Hi. Not sure how old you are, but I'm a parent of 16-year-old son with ADHD. (He was diagnosed 10 years ago.) In addition to the video, Dr. Barkley has had a book available for years titled "Taking Charge of ADHD." It's a good book for parents to use as a guide and as a referral. There's also a great website called ADDitude--you can search it by topic as both parent and child. There are some great articles on it and Dr. Barkley is a contributor.
Good luck with your efforts and with your parents.
I just wanted to tell you that you're a great parent for genuinely caring about your son's issues with ADHD.
Some parents don't care enough or just believe it is all poor excuses. They don't realize that there could be an underlying cause, even after being presented with facts.
As a teenager, I had this issue with my parents after stumbling across a lot of information about ADHD which completely explained the root cause of my problems I deal with.
Thank you so much. You have no idea what that means to me (and my wife). When my son was diagnosed, I got my hands on every piece of material I could on ADHD--we knew this was going to affect us also. I'm a laid-back musician and needed my time to write, but my son was tap-dancing on the ceiling--not a good combination.
I'll never forget getting on ADHD sites and reading the stories of parents--mostly single mothers--telling how they were at their wit's end with their kid's behaviour. Then I thought of the kids--certainly theirs wasn't a happy life either. The more I read, the more tears I wiped away and realized that the condition is so real, not something contrived by drug companies to sell their product and not the result of "bad parenting." In addition schools have a lot of self-edification to do in this area.
At any rate, parenting's not easy--we have 4 kids. And parenting an ADHD'er is even more of a challenge. But we brought them into this world, and they did't get to pick their parents. So we always thought we owed it to them to do our best.
Sorry to be verbose with this, but your compliment struck a few passions within.
I hope your doing well and managing your condition, my friend.
I'll never forget getting on ADHD sites and reading the stories of parents--mostly single mothers--telling how they were at their wit's end with their kid's behaviour. Then I thought of the kids--certainly theirs wasn't a happy life either. The more I read, the more tears I wiped away and realized that the condition is so real, not something contrived by drug companies to sell their product and not the result of "bad parenting." In addition schools have a lot of self-edification to do in this area.
AWWWWWWWwww... I love you so much. I'm tearing up right now. I'm not the OP / other commenter (just another stranger), but I want you to know that you are so awesome!!! I'm glad there's people like you. I turned 20 not that long ago and was diagnosed sometime during the past year or two, and holy cow, it sure was a struggle for me and everyone involved. Thanks so much for being you!
Well...I love you too! And you must be awesome also...especially if you think I'm awesome.
If I could do one thing, I'd love to have ADHD for a week. That experience would be invaluable in guiding my son. That said, Dr. Barkley's material (and the various like-minded internet sites) is the closest thing there is...
Hope you're managing your condition well and have lots of love and support!
Most likely they would read a synopsis of the book and it's ideas, be like that's super cool, I will bookmark to remind myself to order on Amazon. Completely forget or ignore the bookmark until months later when it's time to clean out bookmarks, remember how it was a good idea, and repeat the cycle likely. Or just get stuck in a YouTube black hole for 8 hours.
Okay, I see. I suggested the book because once my son was diagnosed, it was handy to refer to and I could make notes in it. But I sense you feel like you exhibit signs of ADHD and perhaps your parents aren't taking you seriously?
I am a 33 year old adult with ADHD. Sorry, I didn't mean to sound like I was putting down your comment, just that when I saw the word "book" my brain immediately stopped paying attention because I know I won't read it no matter how good an idea it is. I own about a dozen books on ADHD, ADHD and relationships, etc. I have never read any of them more than a few paragraphs.
No worries, I didn't take it as a put down. And for whatever reason I took you for being a lot younger-- nothing to do with your wording of comments, but more to do with my state of mind after a day at work.
I get the book thing though. My son's more visual and auditory also. And while I don't have ADHD, I, too, have about a dozen books I've started and not finished--lack of time.
Don't where you're at with your condition, but anything by Dr. Barkley is must-viewing.
yeah. it was nice to hear a succinct explanation but it doesn't actually help me with anything. i was diagnosed twice. once when i was 6 and again at 29. i only got treatment after my 2nd diagnosis.
I was inferring why /u/special_circumstances would have the glazed over look in reaction to the word "book", based on how I react to that recommendation. Its both a blessing and a curse sometimes, but you learn to manage.
Like the other guy said, I'd probably put it on my Amazon wishlist and never buy it, or buy it months later when I'm bored and looking through my wishlists. And if I ever do buy it, I'd probably read the first few chapters, put it down to go do something, and forget to ever pick it up again. It's just like the professor said about taping the paper to the fridge and never reading it.
I'm the parent of a 9 year old with ADHD, and I have it as well. While I can definitely identify with his condition, it also frustrates the hell out of me trying to teach him those things I struggle with as well. I need resources to help me, an ADHD adult, teach him better coping mechanisms and task/time management skills.
My gf suffers from severe social anxiety, really only able to fully get words out when she has a little alcohol in her. Really like I'm one of the few people she can really talk to, and she can't seem to get words out a lot of the time. She was put on an ssri for a while and it helped a little. Maybe try your best to describe how ou feel to a doctor?
Well than you're more like me. I've been told by my AP Chem teacher that I wouldn't ever do anything in chem. I'm now applying to pharmacy school next year. My gf gets so upset with me because of my lack of ambition and laziness. But really I just can't prioritize very well and I hate it. I can't really grasp what needs and has to get done and what I can do to avoid the consequences even though I knowfull well what all those consequences are
That's exactly how I am. I do fine on most exams but I'll sink my grade on a month long project that I started 2 days before it's due.
I've found the only way I can change the behavior is by forming new habits that out power the old ones. Instead of procrastinating about something, I immediately perform task x and reward myself afterward.
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u/clamsplitter69 May 30 '17
I've been in tears trying to explain this exact thing to my parents, but was never able to articulate like this man does