I felt so guilty dropping my last therapist but he would just sit in silence not saying anything after I’d finished talking, so I’d panic and fill the silence with irrelevant rambling, which he would then respond to and ask me if he was making sense like he was insecure about his role as a therapist.
I’d spend 5 minutes every session trying to make him feel better about himself. I felt awful because he was technically a trainee and I thought oh nooo someone needs to tell him he’s not doing great so he can improve, but also I was there for being a horrifically compulsive people pleaser so it wasn’t going to be me! I lied and said I feeling better after 3 sessions and didn’t need help anymore which probably didn’t help 🤦🏻♀️
I know! At one point I made a passive comment about not liking the colour purple for some reason in my waffling, without realising he was wearing a purple jumper and he was like like “oh I guess I won’t wear purple next time then sorry” with a sad face and suddenly I spent the rest of my session being like “oh wait no I didn’t mean it like that, plus it’s a specific shade of purple I don’t like and I’d say your jumper is closer to magenta, which I do like, also it doesn’t matter what I like if you like it but it looks totally fine on you …blah blah blah”
I was so dizzy by the end of that session talking myself in circles about something I just said to fill silence and then he still joked he would never wear it again on my way out.
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u/the-awesomer 2d ago
There are a surprising amount of terrible therapists out there.