Now that I’ve talked to my sponsor and my grandma and mom, I feel like I can take a brick off my chest. This is hard for me to say… but I’m 42 days sober today.

It’s hard for me to say because once upon a time I built up 1/2 a decade and I gave it all up so that I felt like I fit in and so that a guy would stay with me. Drunk gay guys will do anything to get a guy to stay with them. Pretty lame, as far as I’m concerned. Then it just kept going so I could feel “a part of”. So there’s been a lot of self judgment.

This time was different, I’ll tell you that. I didn’t drink every night this time, but I drank just like I used to on the nights that I did. It wasn’t as high frequency but it was just as painful, if not more, and doubly hard to accept. Catastrophic nights were the same as ever.

I’ve feel like I’ve stoned myself off from people and the world for too long and it’s because I couldn’t believe I had failed myself to much. Furthermore, I felt like I was too ashamed to talk about it or ask for help.

Being that my feelings are bigger than my body, for years I’ve felt like I’ve had some kind of brick of my chest that wouldn’t let come up from underwater.

Today, admitting, I feel another unexpected feeling. Relief. I feel like myself today and who he is at his core more than I have in about two years. Emotional, rigorous honesty driving me today rather than the dry drunk I’ve been stuck in and the deep, dank depression that cast its spell on me.

I’ve gotten 5 years before. I had a year once before that. 6 months before that. I think this time I’ll focus on having a better toolkit being honest about my feelings, and I think I’ll just take it one day at a time this time. It’s so nice to not feel like an angry micro version of myself drying to beat threw a brick wall today. I feel so relieved. Here’s to 42 days back on track. #wedorecover

I have struggled with addiction and substance abuse off and on for a while and I think the missing piece to my lasting recovery is community support. I signed myself up for an intensive outpatient program and I want to find a support group to attend alongside the program.

I went to an NA meeting last week, and I hope I don't offend anyone with this post, but I don't vibe with their approach at all. For one, I don't like the emphasis on powerlessness and submitting to a higher power. I believe in God, but I also believe in my autonomy. I also don't like that every time someone shares in a meeting, they begin by saying, "My name is ____, I am an addict." I think words are powerful and I don't want to label myself or make addiction my identity.

I only recently learned that there are other support groups for recovery with a different approach from NA/AA, such as SMART and DHARMA. I was wondering if anyone has experience with any of these groups. I would love to learn more about my options as I try to find a community that I fit into.

Today marks 6 months sober.

I never thought I could do it. Substance abuse is like being possessed, it tells you all sorts of things that are very untrue. It tells you that you can’t live without it. It tells you that you are nothing without it. It tells you that if you let it go you’d be worthless. All of these things are lies.

You CAN live without it. You are EVERYTHING without it. If you’re struggling with substance abuse at all, don’t be afraid to reach out. This doesn’t have to be your life forever. You have much more control than you think, and you have much more power than your addiction had led you to believe.

Thank you to those that have supported me.

All glory to god. 🖤

This morning, as I was talking to someone, it struck me that there are countless ways to break through and support recovery for someone you deeply love—whether a spouse, child, parent, or anyone close to your heart.

I shared with her that it’s about sowing a seed. That seed may grow to fruition in a week or take years, but the act of planting it is what matters.

Most people think of only two or three ways to help someone they love: therapy, rehab, or tough love. However, there are many other approaches that can foster breakthroughs in recovery.

One effective way is sharing a book—perhaps a biography of someone who struggled with addiction and overcame it, The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, or similar resources. Such literature can speak volumes, breaking down the defenses that often arise in direct conversations.

I personally remember reading literature from Alcoholics Anonymous while I was still drinking. My cousin Juko brought them home, and they immediately piqued my interest. Those books planted a seed in me that eventually grew into a full harvest of transformation.

Another approach is sharing a movie or recommending one. This could be done subtly, avoiding any unnecessary tension. Similarly, sharing a YouTube video related to healing—whether about self-esteem, psychology, or personal growth—can also be impactful. It doesn’t always have to focus specifically on addiction.

A simple yet powerful gesture is giving them a daily hug and telling them they are loved and appreciated. This works on two levels: it lowers defenses within you and within them. When defenses are lowered, empathy and love have the space to flow into the relationship.

Building trust is another vital step. Engage in friendly, nonjudgmental conversations without directly or indirectly referencing their struggles with addiction. This creates a foundation of trust, which is essential in helping someone overcome their challenges.

