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u/newthhang 16h ago
"her quick wits"... you would think she said something unbelievable -- but all she did is act confused so he gets embarrassed. It's not new for people to pretended not to get misogynistic, racist or homophobic jokes so the other party gets embarrassed when they have to explain.
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u/CaeruleumBleu 11h ago
Also it ain't difficult to turn an initial confused reaction into a "oh I really don't understand you, can you explain" reaction.
If it is your goal to respond this way to a "joke", your first move literally SHOULD be "huh?". No quick wit to it.
And for all that I know what the question means, if someone asked me that in public my first reaction would be "huh?" because why the fuck are you asking?
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u/CanadaHaz 12h ago
Hell, i did that to my uncle once when I was 13 Got to watch him struggle to explain why a joke about murdering gay men was funny. He couldn't. I agree that feeling should be sold as a drug.
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u/hexray 11h ago
Jesus lol. Good on you, what a weird joke.
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u/CanadaHaz 11h ago
Best part, I didn't even say anything. I just stared at him in an uncomfortable silence.
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u/Rhodehouse93 10h ago
Yeah, making them explain it has been a known strategy since I was in high school. Not unrealistic by any measure.
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u/Plastic-Reply1399 11h ago
Perverted not misogynistic
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u/x_pinklvr_xcxo 10h ago
sexually harassing women is misogynistic
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u/Plastic-Reply1399 10h ago
Nah people make the same comment to ginger men it’s just perverted
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u/Traditional-Yak8886 3h ago
nah, it is fucking weird. i'm sure guys will laugh it off and tell you it's fine, but the implication that you can talk about someone's body and they Have to accept it, nay, enjoy it, because they're a guy is stupid. no one likes it. i wonder why it's ONLY ginger men that have this happen anyway? because they're a group of people that folks find it socially acceptable to bully. talk about your own pubes.
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u/Used1999ToyotaYaris 9h ago
Asking someone if their hair color matches their pubes does not equal disliking or distrusting their entire gender
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u/alchemillahunter 12h ago
I've done this before when I was outed without my permission as bisexual to my entire workplace, something I kept private for a reason. Suddenly all of my coworkers decided it was somehow appropriate to ask me about my "orgies" and how my "sex life must be amazing with threesomes." I'd act stupid every time they asked me, and they eventually stopped once they had to explain their line of reasoning on why I, a bisexual dude, was automatically assumed to be fucking anything and everything, because it made them extremely embarrassed.
So yes, this does happen, and it's an effective way on getting bigots and inappropriate comments to stop. Mind you I barely spoke to these people, they were NOT friendly enough to me to ask such invasive questions. My sex life is not anyone's business but my own, especially not my fucking coworkers.
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u/Boeing_Fan_777 11h ago
I love to play dumb but I love to make them regret asking sometimes, too. My personal go-to for “whats in your pants” is chastity belt or something along those lines. It has never not worked in shutting some nosy fucker up lmao
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u/Sam858 17h ago
Yes because a red head who has probably been asked that question, at least once a week, since she was old enough to have a "carpet" is not going to have a come back for it.
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u/nazukeru 11h ago
The first time I was asked that stupid fucking question, I was 10.
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u/Msbossyboots 6h ago
Same. And at that point, I honestly did not understand the question.
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u/nazukeru 1h ago
Neither did I.. but I remember my sister being really mad about it. When I got older I was like Jesus fucking Christ.
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u/RiverScout2 32m ago
Men even asked me me about my carpet & drapes when I was in elementary school. I didn’t understand and hope at least a few were ashamed by my confused response.
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u/jackfaire 14h ago
That's not quick wits that's the common well thought out strategy. Someone's being an asshole you make them explain their assholery.
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u/Unhappy_Wishbone_551 14h ago
Yeah. It seems to me one the most common pieces of advice given is to ask people to explain their shitty comments in order to embarrass them. I've done it a couple of times. It's very satisfying.
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u/FixergirlAK 10h ago
That's been advised as a way to disarm unwanted sexual comments for decades now. How is it in any way unbelievable that someone actually used it? I've done it, the stuttering and embarrassment is hilarious.
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u/Lerega 11h ago
I didn't even understand what he said (English is my second language)
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u/Open-Tomato9643 10h ago
He was essentially asking her if her pubic hair was the same colour as the hair on her head.
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u/moistwaffleboi 9h ago
I don't understand how this is considered to be unbelievable.
I've definitely pretended not to understand a guy's sexual comments to make him have to explain it before, and I'm sure a lot of other women have as well.
