I will be officially single for a year next week but have had a couple of flings and situationships on the side for the past months, and here are the things that I've learned so far.

1. Pay attention to the words people use when they talk about their ex, the people around them, and themselves. It's one of the first indicators of who they are as a person.
2. Inconsistencies are inconsistency. It doesn't matter if it's big or small; some people are consistently inconsistent. Vet those people out.
3. If you constantly have to prove yourself/ your love to someone without them reciprocating the effort, you're probably a backburner.
4. If someone wants to spend time with you, they'll find a way, no matter how busy or exhausted they are. A simple, thoughtful message would indicate how much they care about you and the relationship.
5. Love and respect yourself enough to walk away from relationships that make you question your self-worth. Staying in those relationships isn't worth the pain and struggle to rebuild yourself from scratch after a heartbreak.

Please feel free to add or agree/disagree on the things that I've said above. I would love to hear your thoughts and insight about this topic as well.

A community/group of people that's supposed to be inclusive and more understanding of discrimination, pero may nalalaman pa kayong pag bi dapat sa bi na lang. Eh pano kung gusto namin sa isang lesbian? Di naman namin ma-control yung past namin. Or who we like. For now, ikaw ang gusto at mahal ko. Lesbian ka man o bi or pan or whatever you want to label yourself with. Tapos di ko alam, jinajudge na pala ako because of my sexual orientation/SOGIE.

Like girl…I chose you. I’m here. I showed up.

You think I crawled through compulsory heterosexuality, years of confusion, internalized shame, and God knows how many identity crises just to be treated like -- excuse me, but -- a second-class gay?

And I get it. I get being scared that someone will leave. But why the hell are we the ones who end up having to constantly reassure your insecure self while you judge the hell out of me?

It’s giving: “I want a confident partner who knows what she wants”

But also: “I will punish you for the hetero love you had before, and probably after, me.”

Also, shouldn't it be, non-insecure women for non-insecure women? Or traumatized biphobic sapphic for ready-na-saluhin-lahat-ng-judgment-at-dapat-di-nauubusan-ng-pasensya sapphic? Anong Bi for Bi.

So what kung we slept with guys na? So what if nagka-BF na kami? So what if may tendency kami to still like men? Like, f#@%? Hindi namin ma-control yun eh. Tapos na. Andyan na.

Andaming nagrarant lately about their GFs na ganito, jinajudge sila ng biphobic jowa nila or sila mismo nagra-rant about their kawawang jowa na jina-judge just because hindi matanggap ang past or sexual orientation ni girl. And when the confused AF bisexuals ask questions or defend themselves sometimes, aba downvoted malala.

Ranting because I experienced the same judgment from exes na puros toxic. Parang lagi na lang, need ko to make up for something. Isn't it fucking ironic? You're insecure, you feel like may kulang ka apparently na never mong mabibigay in case "bumalik-loob" si bi girl, and in the end, kami na naka-relationship nyo, or makaka-basa ng mga ganitong comments or malalaman na may ganito pala sa community na akala namin eh ia-accept kami no matter what, we end up questioning our worth and ourselves din dahil sa ganitong mga pangyayari. Parang hurt people, hurt people na ang nangyayari.

Di na nga tanggap sa labas ng mga homophobes, pota double trauma pala kasi meron rin sa loob ng community.

TW: self-harm, threats of suicide

wlw

☕I just rejected my manliligaw and she got physical (was getting forceful, dragged me around, nearly choked me) because she was so hurt with my decision to end the courtship daw. Nagsasabi na siya ng masasakit na words and was threatening to divulge private information about us. Mind you, I was outside our workplace pa ha so hindi ko talaga inexpect na kaya niyang gawin yun in a public space.

I had to ask my friends for help and my friends also contacted her friends para mapa kalma siya.

☕Long story short, na de-escelate naman ng friends namin ang situation but when she went home, nag l*slas pala siya. Now she is hospitalized and sent me an email na she’s very sorry daw sa nagawa niya kasi angry lang sia daw that time 🤡 And gusto pa niya daw mag continue kami and manliligaw parin siya kasi di niya kaya kung wala ako.

☕Now I am so anxious and stressed kasi na hospitalize daw siya and sabi ng mutual friend namin, nag we-wait daw siya na mag sorry ako sa kanya and mag reply ako sa messages niya or else baka may gawin na naman siya. I AM SORRY FOR HER BUT THIS MADE ME SO ANGRY. Matapos niya akong i harass publicly and threaten multiple times, she thinks I owe her an apology?! Am I wrong for feeling this way?

