Something about the dry-and-cold to wet or dry-and-warm to wet transition freezes me up and it takes me an embarrassing amount of time to go through with it most nights. And no, I have experimented with morning showers, but they're not very long hair- friendly.

I've experimented with using a camping lamp that I found in storage which at least makes it more cozy than using the Big Light, but its expensive batteries are losing power slowly and my parents complain that it's ugly...

TIA!

I’m a 27 year old full-time working mother with a supportive husband. I am a top performer at my job, always arrive early, and am thought of highly at the office for my organization, productivity, and communication skills. I’m likely thought of as a great mom too, my daughter is involved in multiple activities, always looks very cute/put together, and is a happy child. I’ve come to a point though where I hate weekends. I’m diagnosed ADHD and am prescribed 15mg daily adderall. Leading up to weekends I always have big plans for deep cleans and highly productive ventures, I tell them to my husband, and he even starts doing the things I mentioned.

When the time comes, I find myself staring at the walls overwhelmed by the logistics of how I’m going to do said things. “If I’m going to mop the floors, I have to dust first, but if I dust first I have to organize the toys, but the toys in the other room need to go to this container, and if I make a donation bag I don’t want it to sit in my car.. I should just take it now, but if I take it now…..”, you get it. Traditionally I end up doing absolutely nothing and hating myself for it. I explained to my husband I feel like I can only do things if I’m required to do them. I go to work and do well because we need money and insurance, I show up to my daughter’s activities because we paid for it and we have to attend when events are scheduled, but who is requiring me to mop the floors? Worst case, I just feel disappointed I didn’t do it.

Logically, I see all of the flaws in this mindset but no self help video or timer trick, to do list, etc has truly helped me. My medication is helping me write this Reddit post and I know within this time I could’ve probably gotten something more productive done. Yet here I am, frozen, can’t move. Anyone else experience this?

I, 33m, was just recently diagnosed with ADHD. Since I was a kid, I always felt that I was a little smarter than most kids. In the beginning, it helped me being popular and successful. But in middle school, I started feeling different than the others. I still managed to get good grades, but I always failed doing my homework.

The thing is, I always thought that I just have to try a little harder. Organize better and stop being so f***ing lazy. But I just couldn’t. Once, I started preparing my English presentation at 4am the day I had to hold it. I knew I had to do it several days in advance. I just couldn’t start doing it. Only when the fear of looking like a complete fool was really, really strong, I could start.

Luckily, I still managed to finish school and college. The first years at my job turned out to be quite successful. But I remember having difficulties focusing on the things I should do, and instead did other unimportant stuff or tried optimizing something that didn’t need to be optimized. Only when there was a deadline I finished the important stuff.

At my new job, it’s a disaster. I have days or weeks where I only manage to log my “working time” and that’s it. I just sit in front of the screen and desperately want to do work stuff. But I just can’t do it. Then I hate myself about not doing anything, which makes the paralysis even worse. At this point I just feel like shit. Now, I can’t enjoy any part of my life anymore and I feel this constant nervousness inside of me. I always hope that I can cry to feel a little better, but I don’t even manage to do this…

Do you know this feeling of starting a new project and feeling amazingly excited about it? I always had this, when starting one of my 1000 side projects. But now I’ve realized, that I never finish any of them. So I instantly get depressed and don’t do anything. Everything costs me so much energy. Every day feels like an exception. My life feels like a disappointment. So much lost potential.

Essentially this whole weekend I've done my best to give 100%. I procrastinated SO hard for ages, and finally had no choice but to do all my work this weekend. I'm so tired, and I was so stressed the whole time, and I barely managed to accomplish half of what I wanted to. What makes it worse is that I kept getting distracted, and I know I wasted hours that could have been used productively, but even that wasn't relaxing. It was maybe worse than just sitting down and doing the work, because my mind would be screaming at me to just get back to work the whole time. I hate this, nothing seems to work.

Just how I said my mum that am going for a party. She doesn't know any of my colleagues except for my manager and has never asked about them before.