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u/kleptotoid 9h ago
The thing is, this is commonly advised to women to do when they get harassed. This is just a woman who took the advice given to her and it worked exactly as intended
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u/DieHardAmerican95 9h ago
Making someone explain their shitty sexual joke is frequently recommended as a solution to that particular problem. I’m not sure why it would be surprising to anyone.
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u/SuperHyperFunTime 7h ago
I saw something like this happen right in front of me.
I was at a sales conference. My company pulled all of our suppliers in to show off their wares and give us training. It was 3 days long and exhausting. One of the teams was "scientific furniture" which is basically cupboards on wheels that you can configure to set up labs any way you want.
There were two people in a team, can't remember their names as it was well over 20 years ago but a woman and a man, both 40s I would guess. At one point during the presentation and training, the guy who had worked with this woman for probably 18 months decided to make some joke about her hair colour and "fellas don't worry, I can guarantee you, the curtains match the drapes". The air was sucked out of the room and there were some nervous chuckles but holy shit it was bad.
He was fired that day for gross misconduct and sent packing. The woman (a redhead) was fucking mortified and humiliated. I'm shocked the company acted so quickly to deal with it.
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u/Dullea619 9h ago edited 8h ago
I love that guys really don't think women have responses to their shitty "jokes."
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u/JustUsetheDamnATM 7h ago
Because acting like you don't get it and making them explain isn't a well-known response to sexist, racist, homophobic, basically any kind of shitty joke? I've known this one and used it since I was 12.
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u/BuryatMadman 9h ago
I know a guy who did this but just started cracking up explaining it so in the end the women got embarrassed he was literally laughing so loud at his own joke that the entire lunch room heard it and she was so flustered I think he was a bit autistic
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u/your_local_frog_boy 4h ago
okay but what does "does the carpet match the drapes" mean cuz I actually don't know
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u/Harrison_w1fe 7h ago
The unrealistic part is that the guy would be self aware enough to be embarrassed.
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u/NeilJosephRyan 6h ago
Why would she want that feeling bottled as a drug though? It sounds incredibly uncomfortable.
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u/Zombys11 2h ago
I’m starting to think the people who post on there don’t ever talk to people in meat space
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u/Tiger3Tiger 1h ago
It's not even quick wits. I've always heard to do that, it makes them uncomfortable usually. I've done it to people, I'm a man and when I see a man do that to a woman in any context I usually act confused and ask them to explain it to me and they HATE that.
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u/onacloverifalive 9h ago
It’s a quote from a well known movie and book. And it’s meant to be an a-hole comment in the original context.
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u/Time-Conversation741 8h ago
Ever dubble down or bail but dont do what tast guy did.
That just sad
I would have mansplaned that shit out of that crappy joke
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u/Thefear1984 14h ago
The man who asks if the carpet matches the drapes as a pickup line is never embarrassed to explain. In fact, he’d be more “let’s find out together” or some shit. I kinda feel this is one of those influencers spreading bullshit. While it’s possible this occurred it doesn’t track. For that reason, I’m out.
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u/throwaway_ArBe 11h ago
And then you say "what do you mean let's find out together" and continue to play dumb until they either make a fool of themself or get pissed off and leave. If there is an audience they are more likely to get embarrassed over explaining. I'm guessing you've never actually done this?
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u/shamanbaptist 11h ago
I’ve done this (with racist stuff, not being hit on), but I kinda hate it because it’s passive aggressive.
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u/VelveteenJackalope 13h ago
Yeah no. This is a super common tactic to shut up assholes and it works because these people are so used to being completely normalized that having someone show them that what they're doing is in fact really fucking weird and not normal instead of just going along with it fucks with them.
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u/KaralDaskin 12h ago
Yeah. I used this technique in the 90s. Someone said such and such thing was so gay, and I asked him what was gay about it. It at least changed his speech patterns around me.
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u/snailbot-jq 13h ago edited 12h ago
I mean I’ve met guys of both sorts— the kind of guy you speak of who can double down all the way (usually indicative of a certain kind of personality), but conversely, there is also the kind who is emboldened by alcohol to deliver the initial lousy pickup line after gathering all their courage to do so, but then chickens out if called out.
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u/Pure-Acanthisitta783 5h ago
The guy honestly probably just walked away confused how someone could be that sheltered, but I haven't heard that line from someone in like 20 years.
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u/Themodsarecuntz 9h ago
Yes because a person who would ask a stranger that would be embarrassed when the stranger didn't understand. Yes. Quite.
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u/CeroMiedic 15h ago
The woman in the pic is brunette, the post is a lie.