‼️QUESTION: How do I make a suicidal person understand that I don’t want anything to do with her na, I want her to stop pursuing me na but she keeps threatening me 😭

I know it’s not my fault but I can't help but feel guilty kasi what if patayin niya self niya if hindi ko siya balikan? I know it’s a manipulation tactic pero ugh nakaka guilty parin and naawa ako sa kanya. But I know in myself na di ako papayag sa condition niya na manliligaw parin siya.

I’m also angry at her though kasi na manipulate niya na ang friends niya (na workmates ko 😭) na ako daw may kasalanan ng lahat kasi “pinaasa” ko siya when in the first place, siya ang nag beg, umiyak, at nag threaten sa akin na magpapakamatay daw siya if hindi ko i accept ang panliligaw niya kaya napilitan lang ako.

For context ako rin nag post nito sa Quarantine Tribute Tips na group sa fb and same person lang tinutukoy ko then and now: (I’ll attach the url of my fb post para my idea kayo sa history namin)

I recognize na we have a toxic cycle kaya ilang beses ko na siyang pina stop pero eto palagi niyang ginagawa. I know na mali rin ako sa part na tinatanggap ko siya pabalik once mag sorry siya kasi I’m scared of hurting her fragile feelings and I also have lingering feelings for her. Plus na attach na rin ako sa kanya cuz she is the first girl I’ve ever been with. Please help how do I make her accept the end of our courtship without her wanting to hurt herself again 😭

Sorry if masyadong mahaba. Was in a WLW relationship. Three days ago, she decided to finally end everything after one and a half year of healthy relationship. (With one break up around our 5th month together)

Additional Context: She's a closeted only child and her parents always asked what's her plan for her future (family and kids) because they never knew about us. Before, nagagawa nya pang iwasan ung topic but 4 days ago, she celebrated her birthday and while having dinner, tinanong daw ulit sya. Kasi nadagdagan na naman ung age nya and andon na naman ung bigat sa dibdib nya naher parents are getting old na rin. (Same reason ng breakup namin before)

A day after that, she messaged me na she wanted to make her parents happy. She even told me na wag na kami magkita kasi baka magbreak down lang kami. But I told her na gusto ko lang sya mayakap, and I needed to give my birthday gift. My birthday is today, and supposedly, kung hindi kami nagbreak, magkikita sana kami to celebrate our birthday.

So pumayag sya, I went to their house last April 7 to give the gift. Sobrang saglit lang and never din namin napag-usapan anong gagawin after.

Since then, di na sya responsive.Yesterday, I just suddenly saw her request to end our affinity sa ML. So I messaged her na iacut off ba talaga lahat ng connection. And sabi ko wait nya muna ako makauwi, coz nasa office pa ako that time. But my messages were never seen, until now delivered lang ang status.

Now, today's my birthday and last night sobrang bigat sa dibdib ko isipin na hindi mna lang nya ako babatiin. Hindi naman na ako umaasa na magkakabalikan kami. I just thought, after 1.5 years of a healthy relationship, 3 days pa lang kami break, hindi ba talaga ibibigay ung simpleng happy birthday :'(. Pero despite everything, iniisip ko pa rin na that's not her. And if hindi nya ako babatiin, it's because she wanted me to hate her para may motivation ako magmove on.

I'm gonna wait until 11:59pm today and after that, I'll send a message and I'll move on na. I don't have any bitterness and hate kasi I know she's hurting, too. Sya ung gumawa ng mabigat na decision to finally end this and sobrang hirap non for her.

Nakadeliver pa rin ung last message ko kahapon pero di nya pa ako inaunfollow/unfriend soc med. Now, although I expressed a lot of times na I don't wanna give up on her pero I have to respect her decision. I don't have the strength na icut off sya sa soc med kasi that would make her feel na ang dali nya icut off. I dont wanna do things that will affect her self worth.

But I'm wondering when would be the right time to cut of our connection? Or stay na lang ba na friends kami sa soc med since wala namang masamang tinapay between us? 🥹

Edit: I've already accepted na hindi kami end game. But of course, everything hurts pa rin when the break up happens. I'm just hurting more right now na ganon kabilis di na sya nakipagusap.

I think you guys already saw a post here regarding sa nonchalant mascs and I can say it's true HAHAHAHA naexperience ko sya now and we're not talking anymore (sya una nag reach out). Alam mo yung gusto mo ituloy yung conversation pero hindi na worth it :( For me to find out na inlove pa sya sa ex nya HAHAHAHA kasi nakita ko comment nya sa isa sa mga posts here.

