okay so me and a straight coworker were having drinks at his place and we were pretty tipsy. The convo did end up getting into sexual stuff & He asked his gf if he can show me videos and she said yes. I didn’t know what the videos were until it was up on the screen. It was their videos playing with themselves for each other over video call. Ngl it was kinda hot. I complimented both of them cause you can see her playing with herself but also on a video call the little box is you.. so I could see him jerking off. He told her I complimented them and she said “all that’s left is for him (me) to watch them have sex”. And he was down for it. They both know I’m gay as well. But there is like 75% of me that would be down but also 25% that’s like omg? Also as I was leaving he said that I would see his dick when his girl came down and we did the “watching” thing. And I said show me now & he did…. Do you guys think this is gonna be just me watching or do you think they might ask me to join? Also is it a bad idea to do this with my coworker ? Idk I’m having lots of thoughts about it lol also the fact he was so quick to show me his dick and turn around to show me his ass .. I was a little shocked by it lol

Sooooo, Im single again and I obv download Grindr after a really long time and I just wanted to check if that’s normal or if it’s just me? Veeeeeery limited visible circle, seeing like 15ppl max around me and the others 100km+ away? If I put filters on even less. WHATEVER you do in the app, you get attack by strange advertisement? Is that normal? What happened y’all????

This is a follow-up to my original post.

https://www.reddit.com/r/askgaybros/s/q77NDNnOkI

I’m 26. My boyfriend is 45. My mom banned him from visiting the house, Reddit lit up, and suddenly everyone’s an expert on power dynamics.

Let me ask: If I were a 26yo woman dating a 45yo man, Leo DiCaprio style, people might side-eye it, but move on. If I were a guy dating a 45yo woman, like Macron and his old high school teacher, I’d be called lucky. But two men? Now it’s predatory. Grooming. Daddy issues. Everyone starts diagnosing me like I posted from a psych ward.

Why is it so hard to believe a young gay man can choose an older partner without being damaged, exploited, or dumb?

If we only trust adults when they make the choices you would, do you actually believe in agency? Or just obedience?

So here’s my question:

Why are we okay with kinks, poly, and open dynamics, but not an older boyfriend?

EDIT:

Are we really worried about power dynamics in age gaps, or just masking our discomfort? And if some are fine and some predatory, who decides where the line is?

i can’t hookup. i don’t go to clubs. i’m not artsy, i have no gay friends ect

it’s like all the good parts of being gay just skipped me. i never had a problem with being gay but i’m not even like the other gays it seems, just wish i could be like everyone else sometimes

anyone else feel the same?

i’m turning 24 soon and it’s just really weighing on me mentally

yesterday i was hanging out with my friend in the hot tub and he got his dick out just to be funny and ive never thought i was gay but after seeing it im seriously questioning it

I am usually surrounded by fit people, even though I am not really fit myself.

Friend 1: Competed in body building, he came 3rd but the years and years of prep and steroids, with him, the mood swings, alot of sweating and weakness of breath.... he said he hated the process but the outcome was worth it to him.

Friend 2: He came over and slept over, he would wake up choking to his own closed throat multiple times, the deep, loud snoring, bad back acne, he would just go on mini mood rants, he would complain about internal cramps etc.......

Friend 3: He had alot of dizziness he said, he was tired all the time, he was constantly hungry and his skin went grainy. he also aged in the face quite a bit, he also said he can't sleep.

I admit, I wanted to take steroids for a 12 week cycle and see how I go, but the side effects just scared the crap out of me. I understand everyone is different and you diet needs to be fucking spot on.... but I wouldn't know if I am a good candidate for steroids, I feel I am 80% good cause I can stick to a diet and a plan but every time I think of it, I am happy going the natural route.

While having that steroid, gym fit body....... and I am sure alot of gays love it and want it. But are you on it? was it worth it? worth your health? hyper responder? didn't respond at all? Are you happy you did or regret it?

As a gay man pursuing a degree in medicine while simultaneously building a career in plant science and conservation, I’ve found myself reflecting on the professional paths that many queer individuals, particularly gay men, tend to follow. Anecdotally, around 80% of my close friends are also gay men, each having their own unique careers across STEM fields

Do gay men tend to gravitate toward white-collar professions more often?

Of course, I’m fully aware that career choices are shaped by a multitude of factors like personal interests, socio-economic background, education, access, and identity among them. But I can’t help but notice a trend among gay people , there’s a strong presence in academia, healthcare, research, tech, and creative work

Is this simply a reflection of the circles I move in, or is there something more systemic at play? Could it be that queer individuals often pursue white-collar or intellectual careers as a means of self-expression, safety, or social mobility? Or perhaps these fields offer environments where authenticity and individuality are more easily embraced?

So it's always a question I've had. If you like saunas, gay orgies, parties, etc. how do you enjoy it and prevent people to talk about that about you?

Not everything has to be bad, there must be Jews, Christians or some other type of religion here.

I often see many guys staring at me but never say Hi.

This guy topped me better than I had been in years! But then wipes his dick off on my blanket, takes a shower and leaves the towel on the floor, put his shoes on while walking on my chinchilla rug, and proceeds to talk about how he fucks a different guy every other night but wishes he could find 3 or 4 regulars.

Makes me not want to call him back.

No one is perfect, we all have flaws but what is one thing about you that would boost your confidence so much?

Personally, I lack a chest, everything else seems to grow but if I can have a decent chest my confidence will sky rocket, I am content how my other body parts are growing and toning up but my damn chest doesn't grow for some reason, so many exercises done, train them twice a week but nope, they won't grow. :(

you?

Apologies if this is a basic question, but I'm just getting back into dating after getting over a long relationship.

I (28M) briefly met a guy (29M) at an event and we got each other's phone numbers, and then after some brief texting we set up a first date, which was yesterday. I thought the date went well because after talking for an hour or so we ended up going for a short walk and hung out at a second location — about 2.5 hours total. We were both asking a lot of questions about each other and seemed to have a lot in common. At the end we hugged and he said "see you again soon".

I texted him afterwards saying I had a good time and that I'd love to see him again, but he didn't respond. It's been about exactly a day at this point. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to take the hint and just move on or if it's worth sending a follow-up. Is there any reason to give him the benefit of the doubt?

This is 100% true. I was talking with this guy on Grindr. We made arrangements to meet in a parking lot about 30 miles away from my house. Once I got there, I hopped into his truck, said hi. He must of been edging or something because he unzipped, hard already no precum tho, but I literally went down and up twice and he shoots his load. I wasn't in the truck for 2 minutes. What a waste of gas and time.

Maybe I’m too chronically online, but i’ve seen an enormous radicalization against us, gay men, not your typical normie con arguments against “trans kids” but literal hatred against homosexuals, so I’ve been radicalizing a bit too against them, maybe I’m becoming a lil bit heterophobic at times who knows.

Because of that, I love to argue with them but I’ve noticed the majority of the comebacks used against them is just calling them “gay” or they are secretly gay because they hate gay people (?) and listen that may happen from time to time but objectively the majority of them are straight and it seems that a lot of them are naturally repulsed by our existence since they view us as traitors of the brotherhood or deserters of masculinity, so I suggest attacking them for what they are: straight men. I call them chimpanzeeteros, shitheros, they’ll resort to call you infertile while their birth rates are in the worst numbers ever, they divorce even more than gay men, they lack of artistic skills, all that stuff gets them more that just calling them “gay”, cause it also feels like we believe being gay is insulting and we want to “drag” them with us, I don’t want this people around me.