Additionally, be mindful of how you share their struggles with others. There’s a significant difference between confiding in a trusted few and making them the “talk of the town.” When a struggling individual hears they’ve become the subject of gossip, it can reinforce their denial.

Finally, consider involving wise third parties. By “wise,” I don’t necessarily mean trained professionals but rather individuals with relevant experience. Addiction is often a symptom of deeper issues—perhaps past trauma, such as sexual abuse. Someone who has gone through a similar experience may offer invaluable support. This doesn’t have to be someone who has overcome addiction; discernment and patience are key when choosing the right person to involve.

These are just some of the ways to inspire breakthroughs in recovery for someone you love.

I'm in week 5, going into week 6, sober. And somehow the last few days I'm full of depression, irritability, and sadness. I know it's likely paws. I miss week 1 and 2 when I felt up, more energy, and so positive. It just feels harder now. And my mind keeps suggesting a drink will solve it all, which I know will make it all a million times worse. I just don't get why these emotions and struggles keep showing up when doing the right things. Mostly sharing and venting because I know you all understand.

Question: My addiction to drugs has made me feel shame and guilt, to the extent that I avoid being around people too much. How can I overcome this?

Answer: Addiction thrives on secrecy, deception, rejection, and selfishness, which in turn robes us with shame and guilt.

Breaking free from these feelings in recovery starts with honesty. This means becoming accountable, opening up about even the most shameful actions to a trusted confidant, and summoning the courage to confront every secret. It also requires a willingness to make amends for past wrongs.

Recovery involves more than just ceasing habits like lying and stealing—it calls for breaking deeper patterns of manipulation and control. Making amends is a crucial step in the process of overcoming shame and guilt.

Perhaps the most transformative step is learning to forgive oneself. Many of us carry self-condemnation for actions that others have already…

https://kin2therapper.com/shame-and-guilt/

I dont drink anymore or smoke anything. Life can just get so dull and depressing . I have my own hobbies including working out . I sometimes drink the non alchol float drinks ,but only when im not alone. F29. My addiction was with pot . I dont drink anymore because it make my depression worse. Ive stloppedd nicotine because vape make me out of breathe. I feel like lifd is so still stressful and nothing takes edge off and social activies are boring being only fully sober one .

I've been in IT for 10 years and recently switched to a sales role. Today, I worked at my first conference from 7 a.m. to 11 p.m. I wanted to turn in at 7:30 p.m., but a bunch of people and my boss went to a cigar bar, and I felt like I'd miss out on good networking opportunities.

Anyway, I've been sober for 7 years and don't want to drink, but I can see, if I'm not careful, one could look good after a day like today. Also, even though I was sober, it felt like I wasn't because it reminded me of my party lifestyle. I felt gross coming back to my hotel room.

Is anyone out there in sales who has long-term sobriety? Tips?

Highly intelligent, talented, gifted, or physically attractive individuals often face unique vulnerabilities that make them prone to addiction. Two major factors—pride and bitterness—play a significant role in this susceptibility.

1. Pride: Pride often manifests as an attitude of entitlement: “I’m extraordinary, so I can get away with anything.” However, addiction bluntly disproves that notion.
   

This mindset of “getting away with it” fosters harmful behaviors such as lying, secrecy, and deception. Pride can also trick talented individuals into thinking they’ll always be able to recover or “catch up” later, much like the hare who underestimated the tortoise in the fable.

For those struggling with addiction, addressing pride is essential. Humility can pave the way to breaking free from the chains of addiction.

1. Bitterness:…
   

https://kin2therapper.com/vulnerable-to-addiction/

8 Years ago:

He reached down from on high and took hold of me Pulled me from the deep waters He rescued me from my powerful enemy From all my foes, who were too strong for me

Today is the 8th anniversary of waking up and the compulsion to drink was completely gone. Not one day even thinking about needing a drink. I had been drinking for 45 years.

got this message. i’d like to think this ties into my sobriety… 28 days today, clean and free.