Please naman, mag heal muna kayo bago kayo lumandi pls 😭

I'm curious about the opinion of the community regarding the recent issue of Heidi Mendoza being against same sex marriage and Sassa gurl dropping their support for her. What are your thoughts on this?

I agree that right now it's important to be united and push for better politicians that are progressive even if they're not really perfect but I can't help but frown on some people's opinions about LGBTQIA+ as some kind of "woke culture" when it's literally our identity and our life. Reading things about our rights as something that is last in the priority of this society is actually not it.

Guys, idk if pwede to dito but im just curious ano thoughts niyo sa pag NO ni Heidi Mendoza sa same sex marriage and SOGIE BILL?

here’s the link for more context: https://x.com/heidimendoza45/status/1909504287451021579?s=46

(sana maalis na yubg 300-character minimum) huhuhu hahahahaha jokehhaialksjakalslslskshshshshshahahahahaga

While I was scrolling for another manga to read—since who knows when Murcielago will update again—I suddenly remembered this Yuri manga that finally got an update. Naturally, I got excited and started reading it right away. But while I was reading, I have no idea why my brain decided now was the perfect time to remind me of the things she said to me. Was it the title? (It's called On a Leash, by the way.) Or maybe it was the steamy scenes? Either way, I couldn’t even focus because my brain just went rogue. Lmao, that woman is going to be the death of me. A big FCK to myself.

Hi everyone,

We're implementing important rule updates to address recent concerns and ensure a positive experience for everyone in our community.

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Pag magsasama kayo pano finances? I and my girlfriend, we are living together for more than a year now. Usapan namin pagmagpapakasal na kami ay combined na funds namin pero is it possible? In a hetero relationship established kasi medyo na ganun and the man provides. So in our case, would it work?

Context, we have the same job so same salary. Pero mas maluho siya sakin, mas matipid ako.

You meant something to me, more than I could speak out loud. Your presence cured deep wounds in my soul. You're voice brought me comfort when I am alone. The time we had together was too short. I'm sorry for being boring and unstable. I miss you. I miss us and our little plans. All I wanted was to be with you and do all the things we planned. A part of me wants to reach out and fix things but mostly, I am scared to be rejected by you and feel like I am begging all over again. I'm sorry for being too much, for draining you and not being able to offer something new or interesting that you grew tired of me quickly. My heart gets sad thinking about you but not being able to talk to you like before. Now I have to remember you for longer than I have known you.

d

napaisip lang guysss!! nag-base ba kayo minsan sa social status ng isang tao kung idedate niyo siya or no? like yung 'out of my league' kind of thing or baka kanya kanya lang talaga preference. 😭

haba ng 300-character ahhhhgggahhauahahahahahahahahahahgsgaha gsgagahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha

the title says it all haha. genuine question lang.

kasi ako yung top sa amin, at gusto ko sanang matuto mag-dirty talk sa kaniya. kaso naa-awkward-an lang ako na gawin yun kasi di ako sanay???? paano ba?? in tagalog o english??? baka magtawanan lang kami tapos masira yung momentum hhahahaahahahahaahah

wala lang... gusto ko lang makahanap ng gae friends na pwede kong maging kachikahan. wala ako masyadong gae friends eh 3 lang 🥹 sa loob ng university wala naman.

pass na muna sa mga bebelabs bebelabs na yan, dito tayo sa mga friends na nakakawala ng stress hihihihihihihihhihihihihihihihihihihihuhihihi

Hey everyone! 🌈 Just a friendly reminder to report any posts or comments that break our subreddit rules. Your reports help us keep this space safe, respectful, and enjoyable for everyone. If you have suggestions for improving the community, feel free to reach out via ModMail—we’d love to hear your thoughts!

