I haven't read it, but there is a book called "Some Things Have Changed". Ut's about Delly Duck, who couldn't take care of her first chick, who end up adopted, but now has another egg and is able to raise that chick.
Might be a good book for your daughter

That's great. The nursing school is just a thought, my friend got his degree that way, so just passing it along. 🙂

That's an awesome job to do, lots of hard work, but also rewarding. Also, know if you want to continue on the medical field some hospitals will pay for nursing school, usually the agreement is you work through school as a CNA and then stay on for 2-4 years as a nurse. And find a local orchestra to play in, when you graduate, I'm sure you music teacher can give you connections. Do what makes you happy, not what your mom wants or doesn't want you to do.

You are doing great and I'm proud of you. Keep up the music, I did oboe and flute in highschool, but was never great. If you truly enjoy playing oboe, you can use that to get scholarships to college, they are always looking for oboe players. Know that while your mom is failing you, you have people in your life who care about you, like your boyfriend. Someday you'll be able to build yourself a great chosen family who love you for you. Sending you some mom hugs

Your feelings are natural, it's not always easy. Sometimes I feel the same way picking my son up from daycare, but am starting to get closer to other moms.
I highly recommend counseling. It's so beneficial to have someone you can talk to on a regular basis about these feelings and how to deal with them so that they don't negatively impact you, your life, or your family.

I agree giving the BM grace. I just hope she does the same for us

Yes, it would feel nice, to have our feelings considered, but adoptive parents feelings shouldn't matter when it comes to the decision of an expected mom/parents make on whether to parent or chose adoption for their child.

Personally, I talked to three expectant moms (fyi they aren't birth moms until they have their baby and have chosen to go forward with adoption), before my son was born, the 3rd being my son's birth mom. The decision to parent or not is a heart-wrenching one, and they are making it both for themselves and for their child. We as hopeful adoptive parents can't add to that burden by asking them to also consider how their decision impacts us.

Talking to friends, family, other adoptive parents, and/or a counselor are all great ways of dealing with the raw and hard emotions that adoptive parents go through during their adoption journey. But please don't ask for grace or put your hopes of adopting onto the expectant parents, they are dealing with enough.

I managed to snag one of those tables (as always), with the window to my right, the 'counter seating' directly in front of me, and the register/serving area to my right. I was happy to get a window-side table, as i often cannot, and not have to sit at the counter with it's 4 stools.

Which one is it? Do you always snag a table at the window or do can you often not get a window-side table?

Fairly obviously AI written, in the future read through it and check for mistakes and add your own voice too.

I feel for you, that is so hard. My son was very attached to the binky. I tried cutting the tip off, and he ended up just chewing on it. So right before his nap, I dipped it in vinegar and then let him ask for it. He tasted it and threw it out of his mouth. I had water for him to drink after if he wanted and it took about 2 days for him to stop asking for it. After about a week and a half he was able to settle for naps and bed time as easily as he had with his binky.
It's been about a month, and he'll still sometimes ask for his binky, but he giggles as I go to grab it, and if I bring it back he says no, and laughs cuz he tricked me.
Hugs, I know this is hard, but you will both get through it.

We met briefly last year, b mom wanted her to introduce son to her. They work together, know each other longer and we met as b mom was getting off work. Also, there is the fb messenger history showing the conversation from last year,

That's my main fear with doing it, thanks for the insight

As someone else said make sure your child's PCP is aware. My son's said the big times to watch for complications are as infants, around 5/6 years old and puberty. I specifically chose her because she has experience with kids who have in utero drug exposure. I found her by asking other families who've adopted about their PCPs. If you're in the US, most states have an early childhood intervention program that provides services for kids 0-3 who have known delays, disabilities or diagnosis. So far my son has had minimal impacts, the only one being reflux as an infant, but it's nice to have specialist come out and check on him. Currently he has speech therapy once a month and physical therapy just moved from monthly to quarterly.

Got that after the adoption was finalized

Yes, there is just a section that asks about previous names, which made me wonder if I needed to include his birth name.

A name isn’t who you are. How you live is who you are

Very true, was mostly wondering cuz I'm filling out forms for his passport.

Yes, he knows he's adopted, well knows as much as a 2 year old understands

I did the same, I got a mini fridge, one that fits 12 cans or something and put the on my nightstand with the overnight bottles. We would wake up, I'd feed him, change him, and we went back to bed. He never cared if the bottle was warm or cold.

He's turning 2 next month, so currently unknown. I talk to him about his adoption, but people often comment on how we look alike. I just don't want it to become a negative thing for him

Does anyone have suggestions on how to fight this? My son looks more like me than he does his birth mom. It's complete happenstance, but I don't want it to become a think where people who know he's adoptive say insensitive things to him such as "Wow, you look just like your mom I guess it was meant to be".

How did you find this pediatrician? Are you happy with him? My first suggestion would be to talk to him about your concerns of switching to milk, but it sounds like you think he doesn't listen or doesn't take your concerns seriously. Maybe finding another pediatrician could help

I should vacuum or get something done, but I’m just sitting here, scrolling through Reddit. I’m not sure if it feels rejuvenating or draining.

Do whatever is rejuvenating, take care of yourself. Sometimes houses are a mess and that's ok. Also, I used to baby wear and do vacuuming and my tiny human always thought it was fun.

NAL, My friend who's kids were born abroad and continue to live abroad were automatically given US passports as part of the confirmation of US citizenship. They have dual citizenship, but the way he explained it was that because they were living outside the US, they got the passport. Essentially, since the child is a US citizen and are traveling (or living) outside the US, their documentation of US citizenship is the passport.

hero fantasy onto our birth mothers as doing a “loving” thing by “giving us up for adoption”

My son's birth mom choose adoption because she didn't want him going into foster care, and specifically she wanted him to have a parent to bond with from birth. Having other kids, she told me she knew how important the first few months of life are for bonding and that's why she chose adoption. She didn't want him in foster care while she worked the programs and got needed help, because she didn't want to then pull him away from those who care for him for however long it took. I truly respect her for that choice and we're in an open adoption so I know that will help my son to hopefully understand her decision.

I don't want my son to grow up with a hero fantasy of his mom that you discribe, but I do also want him to know she did make the choice because she loved him. Do you have any thoughts on how an adoptive parent can talk to their kids on she choosing adoption because she loved you and thought it was best without it becoming the hero fantasy?

At 17 months I transitioned my son to a toddler bed. Honestly I chose a toddler bed because it's closer to the floor, and use the same mattress as his crib so I didn't have to buy him any new sheets or blankets. I'm planning to transition into a twin bed probably when he's around 4.