As-salamu alaykum brothers and sisters.
I have periodically came here and updated my current situation and it has assisted give a sense of community to a struggle that is very difficult to open up about in real life. I hope that this continues to grow and Insh'Allah more people can continue on the right path.

I continue on the right path alhamdulillah, even though there have been more difficult days.
May Allah guide us all.

Alhamdulillah, first and foremost, and blessings (Salawat) upon the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).

I’ve struggled with this issue since childhood, as many who began using the internet at a young age do. After Allah guided me, I tried my best to quit but kept relapsing.

My previous record was around 180 days, and I’ve now surpassed it with 200 days. I don’t actively count days but realized this when reflecting on the period. One key reason for this progress is gaining experience in what truly works.

Based on my journey, I want to share insights that may help:

1. Charity: This is my favorite one. I don’t mean giving $5 to someone on the street, I mean entering a business contract with Allah by spending a serious amount of what you have in charity. What this does is, when you have the thought of fapping, immediately the charity comes to mind in a sense of, Is it worth wasting all the rewards of that money for 2 minutes of dopamine? Of course not. The most impprtant part is Allah will for sure help you out with any type of sin you’re going through, as charity enlightens every aspect of your life.

2. Working on something: Seriously, just find something you enjoy working on and keep yourself busy, like business. This gives you strength and purpose, which kills the boredom that leads to fapping.

3. Being grateful: I’d say the thing that leads people to sin is being ungrateful.

   • If you were grateful that you have the ability to see, would you betray the One who gave you this blessing?
     
   • If you were grateful for the fact that you are Muslim, seriously, Allah chose you over trillions of other beings, Would you betray His blessing upon you?
     By being grateful, you can’t be a traitor.
     

4. Don’t lose what motivates you to become a better believer: Whether it’s listening to lectures, or hearing Quran recitations, the more of a believer you are, the harder it is to fall into sins. Just stick to what makes you closer to Allah like holding a hot coal.

I have more things to share, but to not keep it a long read, I hope this helps someone!

May Allah make it easy for all of us.

I am faping for last 8 years.But not continuously. But It get difficult to leave this sin. But I want to leave this and want to lead a healthy life. Is anybody here who want to become my consultant for a year?

I know everyone in this community struggles with the issue of pornography and/or masturbation. But from a female perspective, speaking on my own behalf, it’s especially difficult during the beginning of a cycle and ovulation. If comfortable, are there any sisters who are happy to share how they deal with overcoming those especially strong biological urges? Happy to receive DMs from SISTERS for those not comfortable commenting

Let me just throw this out here first to get it out of the way. I know I’m very weird, but I have a weird fetish, fetishes actually and I’ve had these since I was a little kid. I’m almost 23.

I have a nose fetish where I get aroused looking at woman, whether they are gay or not, touching nose to nose or Eskimo kissing or anything like that. I also have a certain butt fetish, it’s not anything oral and it’s not even anal either, it’s literally just butt to butt touching or bumping. Idk how or why I developed these but it’s literally became my new pn now, meaning I don’t even have to look up pn online anymore, unless I just look woman’s butts in general, or if I see women fighting and getting up in each others faces. I literally only masturbate to these fetishes.

Some of my cousins are attractive looking, two of them are my first cousins and in their mid thirties now, another is a second cousin in their late twenties. I have that butt fetish with all of them, and I also have the nose fetish with my second cousin but not my first cousins.

My first cousins live in Austin, or one of them did at least but now lives in Miami, while I live in Brownsville. Me and family would rarely visit when I was younger because of how far we were obviously, so it’d only be during family events or something. However there was a time where I wouldn’t see them for a very long time, I’m talking 5 years. It was wasn’t until late 2022 where I finally saw them after 5 years because of a relatives wedding. And since then I’d see them a little more often, maybe once a year.

My second cousin who’s in their late twenties, I wouldn’t see too often either, she lives in the area but I’d only see her on certain occasions.

I need this to stop, everything, the fetishes AND the sexual attraction. Sometimes my first cousins on Instagram may have videos of them, and I’d screen record and masturbate to their butts. With my second cousin I’d record her face or screenshot it and masturbate fantasizing about the nose fetish. But what’s worse is sometimes when I see any of them in person, I secretly record their butts, or try to record my second cousins face. Also sometimes I bump my butt against their butts and make it look like an accident, I also do this sometimes at the gym with women there but I don’t accidentally, I’d usually ask them to help me stretch my back or something and have them stand back to back with me with our butts touching.

Not only is this haram, not only is this so morally wrong, but it has gotten to a point where it almost feels like I’m sexually harassing them by recording or saying videos to my phone or accidentally bumping into them. My first cousins are married and have kids, I love talking and hanging out with my cousins and their husbands, talking about life or anything, and im close with their brother (my other cousin) and my aunt too. This feels so wrong and I know they’re attractive looking but I haven’t felt this way at all until I finally saw them years ago after not seeing them for years straight. My second cousin also has brothers which I’m close with as well, and feeling this way with her feels extremely wrong as well.

Let me clarify I don’t always think about them. It’s occasionally where I’ll think about any of my cousins ass and sometimes watch videos masturbating to it. I usually masturbate to random women online with the fetishes I mentioned, or sometimes “accidentally” bump my ass into another woman’s ass somewhere. Let me also clarify I would never hypothetically ever have sex with any of my cousins or want to at all whatsoever. Even if my first cousins weren’t married, I would not want to have sex with them, if I did hypothetically I’d regret instantly IF that ever happened god forbid, so I definitely wouldn’t, same thing goes with my second cousin.

For starters, I finally got myself to permanently delete every single video and picture I ever had saved of any of them, whether it’s one I screen recorded off their media or ones I secretly recorded in person. These are all just fantasies, I wouldn’t ever want to have sex with them, and these are all fetishes, and I’m not trying to defend myself here but these fantasies and fetish I have are less harmful. I fantasize nose rubbing or Eskimo kissing with my second cousin, or “accidentally” bumping asses with my first cousins or second cousins too. I don’t ever fantasize actually making out, kissing, having sex, having anal anything oral. But these are definitely bad enough, and in these fantasies about the butt fetish, I do sometimes fantasized about their butts bare naked. I only feel attracted to my cousins because of these fetishes, and with how nice their butts look it’s very hard. Part of me wishes they’d at least dress a bit better, but that won’t erase the attraction, it really doesn’t help their butts are good looking, I don’t know why I only feel aroused to these cousins, which were two of my first cousins and my second cousin. If I can get rid of these fetishes, the attraction will go away. I need help so badly and I feel so evil for this, this attraction needs to go away.

Asalamalaykum my name is zaid and I’m 29 years old I’ve been sucked dry because of constantly failing on No Fap have been addicted For thirteen years since 2012 and on the night of March 30th I fapped two times in the night back to back and then I fapped a third time the next morning on march 31st and 4th time 2 days later. Chi or Life Force is gone. I feel like because my life force is totally gone I no longer have a soul and even if I try to achieve my 90 day no fap goal again it won’t matter because when my life force is regenerated I will have two souls not one a freak of nature is this even possible the only hope I have is The words of Allah in the Holy Quran in which he says there is no change in the creation of Allah that offers me hope because the Waswasah of Shaitan makes me feel depressed.