Thank you for being part of WLW PH! Let’s continue to grow together and keep this space safe, welcoming, and inclusive. 💖

• Part 1 of my self-reflective comic about my own relationship troubles.
• Work and life has been making me draw less and less but I hope posting this would remind me to keep going!
• I also want to attract other artistic wlw/sapphic peeps T v T (MORE ART APPRECIATION AND ARTISTIC EXPRESSION).

i miss love. i miss being inlove. i miss caring for someone. yun bang magagalit ka kasi di pa kumakain, or bibigyan mo ng updates throughout the day, yung may mapagkkwentuhan ka about how shitty work is, yung sasamahan ka sa call kahit tulog kayo, yung mata-tag mo sa random posts. Hay sobrang boring na ng buhay ko. Ayoko na rin mag open ng social media lalo na ng tiktok dahil panay wlw content lang naman makikita ko at mamamatay lang ako sa inggit. Lord please :<

Breadwinner here. 2 yrs working since college graduation. I started providing for my family at the age of 19. Sobrang thankful kasi may supportive at understanding na girlfriend. Nag-iistay at never pinaramdam sa aking malas siya kasi breadwinner ako, or maghahanap na lang ng ibang tao na most prioritized siya.

Grabe, may ganito palang tao na nag-eexist na mahal ka niya kasi mahal ka niya. Kahit ang hirap kong mahalin, alam ko naman ‘yon. Paanong hindi mahirap mahalin, breadwinner nga- uunahin ang future ng parents/kapatid kaysa sa future naming dalawa. Ako nalang nasasaktan para sa girlfriend ko ngayon tuwing naiisip ko. Years pa aantayin niya.

Pero alam kong kaya ko. Kaya ko paikliin iyong paghihintay niya. Kaya kong iahon sarili ko rito at balang araw lahat ng masasarap na pagkain, magandang travel experience, shopping para sa magagandang appliances/clothing, komportable at fully air-conditioned na bahay, zero debts and lifetime worth savings ipaparanas ko sa aming dalawa ng girlfriend ko.

Ang sakit lang rin talaga magmahal. Ito ‘yong masakit pero may kasamang love and grit. Iyong mapapasabi na lang ako na break me, get me down on my knees, and you will see me stand to endure more of it, if that’s what it’s going to take for me to cross the bridge to abundance.

Here’s a message sa lahat ng provider na nandito sa community na ito, ma-bless pa kayo lalo. Maproud kayo sa mga sarili ninyo. Makakarating rin tayo sa buhay na maaliwalas.

Hello Chicks2Go fans! 🤣

Recently, nagpost ako sa r4r na looking for kalandian, with very clear preferences, may ice breaker pa nga para di awkward at may topic.

And yet, may magsesend padin ng request na out of the criteria and pagcheck ko ng history nila, out of age range, not femme naman. Or hi hellos message.

I get it, we’re all trying to shoot our shot here but if you don’t fit the criteria and don’t even acknowledge it, you’re not being brave, you’re being annoying.

PLEASE READ BEFORE SENDING A MESSAGE. ❤️

Hindi ko alam kung napapansin mo, pero lumamig na tayo (kahit walang tayo).

Noong una, okay lang. Sabi ko, “Busy ka lang, naiintindihan ko.”
Hanggang sa naramdaman ko na lang… parang ako na lang ang umaasang bumalik sa "dating tayo" (kahit walang tayo).
Nakakamiss yung kulitan, yung simpleng kamustahan na walang halong trabaho.
Ang bilis ng panahon no? Parang kahapon lang, sabay pa tayong tumatawa sa mga kung ano-ano.
Pero ngayon? Para nalang akong multo. Alam kong andyan ka, pero hindi mo na ako nakikita sa paraang nakasanayan ko.

Alam kong hindi mo kasalanan kung ano man itong nararamdaman ko.
Kaya pasensya na kaibigan nagkagusto ako sayo, nagulat din ako sa mga reaksyon at kinilos ko.

Ayoko ipilit ang sarili ko, lalo na't hindi ko rin alam ang totoo kong gusto.
Pero hindi ko rin naman kayang itanggi tong nararamdaman ko, kaya mag dede-lulu nalang ako...
Ganito pala kapag hindi pinili no? Sobrang nakakagulo.

Hayy! Ayoko na makagulo sayo, kaya tahimik ko nalang ilalayo tong nararamdaman ko.
Hanggang dito na lang, siguro. Paalam sa naramdaman ko.

Pipilitin kong maging normal sa harap mo, para kapag gumaan na ulit ang mundo mo, manatiling kaibigan mo parin ako.

At kung sakaling iniisip mo kung ako ba to - baka oo, baka hindi. Basta ako na to! HAHAHAHA jk

--> mula sa taong gulong-gulo, litong lito ang buhay ng bakla 🥸

It was a rash decision I made - sakit ko talaga to, hindi nag iisip ng maayos. Hindi mataas EQ ko like what others think. Hindi ako magaling maghandle ng emotions. I tend to shut down, deal with things alone. Pero when I had to deal with my emotions agad, I make stupid decisions. Very stupid, just like this one.