But she asked who the party is for and I just got so... frustrated by being asked that for some reason. I was thinking that "even if I told you, you wouldn't know so why waste time asking me that?"

To be fair, I was trying to get ready to leave because I'm anxious about being late for something but its not the only time where I'm irritated by people asking me questions like this. Where the answer is obvious or not useful to them, especially when I'm trying to focus on something.

Hey y’all — I’ve come to terms that I can’t sit still to save my life. If I’m not fiddling with a pen, my hoodie strings, or the hem of my shirt, I basically float off into space.

So I’m thinking it’s time to start using a real fidget or sensory tool — on purpose. But instead of sifting through a million Amazon reviews, I’d rather hear from fellow ADHDers who’ve actually used this stuff in real life.

Here’s what I’m wondering:

• What’s your go-to fidget or sensory tool that actually helps you stay focused or calm?
• Any favorites that are subtle enough to use at work or school without drawing attention?
• Have you tried anything that just… didn’t work at all?

Also curious about the more stimmy/sensory side — squishies, textures, stretchy things, etc. I’ve heard mixed things about stuff like pop tubes or stretchy strings — fun or just loud and annoying?

Would love any recs — especially if they’re affordable, durable, or surprisingly awesome.

Thanks in advance — can’t wait to see what’s helped you stay grounded

my insurance requires me to fill my medications at cvs, but i’ve been filling at walgreens for the last two years for this particular prescription because i hate teva. it feels weak and doesn’t give me the same effects as other generics. now the walgreens near me is closing so i filled it at cvs the last two months.

the first month they gave me a generic made by amneal which worked great. this past month, it was back to teva. im honestly considering either switching to a different medication or requesting my doctor to prescribe me name brand directly as written despite it being a little under $250… i hate teva that much.

cvs tricked me into thinking they switched suppliers with that first month. why did they even have a different generic that day to begin with? don’t they have contracts with suppliers like teva?

hello, I need advice on what to do. I am 17 and I recently switched psychiatrist because I couldn’t go to my old one anymore. however after only 2 appointments with me and 1 with each parents, my new psychiatrist has decided to stop refilling my adderall prescription and told not me, but my parents she doesn’t believe I have ADHD. I told her that I believe I have it and she was pretty dismissive.

Before trying adderall, I was on Ritalin which I didn’t feel helped me, however it’s very hard to tell if my meds are working because I live in a toxic home environment and and am also diagnosed with depression and anxiety and have been on lexapro for over a year, and just now found out it wasn’t working because of my Asian genes.

Anyways I’ve only had a 2 week supply of adderall so far, and haven’t even taken it constantly because I’ve been such a mess so I can’t truly tell if it’s helping. However I don’t think removing it is the solution considering that I haven’t had a chance to use it consistently. I have to go back to school tomorrow after not going for over a month and I don’t want to take away something that could help me get back on track and not fall back into burnout. I had no idea that my prescription wasn’t going to be refilled and have spent all week thinking that my mom was going to pick it up but today I called her and she informed me that it’s not being refilled, as the psychiatrist doesn’t believe I need it.

This same psychiatrist told me I was being prescribed with Prozac but then forgot to send in the prescription and then proceeded to get frustrated with me at the next appointment for not picking up my meds, then she checks her systems and realizes that she was the one who forgot to put in the prescription. One part of me thinks this is all kinda unprofessional but she has been friendly towards me otherwise so I also don’t want to make an unnecessary decision.

Hello everyone,

I’m 26 years old and have graduated from university. During my university years, I isolated myself to focus on self-development, and as soon as I graduated, I started working. I’m currently employed, but I have no friends or anything else meaningful in my life. My relationship with my family isn’t good either—we talk for about five minutes every couple of weeks.

I thought I would make friends at work, but since I couldn’t find anyone on the same wavelength, it didn’t really work out. It’s not like I don’t take the first step—most of the time, I’m the one initiating—but unfortunately, I rarely get a response. Right now, I don’t even have someone I can grab a coffee with or share my thoughts with.

I keep asking myself: people around me don’t seem to have solid plans for the future or even jobs, yet they seem happier than me—probably because they have friends or supportive families. I tell myself this every morning: I’m working and earning money, but what’s the point if there’s no one to share it with?

