I know this is the sort of sub where people say stuff like "Oh! You're not at all old at 55!" or "I'm 74 and I can run faster than I did at 24!"

But in a society where people hope to meet their permanent SO by their 30s and have an established career by their 40s, what are you if you're middle-aged and have achieved neither of these?

Usually, in response to this, some of the more optimistic people will tell you to not let society define success or to find your own happiness etc.

OK, so what if you're 50 and you've never made enough money to buy a house or gone on a proper vacation or had a hobby other than reading or hanging out at the park. And now on top of the usual financial stress, you need to worry about medical issues, getting your next job, and trying to figure out retirement. Where is the happiness supposed to come from? How am I supposed to define success?

We generally accept the different lifestages for humans (childhood, teenhood, young adulthood, mid adulthood, senior adulthood, super senior adulthood, etc.). Nobody is going to argue that a 50-year-old can live like a 25-year-old, who can fail at something and just try again. So what is the age when we're allowed to accept we've failed at life?

Anything mentally or physically that made you appreciate aging more? I developed a more curvy body with age where I was a little too skinny in my 20s.

Hey everyone,

I’ve been thinking a lot about how society often tells us that women are most beautiful between the ages of 18 and 25 (I've included two memes that you've likely seen before to illustrate this idea). It’s like there’s this ticking clock, this unwritten rule that as we get older, we somehow lose our worth or our beauty fades. But here’s the thing: That idea is a lie.

This standard is rooted in a patriarchal system that has conditioned us to believe our value is tied to how we look, especially in those fleeting years when our prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain responsible for decision making and maturity) is still developing. It's an unrealistic and harmful expectation for us to be at our "best" when we haven’t even fully matured into the people we are meant to become.

What I want to say is: We have the right, the duty to ourselves, to reject this damaging narrative. Beauty shouldn't necessarily equate to youth (is a little sapling more beautiful than a 1,000 year old oak tree?), and it certainly shouldn't be about meeting the standards of a group of men who view women as subhuman. It's about how we feel about ourselves and the confidence we carry at any age. The truth is, beauty is subjective and deeply influenced by culture and personal perspective - what was considered beautiful a hundred years ago may not even be on the radar today.

Beauty is not just physical appearance; it's also the way we move through the world, the stories we carry, the wisdom we gain as we live our lives. As we get older, we learn to love ourselves deeper, become more comfortable in our skin, and express our individuality in ways that are uniquely ours. We value this trait in men, and it's high time we value this about ourselves.

So let’s throw out the outdated notion that our best years are behind us once we hit a certain age. Let’s redefine beauty for ourselves. You are just as beautiful at 40, 50, 60, or beyond, as you were at 25. And you don’t need to answer to anyone but yourself. Reject the patriarchal standards, and let’s own our beauty, on our own terms.

<3

Next week I turn 70.

I did begin my SS retirement benefits last year. However, I am working to supplement my income to pay for medical benefits.

Truth be told. I am tited of working at my present hob but nobody wants to hire someone my age.

There’s a lot I want to do but when I arrive home from work ( psyche hospital) I am mentally drained.

Don’t get me wrong. Overall I’m happy with my life its just that I can’t afford to fully retire.

Am I the only one???

Hey everyone! I wanted to share a recent episode that dives into the mind of one of climbing’s most iconic and introspective figures, Jerry Moffatt. Long before free soloing became a household term with climbers like Alex Honnold, Jerry was already pushing the boundaries of what was possible in the climbing world.

He was free soloing bold routes in Britain and the US, all before it became popularized by documentaries and social media. By the age of 20, Jerry had already conquered some of the hardest routes in the world often onsighting what took others days to figure out.

But what truly sets Jerry apart is his decision to walk away from professional climbing at the peak of his career. He talks openly about his journey, from the obsessive drive that helped him reach the top to the mental tools he used to perform under extreme pressure.

His unique approach to mental training using visualization and a technique he calls “pessimistic thinking” was key to his success, and it’s fascinating to hear how those methods helped him push his limits, both physically and mentally.

