r/howtonotgiveafuck • u/kingfubberknuckle • 2d ago
Revelation How to not gaf
Hey guys first post here because I am struggling a little because I am so insecure that I literally never try anything at all cuz I don’t want to suck at it. I am even ashamed and stressed when I walk and how I breathe. I have been SA’D before idk if that has anything to do with it. Any tips would be nice!
11
4
u/Talking_Duckie 2d ago
I’m sure your SA has impacted your life. There’s a lot of potential baggage that gets created with that. I hope you talk to a therapist or really anyone who can help you work through that.
I’m also sure the way you walk and how you breathe are fine. Don’t be so hard on yourself, the world will always do that for you.
I truly hope you’re okay 💕
3
u/kingfubberknuckle 2d ago
Really apprieciate it! I have talked to a Therapist and it is going better then it did I still get nervous when people walk behind me. I really apprieciate the kind words ❤️
5
u/Talking_Duckie 2d ago
You’re welcome! Most people are busy thinking about their own insecurities and being worried about the ways they are that they probably aren’t even noticing other people, for the most part. I just try to ignore the intrusive thoughts cause fuck it.
3
u/Hot-Butterfly-8024 2d ago
Your trauma describes you, but it doesn’t have to define you. Try to find that spark of anger and feed it your fear. Live in defiance to those who have hurt or judged you. The rest of your life is yours to live, so the question becomes, “What now?”
2
u/homo_incognitus 2d ago
Honestly I sorta know how that feels - can't say Ive found a foolproof way out of it but - what works temporarily at least - its not really valuing the people that are around you , realise they aren't any better than you and have their own flaws , get out of your head and focus on something else in public situations , if you value people less you're less aware of their opinions and the urge to seek validation or control how they perceive you decreases a bit
2
2
u/vaustin89 1d ago
I do have that kind of anxiety when I grew up, as I got older I kinda made my "dumbassery" a badge of honor. I don't feel anxious or embarrassed that I don't know something, kinda makes you humble and not really give a fuck since you know you really don't need to prove yourself to anyone.
2
u/numbruMC 1d ago
Here’s a tip, keep this up. This took courage. This took action. This was a choice. So do something again. Then you have a streak. A streak that you started and you control. Now celebrate! Today is day 1! Then celebrate day 3. Then day 6 and so on! I celebrate with visiting a new coffee shop or buying a new plant. I empathize with you not wanting to suck. That comes from expectations. But who’s “expecting” anything? You make the rules to this game. I hope you can free yourself from the expectations and embrace your effort. Rooting for you!
1
u/kingfubberknuckle 1d ago
Wow that’s really good advice thanks!
1
u/numbruMC 1d ago
I just watched this video this morning on my walk and thought it may resonate. I think the 15 minute mark will resonate. I have ZERO affiliation, just one last share on this topic. Hate to see people stuck. Be nurtured by the following…https://youtu.be/iauon8Kdcbw?si=EkC3MysQor7JtfbE
1
•
u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Thank you /u/kingfubberknuckle for posting!
For those reading this message, consider joining our discord server!
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.