The cool thing about it though is that you know a lot of random things that other people don't. People with ADHD have very unique personalities because they are made up of a lot of interests.
The only question though is how much time we were interested in a subject before we moved on to something else, so sometimes our knowledge on something can be superficial, but we're usually knowledgeable or informed on most things.
This is exactly how my ex was too. He had really bad ADHD and I didn't realize it would have an impact on the relationship when he mentioned he had it.
He would hold off on school work until the last minute and, on top of constantly being stressed, he would have no time for me because he would wait to do everything during the only times we could actually see each other. He would spend one full day making one little poster I could finish in 15 minutes. He would always forget about my birthday and holidays. He would repeat the same things I told him, as if I never said them to begin with. He would tell me the same interesting and unusual facts over and over again. If he managed to get engrossed in something then all of his time was directed at that one thing, and he would spout out random stuff about it constantly. He was always freaking out about the future but would do nothing about it.
I was always there to help him with the stress, anger, and hard times. And he let me go regardless of me sticking with him through how bad his ADHD really was.
I've been on the other side of this exact relationship. This was heartbreaking to read.
The relationship ended semi-mutually due to problems related to an international border that ultimately made living together impossible. But, when we did live together, my problems strongly contributed to our problems.
I'm almost 30 and I still can't do the necessary things to start a career going.
He said I deserved much more, but he later admitted he broke it off for selfish reasons. A relationship was just too much for him to handle since he struggled to just handle daily tasks. My friends always said I was the most patient and forgiving person though, so I never understood how I could have added stress when I thought I was eliminating it. I did all I could, but I hope he is able to find someone as patient again.
It adds stress because we know the things we do hurt you, and if we love you, stressing out about what we might do to you just compounds the rest of the stress, even if we know you won't mind or be supportive etc. A lot of the stress comes from overthinking and hypothetical situations
Yea he did think he was making me miserable. And the overthinking and hypothetical situations are bringing back some memories. It makes a lot more sense now knowing his ADHD played a huge part in everything that went wrong.
This is exactly me. I can recall random bits of information in meetings but as soon as my supervisor asks me to summarize a meeting I just got out of I just sit there with a stupid look on my face because I can never remember the specific details.
I also suck at telling stories or jokes because I get hung up on the absolute stupidest details and am constantly fumbling over my thoughts or trying to come up with the perfect word when any number of them would do.
I too feel like I just know things, how things work, the science and logic. But for fucks sake I just don't remember things that I read or watch or learn unless I repeat them constantly and for a very very long time.
This is me. I hate it and love it. I was diagnosed years ago and I pretended it was bullshit for a whIle. Amphetamines aren't a sustainable fix though and that is irritating because I would just like to get rid of my ADD. I wish I could do things. Inattentive type is so hard to explain. It's like your brain is in purgatory for half of the day.
Your comment somehow really blows my mind. I was diagnosed with Auditory Memory Processing Disorder as a child and ADHD in High School. I never attributed it to my executive function. I know a TON of random shit.... Sometimes I think I must come off as a know it all, bc I'm able to chime in during any conversation with random facts regarding whatever subject is being discussed. Never thought to connect the two.
Yeah, all that bouncing around on the internet ends up making you too knowledgeable sometimes in conversations. I've learned that people end up feeling insecure if you come off as too intelligent. Most people operate at an A to B level, they don't go beyond that and make connections between things, or ask "what if?" People with ADHD tend to be good at seeing how things fit together in a larger context, and can develop relationships between ideas or concepts well because they're equipped with a lot of random knowledge.
I think part of it is because we move along branches in search of stimulating information, so we learn how things are connected more broadly so we can navigate information and ideas in search of something new or exciting.
Other people tend to live inside their brains locally, going from one task to another. ADHD people venture all over the place, like we're flying through the atmosphere of our imaginations and any stimuli available to us.
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u/crwilso6 May 30 '17
The cool thing about it though is that you know a lot of random things that other people don't. People with ADHD have very unique personalities because they are made up of a lot of interests.
The only question though is how much time we were interested in a subject before we moved on to something else, so sometimes our knowledge on something can be superficial, but we're usually knowledgeable or informed on most things.