Literally just picked up an SNES so I can beat my kids ass at Mario Kart.
Fuck that new shit, where the loser gets all kinds of buffs and the leader gets handicapped. That's for sissy kids who are afraid to lose.
I stomped him for about an hour straight, then I let him hit me with a shell. Still stomped his ass, but he was happy with that shell.
I'll take it easy with him on most things, but when we're playing old school video games, the shit I grew up with (and got smashed at by my brothers), it's no holds barred. Try me at F-Zero, or SF2. No way, kiddo, you're in for a beating.
I can recall the exact timing to get a sub-frame special move in Super Dodge Ball with certain characters I used to do all the time as a 12 year old, but I lose my wallet inside my own home daily.
If you can't whoop em in real life anymore, least you could do is whoop em in snes. There's some value in knowing what a proper ass whooping feels like.
Mooning someone is actually probably the perfect misdeed to commit as a kid, if you're doing it right, it's hard to get caught, no adult with proper authority is gonna ask a kid to pull down their pants and show them their ass so they could ID the kid...
Principal: So what do you say girls, is this the ass that mooned you during gym class?
It's not the 90's anymore.... that could never happen!
Extended family playing Mario kart 64. Had never played it, but a jillion hours of OG Mariokart translated just fine, despite having not played a video game in 20 years.
Might have been a fluke, but took first, dropped that controller, and walked out so we’ll never know.
(Now my own kids are playing it on iPads, which at a glance looks like some complicated bullshit. No you can’t have money to buy a hang glider!)
I like this. Sometimes a child needs to be reminded that adults can can still virtually kick their ass every once in a while. Good for them to learn they can grow.
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u/ukeems Nov 04 '20
The joy of whooping yo’ kids ass in video games is unmatched! 😂😂🥰🥰