what was your diagnoses? Cause I'm the same way, laid back, can sometimes get lost in games or shows for plenty of time, but with most things it's like people describe above, doesn't matter if i prepare, things are getting done at the last possible second, always, and they have to be emergencies
This pretty much describes me. Got diagnosed and tried Adderall XR, regular adderall and now Vyvanse. Vyvanse seems to work the best because I could feel the addiction quickly building on the Adderall, even the XR. The immediate "burst" of "omg i can get shit done" is great but something about it felt very unhealthy. Vyvanse isn't really like that, it also has, for me, very little of the over the top energy. I just get going and get stuff done more regularly and find myself drinking substantially less caffeine.
I started work full time almost 5 months ago and the amount of caffeine I have consumed is probably unhealthy. Being at school I managed to get by because I could extend assignments out weeks but in the working world deadlines are usually next day. So to get motivated I need some kind of kick like caffeine.
I saw a school psychologist for a couple sessions and she said I have the signs of ADHD but I should get tested. Well I have never gotten the motivation to get tested so here I am, still crushing 6-7 coffees a day.
It took nearly getting divorced and not being the father I needed to be to my twin babies to finally go get diagnosed. I don't think I have it as severe as some people to have made it as long as I did and be fairly successful at work. If I had a deadline where it was my ass on the line I would find a way to get it done, even with procrastination still mixed in.
Either way, I will say the meds only help as much as you let them. My ADD is nearly fully controlled if I have good sleep + meds. I find sleep to be crucial, beyond to obvious.
I've tried friend's Adderall and Vyvanse before and I got things like I had never done before. It felt like the motivator in my brain was finally unlocked and couldn't believe how easy it was to do the simplest things. I just don't want that to come across as me having "abused" drugs before.
I took Vyvanse and I hit euphoria. I was the happiest I've ever been and would not stop talking to myself because I had no one else to talk to. I got so much shit done that when I came back down i threw out the rest of the pills. That feeling is dangerous.
I read once that this is why antidepressants can cause someone to commit suicide. Part of depression is a lack of motivation to do anything. For some people, the drugs bring the motivation back before they get rid of the desire to commit suicide.
Find a mental health psychiatrist near you and just schedule and appointment if you have the means to do so. Mention as much as you want to them, they're there to help you, not judge you. After you describe your feelings and problems, if you feel like saying "I tried a friend's Vyvanse once and It really did seem to help" and you can quantify X, Y and Z things in your life that really seemed demonstrably better it may be valid input.
I have been meaning to make an appointment and have a litany of problems in my life (both past and present) that stem from my inability to just get things done.
I mean I still haven't created an account with the electric company for my apartment after two months and it was supposed to be done when I moved in. Work is getting increasingly difficult because I'm letting deadlines slide, and never mind I barely graduated with a 2.091 in my major (minimum 2.0 to graduate) because I chose the hardest major that requires the ability to get hours and hours of work done a day.
Sounds like you're afraid of what may or may not be found out and you're upset, but comfortable with the way things are right now because it's the world you know and have come to accept.
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u/[deleted] May 30 '17
what was your diagnoses? Cause I'm the same way, laid back, can sometimes get lost in games or shows for plenty of time, but with most things it's like people describe above, doesn't matter if i prepare, things are getting done at the last possible second, always, and they have to be emergencies