Been smoking weed / alcohol/ shrooms and shi since 8 grade now 19 looking to give it up . Drop tips

Hi everyone. I'm close to 5 and a half months totally sober and almost 8 months away from alcohol, but I still have so many up and down moods. I try to keep it as even as I can, but it doesn't feel easy all the time. I still have thoughts of just wanting to be disconnected for a bit sometimes. Being completely present is more often than not a beautiful thing that I love, but anxiety has always been a huge problem for me and of course my "solution" before was right to the bottle. I really try to keep a contact with my higher power and other alcoholics. It helps a lot. I also still have those times where if I'm being honest I'll be crying myself to sleep basically. I've been mentally clear the past couple days, but today has been a little tougher. I've also been having really bad digestive issues making it very difficult to eat at times and that frustrates me and lowers my mood. Just wanted to know who else has experienced this and if any shifts in perspective or actions that helped. Hope you're all having a great day. Thank you.

As the the title says, I’m 30 days sober today. Don’t really have anyone to celebrate this with so thought I’d share here. Love you all and hope you have a good week.

Tik Tok: @ayerealquickdonjae

When faced with the temptation to drink, use, or act out, there are two ways to “run away” from it:

1. Running Away from Temptation: This involves physically removing yourself from situations where the temptation is present. It could mean staying out of environments that encourage such behaviors, avoiding people who engage in them, or simply stepping away when faced with triggering scenarios. In this form of running away, you create physical distance as a means of protection.

2. Running Away to Recovery: This is about choosing to run towards embracing the tools and practices that recovery offers. Instead of simply fleeing physically, this form of running away focuses on emotional and spiritual growth—seeking solace, strength, and healing through recovery strategies.

While the first approach can provide immediate relief, the second proves to be more effective in the long run. Running away to…

https://kin2therapper.com/two-running-aways/

Question: Should I Be Worried About Relapse Dreams?

I’ve been getting constant dreams about relapse, and it’s starting to worry me. Usually, I dream about being around my old peers, and they’re offering me drugs. I never take them in the dream, and I wake up feeling good about my choice. But last night, I had a different kind of dream—I ended up taking 20 pills, just like I used to during my addiction. When I woke up, I felt relieved it was just a dream, but I can’t help wondering: should this be worrying me?

Answer: Understanding Relapse Dreams and What to Do;

It’s common for someone in recovery to occasionally dream about drinking alcohol or using drugs. These dreams on their own aren’t something to be overly concerned about.

However, when these dreams become recurring, they can be a warning sign. They may point to underlying fears, reservations or unresolved issues that need closure.…

https://kin2therapper.com/about-recurring-dreams/

I’ve often been asked how one can overcome the stigma surrounding addiction. While there may be countless approaches to this challenge, at its core, it boils down to three essential principles: honesty, genuineness, and vulnerability. These are the keys to breaking free—not fearing the outcome, but trusting it all to God.

The fear of sharing your struggles often stems from anticipating a negative reaction or backlash. But this perspective only focuses on one side of the coin. What about the other side? There is understanding, support and hope waiting for us on the other side that unfolds overtime.

Overcoming stigma demands that we break out with authenticity and courage. When we choose vulnerability, we open ourselves to healing and connection. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it. And ultimately, it’s a journey of faith and trust—both in yourself and in God.

https://kin2therapper.com/the-stigma-2/

Hi everyone. Seems like the past couple weeks have been a pretty rough patch. I'm a little over 5 months totally clean and very involved in AA. Alcohol was always my drug of choice, but also did weed for a bit. Anyway lately I feel like I've been failing more than normal. I chaired a meeting yesterday and today and I let my ego get the better of me both times. Yesterday I got irritated with feeling like the meeting I was chairing was getting left to the wayside compared to the others and today I word blurted sort of jokingly that I would cut some off if they were rambling too long. I didn't even mean to say it. I just didn't take a pause and do what I know what to do. Also I've had to call more people recently when I get a thought of a drink or feel extra anxious than I did for a while. I want to be able to help others, but I feel like I'm only taking right now. I'm extremely grateful for all the help and support I've gotten even through all this, but I want to be able to give back more. I keep getting in my own way and I've still had some completely great days, but more rough ones than normal. Anyone else going through this or have you gone through this period where you feel like you don't actually know as much as you thought? Hope everyone is having a great day. Thanks

Just to make this short. I've been abusing substances for months (using for years, abusing for the past few months), I've tried to get sober several times, but I can't, I can only make it for a few days, couple of weeks tops, and then it starts again. And I feel more miserable every day. My life is falling apart and I cannot stop. I don't recognize myself anymore. I don't want to live like this, but I can't stop. I've tried everything: AA, rehab, psychologists, psychiatrists, everything. And I'm still deep in this hole. Has anyone been through this and succesfully come out the other end? Any advice? Please. Thank you.

Hello everyone!