I'm sorry - I never meant na mafeel mo what you said na you felt. I'm gonna say it here: wala kang kasalanan, hindi ka mahirap mahalin. It was my fault for not being sure a lot of times. I tell you not to overthink, pero ako yung nag ooverthink talaga. I'm really sorry for putting you through this dahil lang sa katangahan ko.

You are very sweet, masarap kausap, sincere, caring and all. But, I messed it up. I did mean when sinabi ko yung 3 words kasi you really made me happy and feel special. I was lucky to meet you pero sinayang ko yon. I really hope the next person you meet is not someone shallow katulad ko. I hope na it's someone who's really deserving and would make you feel loved the way you want it to be. You're too precious para masaktan ulit.

I know you said na wala lang sakin to - pero masakit, sobra. I miss you super, and I'm sure na I'll miss you the coming days, weeks (probably months pa) pero I have to deal with this rash decision I made. I know it didn't end well. It's my fault and I'm really sorry.

I'll pray all the best for you. I'm thankful dumaan ka sa life ko, I was really happy with you.

PS. I'm really terrible with words. I couldn't say it all.

For context I love this gurl so much pero sometimes I felt like somehow she doesn't like na I'm bisexual. What's with the stigma that when you're bisexual you will just end up with a guy in the end. Is it my fault ba that I was attracted before with guys. Hindi naman ibig sabihin non na I don't love her. I want to be with her, she's the person I love the most now. Ang hirap maging half breed minsan gusto mo lang naman magmahal.

Delulu is the solulu only when it's about challenges life is throwing at you!!! Not about that one girl you've been talking to for a month!!!

Ah sorry, need ko lang I remind sarili ko and mga kapwa ko delulu jan. Stop it beh di sila nagpaparinig sayo, if they wanted to they would've done it already!!! (Unless avoi-- JOKE LANG still the same principle)

guys gusto niyo ba playlist from delulu stage to falling to nasaktan ka na heheheh dm niyo aq for it

Gusto ko lang itanong if valid ba tong nararamdaman ko… hindi ko kasi alam if sobra na akong na huhurt or nag iinarte lang ako.. Pasensya na if mahaba. Sana yung mga nasa long term relationship maka tulong sa akin.

For context: Im in a long term relationship, 7 years na. Actually im planning to propose on September 2025. I have the ring na, na matagal kong pinag ipunan. We are both in our 30s & mas matanda sa akin yung partner ko ng 6 years. We’re aslo both working in medical field. She was diagnosed with depression & bipolar disorder so most of the time, im the one receiving all of her frustrations & mood swings. Femme & masc dynamic. Type A dominant & gentle supportive dynamic din.

Minsan, nasasagad na ako & napapagod kakaintindi sa paguugali niya to the point na gusto ko ng makipag hiwalay. She always makes me feel unheard & disrespected. Madalas nag tatalo kami kasi may mga bagay siyang nire-require sa akin pero hindi naman niya magawa sa relasyon namin( for example, simple updates ng whereabouts kahit magkagalit or kung late makakauwi dahil toxic sa shift). Pag siya ang gumawa dapat intindihin ko pero if hindi ko nagawa yun at my end malaking pagtatalo or isusumbat niya sa akin yun. I always try to tell the things that hurt me sakanya pero iniinvalidate niya yun tapos biglang siya na ang may sama ng loob or ibabalik niya ang past mistakes ko sa akin (like being over friendly or walang boundaries sa friends).

What provoked me to make this post is because nag kasamaan kami ng loob nung isang araw so hindi kami nag uusap pero i always make sure n i send her my whereabouts. Pero siya, umalis pala ng bahay tapos pumunta dun sa friend namin without even messaging me her whereabouts. Nalaman ko lang kasi nag upload yung common friend namin na yun ng selfie nila sa fb story.

I am so hurt right now & bumabalik yung mga repressed emotions ko sakin. Ayaw ko naman ikwento yung mga ganitong things sa friends ko at ayoko naman idamay sila sa problema namin at isa pa wala akong gay friends. Lahat straight so hindi ko alam if yung ganitong dynamics is common ba sa straight people vs wlw couples.

Kung umabot ka magbasa dito salamat, sana mabigyan mo ako ng insight.

Hi everyone!

Starting today, posts tagged with "Rant/Vent" and "No Advice Needed" will now be automatically locked. This means comments will be disabled on these posts by default.

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