Sometimes I want to spend money just to feel something, but I don’t even know what to do with it. I recently bought myself a nice computer—that’s about it. I get really jealous when I see people laughing or hanging out with their friends over coffee.

I wanted to go somewhere for a short vacation during the holiday, but who would I go with? I have no one. I thought about visiting my family, but since things are strained, I didn’t go. At this point, I have no motivation for work, or even for living.

I feel embarrassed asking these kinds of questions at my age, but I have no one else to talk to, so I have no other option.

Now what I’m asking from you is: how can I accept this reality and continue with my life? I’m not looking for advice like “you can try making friends” because I’m tired of trying. I just want to learn how to come to terms with this and move on.

Thank you in advance!

Edit: I'm also autistic, though probably more ADHD. Most of my friends have been on the spectrum one way or another Edit: obviously I'm not talking about all autistic people. Come on guys.

It's just a pattern I've been noticing. Has anybody else experienced this? I've been in situations a few times now where a friend who is autistic has decided I have wronged them on some level (and hasn't attempted to communicate this to me at all) and storms off in a huff until I eventually find out what the problem is. By this point they've already 'cut me out'. Is it just me, is my brain broken? I don't understand the self importance and not having the courage to communicate.

I realized I do this with my meds some mornings, where I’ll wake up and use the bathroom or something, then realize I need to take my meds and think about the process of standing up and taking a my pill with a swig of water.

Cut to 30 minutes of doomscrolling later, and I’m like “Good thing I took my meds already… wait, fuck.”

It’s not even just meds either, perhaps I’ll think really hard about sending a text In response to something and what exactly I will send, only to look the next day and find I never actually wound up sending it.

Same deal with appointments. I’ll just really vividly picture calling my doctor or scheduling online as I’m occupied (say at work or something) then later on when I’m free I come to realize I hadn’t actually scheduled anything, just thought about it in great detail.

It’s like by really contemplating doing it, and thinking of the steps involved, my mind just congratulates itself and assumes I’ve done it until I realize later on I had only very vividly pictured myself doing it and not actually followed through.

This is just one of the many things I refer to when I describe my symptoms as “My mind is just constantly outrunning the rest of me”

I didn’t realize how strange this actually was until I talked to friends and family about it, who seemed to have no idea what I was going on about. Like they just do things the moment it occurs, or they simply don’t think about it while not doing it, or if they do think about it they don’t sit there considering each step as if they were actively engaged in doing it.

My brain truly is my own worst enemy sometimes!

I'm a parent of an 11-year-old girl (Asian, Singaporean) diagnosed with ADHD, and I’m writing this with a heavy heart.

Our daughter is bright, sensitive, and incredibly sharp — especially when it comes to reading. She’s an advanced reader who often picks up teen and YA material, and she thinks deeply about things. But despite all that, she’s really struggling socially, and it’s starting to take a toll on her… and on us as her parents.

She has a hard time forming stable friendships. At school, her behavior has led to her being quite disliked. She hyperfocuses on one friend at a time, and has been accused of trying to "steal" someone else’s friend. She often wants exclusivity, unintentionally making others feel invisible. She also can’t stop herself from saying unkind things — gossip or criticism — even when she doesn’t mean to hurt anyone. We know these are impulse control issues tied to her ADHD, but they’ve damaged her relationships.

The result? She’s lonely and sad. She’s been made to feel unwelcome, and behind her strong personality, she just wants what every kid wants — real friends who accept her.

We talk to her a lot, but we know hearing it from a parent often doesn’t land the same way as hearing it from a book or mentor. That’s why I’m turning to this community.

We’re looking for self-help books that:

Are written for older kids/teens (she finds kiddie books patronizing)

Address friendship dynamics, social cues, emotional regulation

Are ADHD-aware

Ideally written by someone who has ADHD themselves

If any books helped you growing up — or you wish they had — I’d be so grateful if you shared them.