My name is Deja, I'll have 6 years sober this coming May. I really found a connection within discord community groups during COVID. I wanted to share a discord server I helped build and currently lead as admin.

Recovery: Reborn from the Ashes

We are an 18+ community

At this time, we do not support pornography addiction

We strive to help all walks of life share in the journey of recovery. We are not exclusive to only AA / NA, all recovery styles are welcome.

Come on in and say hello!

https://discord.gg/4NjT5cESee

Do you start the morning in a rush? If you chase the day, it will oft times pace you.

How do you calm the rush within when the day has paced you? It’s all about a peace that unfolds as acceptance. You carry on without attachments to regrets of how you could’ve paced the day.

When there’s peace within, you carry on wherever the day finds you.

Do things that fan the flame of realizing peace within; the first of which is absolute surrender to God—in this, your steps will be ordered towards peace within, regardless of the calm or storminess without. You will be inspired to do the best you can in that moment without regrets.

Explore my site for more resources on recovery, guidance to overcome addiction and sobriety. Don’t hesitate to send me a message anonymously, seeking guidance.

https://kin2therapper.com/pacing-the-day/

quit drinking 15 months ago. Cold turkey. No withdrawal, no cravings, no urge to “just have one.” It felt too easy, like maybe I was never really an alcoholic. But looking back—oh, I absolutely was. I just didn’t fit the stereotype.

Before quitting, I even did a test run back in 2021—three months sober, just to see if I could. And I could. Smooth sailing. So I convinced myself I was fine. Then when the three months ended? I drank in arrears. As if my liver had been waiting for back pay.

For years, alcohol was my pause button. My permission to stop thinking. My reset after a bad day (or a good one, or an average one—any reason would do). But when I finally quit for real, I realized something: I didn’t actually enjoy drinking. I enjoyed escaping.

And the craziest part? Even before I got sober, I helped someone else do it. A friend I used to binge with. One night, mid-drunk deep talk, she broke down. I held her while she cried. We talked about quitting, about changing. A few days later, she left. And she actually stayed sober. She’s got at least a year on me now.

I guess I was always meant to board this train—I just took my time getting here.

Now? I wake up clear-headed. I don’t dread my messages. I don’t need “liquid courage” to be social. And for the first time in a long time, I am proud of the person staring back at me in the mirror.

If you’ve quit (or tried to), tell me—was it a fight or a free pass? And if you’re still drinking, what’s stopping you from quitting today?

If you've decided to lower your dose of Suboxone or perhaps stop completely, there's a nationwide research study offering meds and support from doctors. You need to be on suboxone for at least a year and not be using illicit drugs. Study doctors will help you make a medication plan and manage your progress, and the teams at each site offer close monitoring and support to keep you on track and prevent relapse.

Study visits are compensated and take place at the locations listed below. Reach out to a site near you to see if it may be a good fit!  

Arkansas: Little Rock: Center for Addiction Services and Treatment (CAST) – (501) 526-8423

California: Tarzana: Tarzana Treatment Centers – (818)-996-1051

Florida: Clearwater: Operation PAR – (727)-507-4447; Jacksonville: Gateway Community Services – (904) 387-4661; Orlando: Aspire Health Partners – (407)- 875-3700

Massachusetts: Belmont: McLean Hospital – (617) 610-2169; Fall River: Stanley Street Treatment and Resources, Inc. – (508) 324-3565

Missouri: Cape Girardeau: Gibson Center for Behavioral Change – (573) 332-0416 ext. 158

New Hampshire: Lebanon: Dartmouth Hitchcock – (603) 653-1824 

New Mexico: Albuquerque: UNM Addiction and Substance Abuse Program – (505) 225-6931 

New York: New York: Bellevue Hospital Center – (646) 501-4138

Oregon: Roseburg: Adapt Integrated Health Care – (541) 900-7434; Winston: Adapt Integrated Health Care – (541) 900-7434

Pennsylvania: Pittsburgh: Center for Psychiatric and Chemical Dependency Services – (412) 956-2503; Pittsburgh: Internal Medicine Recovery Engagement Program – (412) 956-2503 

South Carolina: Conway: Shoreline Behavioral Health Services – (843) 438-3161

West Virginia: Morgantown: Chestnut Ridge – (304) 288-6324

*Note that above locations will be edited by the sites as sites close enrollments for the duration of the trial*

You can find more info about the study here: https://clinicaltrials.gov/study/NCT04464980