We also get into the deeper side of Jerry’s story: how obsession can help you achieve great things, but also when it can start to weigh you down. At 40, still at the top of his game, Jerry made the conscious decision to step away from climbing, and it’s a perspective that not many athletes have the opportunity to share.

His journey is a reminder that success isn’t just about constant performance it’s about knowing when to pivot, let go, and embrace a new chapter.

Jerry now focuses on practices like meditation and staying grounded, and he shares how those tools help him maintain balance and fulfillment in his life.

His story teaches us so much about goal setting, managing ego, and aging with intention lessons that can apply to any part of life, not just climbing.

Hi!

Lately, I’ve been feeling pretty insecure about my age. I’m (f) 28, and even though I know that’s still young, I sometimes get the feeling that others see it differently. Especially people who are begin/middle 20s—they act like I’m already “old.” But it’s only a few years’ difference. Then there are people who say I’m starting to “decline,” that my prime is over. Is that really true at 28? Or even at 30?

I keep seeing these videos on TikTok where women around my age show their faces without makeup or fillers, saying, “This is what a real 27-year-old looks like.” And even though it’s meant to be honest and empowering, I sometimes just feel worse. Like we’re suddenly being put in a category that’s no longer truly young—one that’s all about fine lines, aging skin, and comparison.

I always thought 28 was still young. And honestly? I still feel and look young?. But all these subtle comments, comparisons, and online trends sometimes make me feel like I’m losing something. Is it just me, or has this generation been brainwashed by social media, Photoshop, and plastic surgery?

Hope it’s ok to ask this here! Are there ANY body lotions or creams that ACTUALLY help fade age spots…especially on arms, legs, & hands? Any kind info would be greatly appreciated!

Has anyone had shoulder replacement surgery? I had both hips done last year and it wasn’t a bad recovery. Just wondering how this compares to shoulder surgery.

Fabulous conversation about aging between two women of these ages but both equally vibrant https://youtu.be/ooQZPIZCrQ8?feature=shared

I am only 58 but I am going through something and I don’t know what to do. I lost my Dad 13 years ago and I never thought I’d get over it, but I am doing ok. Now my mother is 91 and having health problems and it is getting real that I will lose her too.

I remember being maybe 8 or 9 years old petrified of the thought of losing my parents and now here it is already! How did the time go so fast!?

Then I think of all the years in my past and the fun I had and all the things that happened and I can’t believe how fast the time went and it makes me really sad. I’m sad for my parents because it went fast for them too. Soon we will all be gone. I can’t stop thinking about all this.

It is so hard to go to work everyday with these thoughts. Work just seems so stupid and pointless. Who cares?

Does anyone know what I mean?

*Edit: thanks everyone for all your responses. This kind of thing is really tough, isn’t it? Glad to know there are people who know what I mean. Hugs to all of you.

I’m 28f white, and have dynamic wrinkles under my eyes ALOT when I smile. And I can’t tell if this is normal anymore or if I’m aging at a faster rate than normal?!?

I don’t have Botox or anything and I have a good skincare routine. I can definitely work on my hydration but I can’t help but feel like I’m aging a lot faster than the people around me?!? I can’t tell if I have a warped sense because of social media, if so many people around me have Botox that I just don’t know what’s normal anymore or what.

But it would help to get some perspective on when it’s normal to see this happening age wise

Edit: okay so majority of people in the comments asked these questions so let me clarify some thing: 1) I wear sunscreen every day double layer before I leave my house and have been doing this for the better half of a decade now 2) when I say dynamic wrinkles I mean wrinkles that appear under my eyes when I smile they don’t stay there but every time I give even a small smile they wrinkle up bad which makes me insecure to even smile anymore. 2) I have a strict skincare regime including retinol, hypotonic acid, snail mucin for hydration, multi-peptide, even tone and lift cream, triple moisture repair and SUNSCREEN SUNSCREEN SUNSCREEN. I put spf 50 on and then another layer on with my makeup as I don’t buy any makeup without spf in it. So not using sunscreen isn’t the issue for me peeps 3) I probably could do better with my diet as I do eat healthy but not the healthiest. I will definitely take that into consideration as I move forward. 4) I exercise 5 times a week and wear sunscreen protective clothing from head to toe.

