r/mildlyinfuriating • u/derek4reals1 • 1d ago

Overdone The parking job wasn't the part

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u/EnormousMycoprotein 1d ago

The tram should just be allowed to push the cars out the way.

17

u/bjeebus 1d ago

Unfortunately that will probably damage the train.

15

u/ShamScience 1d ago

What if we give the tram robot arms? With spikey claws! Just toss the cars aside!

10

u/bjeebus 1d ago

This sounds like the discussions my wife and I have about why I shouldn't have superpowers. I wouldn't exactly be a supervillain--I'd just be extremely petty.

4

u/C4rdninj4 1d ago

This is exactly why a Lantern ring will never choose me.

1

u/bjeebus 1d ago

There's no spectra for spiteful...

1

u/Hot-Win2571 Mildly Flair 1d ago

Name: The Petty Tyrant
Real Name: Percival "Percy" Nix
Origin Story:
Percival Nix was once a respected — if insufferably nitpicky — librarian in a grand city’s archives. Obsessed with order, recognition, and having the "last word," he became consumed by every small slight: unreturned greetings, misplaced books, misattributed quotes. One fateful day, an ancient cursed tome (naturally misfiled by a careless intern) imbued him with the mystical force of Ultimate Pettiness.

Powers:

  • Reality Warping through Grudges: If someone wrongs him, even trivially, he can warp reality just enough to make their life miserable — missing keys, endless bad hair days, emails getting lost, shoelaces snapping at the worst moment.
  • Passive Aura of Inconvenience: Anyone who spends too much time around him finds small irritations stacking up: coffee spills, forgotten passwords, paper cuts.
  • Perfect Memory for Slights: He remembers everything — every forgotten "thank you," every backhanded compliment — and weaponizes them in villainous monologues.
  • Summon the "Council of Pettiness": Ghostly figures who echo and amplify his complaints, creating chaos by sowing minor but relentless dissent among heroes.

Appearance:
Dressed in a patchwork of outdated "Employee of the Month" plaques and broken participation trophies, The Petty Tyrant wears a long, tattered cape made from office passive-aggression — complete with embroidered insults like “per my last email” and “not my job.”

Catchphrase:
"I could forgive you... but where’s the fun in that?"

Typical Plot:
The Petty Tyrant never tries to take over the world in a grand way. Instead, he meticulously sabotages heroes' personal lives until they’re too frustrated and distracted to save the day. One hero’s toaster explodes, another’s cape gets caught in elevators, another’s dog suddenly prefers the neighbor. His masterplan? To make the world so petty and bitter that chaos reigns one passive-aggressive comment at a time.