Just got diagnosed. Kind of confused

[u/of2970]

So, I got diagnosed a few hours ago. I’ve just been sitting, carrying on as normal. Not sure how to feel and as the hours pass by, I’m beginning to worry it was all a fluke and that the doctor is going to undiagnose me.

I’ve suspected I have ADHD for at least a decade now but was always too scared to do anything about it. I’m south Asian and the whole attitude around mental health is bloody patronising. I did consider going to a psychiatrist once I started working but always chickened out because it’s hard enough for women to get diagnosed in western countries; imagine getting diagnosed in the subcontinent?! LOL!

Anyway, gathered up all my courage and did it: the screenings, the questionnaires blah blah blah and got the diagnosis. But I’m just not convinced. In the days leading up to the appointment, I kept having angry episodes, just being filled with rage because of all the bullshit the adults put me through because I didn’t obey them to a T. And now, it’s all gone. When the doctor confirmed it, I went blank. They said it’s okay to cry and I just smiled. Feel like that was the wrong thing to do too. I should’ve had some sort of an emotional reaction right?

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[u/zooropa42]

Your reaction is just that, your own reaction! One of the things about ADHD is you can't really predict how you will react in certain situations, especially life-altering ones. We are off in the ones who laugh at inappropriate times, cry at inappropriate times, and don't react when others expect us to. It doesn't negate anything we feel, I think our feelings just hit differently.

I felt the same way you did when I was diagnosed late in life...I thought how in the world could this be me? Then I started researching and looking online and looking up typical symptoms women with ADHD have. It literally explained every aspect in my life. It justified my feelings and made me feel good, but also made me hurt for the little girl and the teenager who was constantly called a space cadet and weird... It honestly took me awhile to get over and I still get upset watching certain ADHD people in videos experience the things I did. It just brings back all the past anger and sadness that I experienced as a kid, and as a young adult.

Do some research and look some stuff up about adult women with ADHD suddenly being diagnosed as adults. I think you will understand you're in good company!

Welcome to the rest of your life, my friend!