Inc

I have seem to have misplaced my diamond necklace. I'll be charging your company for $750,000, but there is an unspecified reward for a person who turns up with the necklace.

(no send off or signature intentionally)

3

u/WN_Todd 5d ago

Hint: it was the guy with the newly dug pond.

3

u/masterfulnoname 4d ago

It was a team of highly trained and motivated ducks.

2

u/Masochist_pillowtalk 4d ago

Send an email back saying you get a month of free rent for every day they cant move thst unsightly excavator off the property.

Holds the same amount of water theirs does. Could start an intetesting discussion.

3

u/TheGrandMasterFox 5d ago

How is it anyone's fault other than the last fucktard that drove it?

1

u/Chrissy325 5d ago

Yea…. They can’t do this

1

u/Meltedwhisky 5d ago

I have at least 10-12 different excavator keys in the shop. They're a dime a dozen. This is ridiculously

1

u/Sarsaucetic 4d ago

Steal the excavator

1

u/ScruffyBeardmen 4d ago

No way, I saw this in my local fb groups just yesterday

1

u/JellyFranken 4d ago

lol this isn’t grade school. You just know bruh lost the fucking key.

1

u/tidalwave077 3d ago

Please sue

1

u/-hesh- 3d ago

right into the special filing cabinet for landlord correspondence.

1

u/BandicootGood1177 3d ago

How do they charge EVERYBODY bc someone that works for them left the key where someone could take it?? Idk if this is even legal!! What if someone came in the neighborhood one night, saw the keys and took them? You’re now charging tenants that have NOTHING to do with it! This is crazy

1

u/External-College6763 2d ago

Order one online and then collect reward🤝