A villa and a tree house

I have read so many stories about people and stories about parents, where some being joyous while others being very sad. My Mom has a habit of putting the ‘guilt trip’ on me for everything I ‘cannot do’. I see her every Wednesday and spend the day usually doing everything for her that most of us in our younger lives take for granted. (Appointments, shopping, cleaning, giving her a shower, paying her bills and bringing her lunch amongst other things)

There are times when I cannot be there to see her. Things like doctors appoints that I may have or contractors at my home and just yesterday, called her to let her know that I cannot be there to see her on Wednesday due to my car being in the shop.

She will usually respond in a very sad and solemn voice something to the affect of: ‘Well God bless me if I am still here in a week. If not, you won’t have to come down from Maine every two weeks and spend two hours down and two hours back. You know there is so much that we sacrificed for you as a child and you tell me this?’

I am a very direct person after being an ‘editor in chief’ a good part of my adult life and could handle any and all issues from employees. But, I get this every time from my Mother which often brings me to tears even though there is nothing I can do about predicaments.

I know, that I should not feel this way, but I feel like I have let her down. On the flip side she does have the VNA twice a week and her neighbors usually come in for two hours everyday for puzzling. My heart strings have been pulled, my head is in my hands and I can only do so much for a woman that has given me so much.

Why do women get so scrutinized for aging? Aging is a natural, inevitable thing that will happen to us all. Why are women made to feel so bad about their bodies and/or faces changing?

Our society has glorified beauty so much that when someone doesn’t look the same as they did 30-40 years ago, they get shamed or made to feel like something is wrong with them. When this is what happens to each of our bodies as we age.

Our hair changes color, our metabolism can slow down, our skin loses elasticity, our muscles weaken, our body’s essential functions weaken, and we can do whatever we believe will “fix” it or attempt to slow down the process, but it WILL catch up. Our bodies at 70-80 will not look like or work like they did in their 20’s-30’s. Why are we made to feel so bad that are aging, as if we can stop or pause time? 😔

I am 36 years old and I have feared aging for as long as i can remember. Due to witnessing the constant ridicule I see online or in my life on others commenting on how “bad” others have aged, due to no fault of their own, except time passing.

We are human and shouldnt be made to feel BAD about living out our human experience in these bodies. Especially when we are taking care of ourself and doing everything “right” in terms of health, but still cant fight the inevitable fate of aging.

My Mom is 89 and due to be 90 in July. Something’s that I have found while cleaning out her house in certain areas were ‘expired medicines’. There are only 2 places in the house that I know of, where she has kept medicines: 1. in the bathroom medicine cabinet and 2. in a drawer in her dresser.

After checking in the bathroom medicine cabinet, which had all sorts of good stuff, which included aspirin that expired in 2000, and some other nifty ointments that were so long expired, they were hardened and were beginning to become fossilized. So, everything that wasn’t needed or had expired went in to the trash. This medicine cabinet reminded me of ‘the junk drawer, and everyone has one somewhere in the house, and it needed to be brought back to the 21st century. There were even some narcotics like Oxy and some other things that were out of my reading and comprehension that I threw out into a bucket filled with water.

Secondly, her ‘dresser drawer medicine cabinet’ was also out of this world. Expired medication from back in the 1950’s all the way up to 2019. Many of these different types of ailment pill meds I threw into a bucket filled with water, so they would disintegrate and not be found in pill form by someone rummaging through her trash or even at a dump site. I kid you not. The trash bag was 3/4 filled!

Lastly, in this dresser drawer, I found interesting items that I brought to her attention immediately. Now, I am going back to her father’s time or my grandfather and he used to be a ‘gold beater’ and made 24k jewelry somewhere in the 40s and 50s. Well, in this drawer were many pieces of ‘gold jewelry’ and 7 small gold bars. I weighed them on the bathroom scale, and it came to 8.2 oz.