We love her fiercely, and it breaks our hearts to see her isolate herself without fully understanding why. She’s not a bad kid. Just a kid trying to fit into a world that doesn’t quite get her yet.

Thanks for reading — any suggestions (even a good coach/mentor) would mean a lot.

In practice runs I was told by a friend that I often miss the full intent of an interview question, because I hyperfocus on some given part and then just run with it. I started repeating either the entirety or even a part of the interview question and it's led to some positive results. Has anyone tried this or is this just an old trick?

Am I the only one who stops existing when my brain has time to think? Like physically im back in time but i cant change what happened , it's happened at least twice in the last week and I hope I'm not the only one dealing with this. Does anyone have any ideas that might help stop me from becoming a problem and can focus without the not being me?

Hopefully this makes sense because it doesn't to me

Just asking a question for those who had Covid - did you feel that your adhd symptoms became worse after you had Covid? I have long covid so I’m sure that contributes to it on a daily basis for sure, but was wondering if anyone else experienced this? I know there is still not much research, so asking for some experiences. Thanks!

I started coding and making apps/websites in 2019, I went on and off for about a year and then it eventually stuck, and now I have multiple projects.

A problem for me, a programmer with ADHD is that if you enjoy making projects outside of work, well atleast for me is that I keep coming up with project ideas, beginning them, and then completely forgetting eventually. Just today I've already started 3 different projects that never came to life 😭

The only way I can successfully make a project is if I can develop the entire thing perfectly in one day. This sucks :/

I find myself struggling to have conversations where I disgaree with someone without coming across as overly argumentative.

People can be trying to correct me and I hate it and feel like I'm not being heard. I think I want acknowledgement that my point of view is understandable BUT here's an alternative perspective without feeling like I'm being pressured to dent my own point of view? Does that make sense?

But then I acknowledge there are times when I'm wrong and I think I'm able to say when I am... but times when there are 2 subjective view points, I feel backed into a corner and lash out.

🫠

I am an adult male suffering from severe adult ADHD now in my 50s. I feel like a complete failure. I’ve had a hard time holding down work. The longest I’ve ever worked for one company was eight years and then I left that job because I couldn’t handle dealing with micromanaging supervisors. I got my degree at the age of 40 and into this day. I feel like I’ve accomplished shit with it. There are days I feel like I have no skills like I have no marketable appeal and that all I am is just a burden to everyone else. I am in therapy, but there are days for the depression gets extremely severe. I am also on medication and I’m diabetic so it’s like one thing after another after another. I’m not looking for a handout. I just hope I find people who understand me.

I never had or been diagnosed with ADHD. I felt I was more so the opposite of ADHD. A bit lazy, i was able to focus in class but I would get bored which I feel might be normal, idk but I never drifted off. I was more inspired, I had energy, inspiration, I was a bit anxious but never panicked attacks.

Now, I can’t think clearly, bad memory, I can think but when I talk the words don’t come out correctly or the way I want to say it. I have (social) anxiety which I sometimes get panic attacks from. I can’t focus and i daze off even if I’m interested or not bored. My mind fades away when people sometimes talk to me. I tend to do multiple things at once (might be because of anxiety). When I sleep, I feel like I’m missing out on something(I sleep with YouTube videos playin for a couple of hours)

I dont feel like I have adhd, I’m not hyperactive. I’m going to take some lab test(tb gold test, other blood/vitamin test, sorry I forgot the names) and a MRI scan. Would these test help?

That’s all I really wanna know. I’m very new to being medicated (Adderall XR 10mg) and it’s day 3 and I keep being busy in the morning to where I can’t eat till my XR has already kicked in. Is it better to eat and then take it? Or do a lot of you take your meds without food?

I am trying to make sure I get the most out if my dosage as I test it out. Thanks!

Hi everyone!

I’m seeking an ADHD diagnosis as an adult, after a lot of looking, I think I’ve found a pretty good psychologist to start seeing. We’re just doing a quick screening/intro call tomorrow. I sent a list of all my symptoms and personality traits etc. (unprompted lol but I don’t know what we’ll actually cover, and wanted to send as a point of reference!)