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u/TheLittleMuse 15h ago
Eh, the photo isn't entirely clear, and it could be an old photo. She could have easily dyed her hair. Lying about being a redhead would be a very weird thing to lie about.
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u/CeroMiedic 14h ago
Just asked, recently, no woman would dye her hair red and not update the profile photo.
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u/TheLittleMuse 14h ago
"No woman" you know woman aren't a monolith? Some women are just lazy about that sort of thing.
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u/Imaginary-Mountain60 14h ago
This is joking or sarcasm, right? (I'm a woman who has dyed my hair several times but not once updated my profile photo just for that.)
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u/KaralDaskin 12h ago
Based on other comments, I’m going with troll.
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u/JustUsetheDamnATM 7h ago
Look at the profile. Absolutely screams "I haven't seen a 😺 in real life since my umbilical cord was being cut, and even the woman attached to that one wants nothing to do with me."
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u/CanadaHaz 12h ago
Who did you ask? I know women who've gone all different colours without updating profile pics.
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u/decapods 11h ago
You didn’t get his poll? He sent it to every woman ever with a variety of demographic questions so that he could leave this very sound scientific in-no-way-a-bullshit-anecdotal-take fact referring to All Women.
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u/quendergender 14h ago
It’s auburn
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u/CeroMiedic 13h ago
Still doesn't change the fact the story is a lie, no man in this day and she asks a stranger that question. And that is how it is set out, it is just another men bad story.
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u/Big-Sheepherder-4199 13h ago
It's not believable that a man would make a gross comment to a woman?🤨 are you fr rn? what planet are you living on?😭
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u/CeroMiedic 13h ago
You're probably American aren't you, in America of course that happens, in any civilised part of the world men don't generally care if a woman dyes her hair and will not ask her that directly or indirectly by asking the question the OOP claimed she got from a stranger.
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u/decapods 11h ago
I don’t understand your argument. The only gross men are in America. Soooo how do you know the lady in the thread isn’t American?
I can tell you that I have heard outrageous things out of men’s mouths many times.
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
I'm not saying men do not say outrageous things, context is key, saying something like that to a woman you know as a badly thought out joke is one thing, saying it to a stranger could get you punched in the face at best.
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u/laikocta 9h ago
Where in the world does it not happen that men will make sexual remarks to women they don't know?
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
How is asking someone if their hair is dyed, even in this old fashioned crappy joke kind of way a sexual remark.
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u/JustUsetheDamnATM 7h ago
Last time I was sexually harassed by a stranger on the street it was by a British tourist, in Athens. So I'm going to go ahead and call bullshit on your claim that creeps don't exist outside the US.
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u/throwaway_ArBe 11h ago
It wasn't "this day", it's an old screenshot and was more normal behaviour back then. But also it still happens plenty.
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
If it was posted on twitter it isn't that old, the post isn't from the 80s.
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u/throwaway_ArBe 8h ago
Do you think harassment only happened in the 80s
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u/CeroMiedic 8h ago
Do you think a man who would say that to a stranger would stop and explain it, even more get embarrassed, the details kill the story, he either would not have stopped or not been embarrassed, a man that bold would not be embarrassed by that.
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u/throwaway_ArBe 7h ago
Yes strangers say that to strangers. Yes strangers stop and get into it. Yes strangers get embarrassed regardless of if they are a misogynist or not. Touch grass.
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u/cosmolark 10h ago
You can literally Google "Alice Moran" and see that she frequently has red hair.
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
So, it must be true because she has had red hair, the story as told never happened, no man in their right mind says that to a stranger they do not know, it's either a lie or someone she was on a date with or something said it as a badly thought out joke, the fact he explained it says that to me.
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u/Pumpkiinpuppy 9h ago
My best friend is a red head, as true copper as it gets, and she’s been asked this time and time again by absolute strangers. It isn’t as uncommon as you think. Just because YOU can’t fathom asking this to a complete stranger doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. Some people are fucking freaks.
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
Great point well made, I thought the world was getting better and this kind of shit was done with.
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u/cosmolark 9h ago
You're clearly a dude if you think this doesn't happen with startling regularity.
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u/CeroMiedic 9h ago
I thought it was a fucking awful joke that died out about 30 years ago, not something that was still being said to strangers as an actual line.
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u/VelveteenJackalope 13h ago
"Her quick wits" you mean the most common piece of advice the internet has been giving for like ten years on how to shut down assholes? But also like. Yeah. Even if this was something she came up with herself. Humans are witty. We literally came up with a whole word to describe the phenomenon because it was a trait we noticed in one another. Are these people silicon-based lifeforms or some shit?