The price of gold in the 1940s and 1950s was anywhere from $34 - $35 per Troy ounce. The price of gold In today’s market is approximately $3,035 per ounce. My Mom could have approximately $20,000 in a draw that at some point was destined for the dumpster. Or depending on how pure it is, could be something less than the hypothetical figure that I mentioned.

I took the gold out of the home and put it in her safe deposit box later to be appraised by a jeweler friend of mine. My point to this story, is be careful when cleaning things and throwing stuff out. It could be family gold!

Aging often seems to get a bad rap, with everyone focusing on the negatives-wrinkles, gray hair, etc. But there have to be some positive sides to getting older, right? I am curious to know, for those you who have embraced aging, what do you love most about it? Whether it's confidence, less stress about what others think, or something else, I did love to hear your thoughts and experiences!

Been a while since I put myself out there (Life Happens). Feeling old since I’m 29 and I still haven’t lived much. I have no idea how to put myself out there, especially after so long. I’m on the spectrum, so when women flirt with me someone else has to tell me after because I can’t notice it. What do 30 year olds do? All my friends have kids now.

I just tried to get my refill for my medication from my pharmacy online. Now mind you, I just picked up this exact medication last month and have 5 refills left. My pharmacy informed me it needs a prior-authorization. Which was done LAST month in order for me to pick it up.

This is not a controlled substance and other medications were tried before this one because drumroll I needed prior authorization so I needed to exhaust all other treatments before I could get it. Which I did. There is no generic brand for this medication and it's very expensive. 600.00 per month. I pay 20.00 with insurance.

I also have this problem every month with my inhalers ( I have COPD). I've been on the inhalers for 10 years. My question is has anyone else had this problem recently? It's only been happening since 2024 that I've had this problem. It's like they want to battle me for any script over 100.00. Am I not supposed to breathe??

And yes, I checked my insurance company before getting them to ensure my medications would be covered. And they are. My one inhaler is 700.00. 35.00 with insurance. Yet for the past year I've only been able to get 3- 1 month inhalers. So I guess I need to slow down on my breathing.

I’m almost 40 years old and I owe credit cards because I have zilch attention span probably and i am trying to take classes as I never have a career I cared about until now and im still fighting to have a fun life. Part of if is rebelliousness against the consciousness that once you hit a certain age you’re irrelevant and your lack of savvy and neurplasticity ( common thinking) and elasticity just makes you not as exciting. I feel just as exciting inside as I was when I was 17 and I was wild when I was 17 ( key word, inside) however kinda smarter but like I can’t act like people in their twenties otherwise I’ll be immature. Everyone around me has expectations of me, but isn’t maturity being able to discern what’s an expectation vs what’s you? I don’t know why but people think that when you’re close to 40 you should be like settled in life or pg cause you have kids or something. TMI, tmi. Has anyone experienced something similar and how did you navigate this dissonance?

I live in the southeastern U.S. where it gets hot and humid during the warmer seasons. It never bothered me much until maybe the last 10 years. True, I'm 60, and menopausal, but I don't get hot flashes, or at least not bad enough to notice.

I've always enjoyed the heat of summer and always said I'd rather sweat than shiver. As I get older, I find that not only can I tolerate cooler temps better, I actually enjoy cooler weather. That's great, but what concerns me is that I seem to have an extremely low tolerance for heat now.

For example, I was working outside (temp is in the upper 80s), preparing to clean some pots so I could transplant some plants. I emptied a few pots, and made three trips carrying them to the back yard (down and up a moderate incline). I don't think I was outside for more than an hour, if that, before I started yawning, and feeling tired, weak, and light-headed. I had to come inside to lie down and cool off.

I try to drink plenty of water, but probably don't drink enough, but I haven't found anything that says yawning is related to dehydration, so I'm wondering if it could be something else.

Has anyone else experienced this type of thing?