I’m just anxious that maybe I was wrong this whole time. Maybe the doctor will tell me I don’t have this. Maybe I’ll have to find someone new. Just need some encouragement right now!

And yes this is keeping me up right now, so hopefully posting this will help me get it off my mind and I can go to sleep.

Hi everyone.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD since I was in middle school, and since high school, I have always questioned myself why I’m different than everyone else.

One of the biggest things I struggle with is building friendships. I have “friends”, but I’m pretty much pushed aside. Anytime I try talk to someone, I’ll either be left on opened or given a mediocre response (e.g., lol) I’ll see a group of my friends hanging out at someone’s house and I wish someone could invite me. I have really bad anxiety about asking to be invited cause I’m worried people will think I’m too pushy.

Everytime I do something that doesn’t go the way I want it to, it’ll completely disrupt my whole day.

All of these things just make me feel like a terrible person. I try as hard as I can and no one acknowledges me or makes me feel heard and seen.

I'm 46 now and so far I got a positive diagnose on autism last year and am currently waiting for the ADHD gauntlet of tests ahead to see if i combo this out. In 2023 I just got a major burnout that kept me at home for 7 months and my therapist asked me if I had any data on my extended family mental health. So there I went and asked my parents expecting nothing of it honestly, never heard that being talked at home ever. And so it was that apparently my family is a very mentally healthy bunch (spoiler: undiagnosed). My father as I was leaving came after me with a folder from his file cabinet where he kept all records from me and my sister (everything, medical, education... every single minute detail). Apparently when I was 6 a I destroyed the weiss test with a result of 43 (at the time a 20 was considered a positive and 50 something the total maximum possible). The report ends with "high hyperactivity signs" and "but this kind of patients usually get better as they age". I did not, and now I'm absolutely livid about it even if it's been more than a year ago that I learned it so I had to share it here. Thanks for reading and if any of you has good tips to pass the time till I get my results (god knows when it's gonna be) I'll be glad to read them.

I was considering putting this under tips and suggestions but I am scared of being attacked but am very much open to friendly and helpful tips and suggestions. Anyways since around end of January, I have been stuck in bed. My will to do anything at all is completely gone and all I do is sit in bed, either researching random topics, doomscrolling or rotting away watching tv. Any routine that I once had, like even as simple as waking up and getting out of bed to make breakfast is gone. I don’t end up eating until the afternoon when I realize that I haven’t eaten all day. I rarely even brush my teeth (I know NASTY pls don’t yell at me), let alone do my schoolwork.

I am in my junior year of high school and am incredibly behind in school, failing almost all my classes. I honestly love learning and before my burnout I was an A and B student, but I tend to procrastinate and overwhelm myself with too many things and that I just completely shut off and do nothing. But this is the first time it has gotten this bad and now it’s April and am still bed rotting. Going back to school seems so scary now that I have been gone for so long and I haven’t done any work.

I feel like I’ve disappointed everyone in my life, my parents, my teachers and even my peers. The missing work feels like an impossible mountain to climb. On top of this it takes me double the time to get the work done in the first place because I am always getting distracted and am also a perfectionist. Even when I am doing my work, I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt because it takes me so long and I waste so much time in the process. I’m not sure how to get back into living a normal life and having a normal routine and just simply taking care of myself. It all feels so impossible and I feel like no one in my life gets it and they all think I’m just lazy. Everyday I spend in bed I grow more and more miserable and yet I am not sure how to escape it.

Yup, was wondering why my medication was more than I usually pay for, and I called my insurance. United healthcare tells me that they no longer cover adderall as stated in their formulary due to a few reasons. One of them is that is can cause addiction or be misused. For one, this made me mad because this is not new news, everyone has been aware of this. Second of all, at least inform your patients who are on this medication. I literally get a refill like every three months so it’s not like I’m dependent or addicted. United healthcare seems like they accepted the fact that they’re on the thin edge with everyone, and is just testing the limits because they know they can’t get any lower.

Edit: at least for my plan, I don’t know about others.

People are accusing me of lying, I swear to you, I am not. It may just be for my plan, but this is not a lie nor rage bait.