r/LinkedInLunatics • u/Drogatog • 3d ago

First.

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2.0k Upvotes

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1.6k

u/Eastiegirl333 3d ago

I’m kind of a big deal.

572

u/icsnapper 3d ago

I have many leather bound books

364

u/LandoLebowski 3d ago

And my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

121

u/HighFlyingCrocodile 3d ago

Also a dead body.

37

u/NunsNunchuck 3d ago

Do you have to return some video tapes too?

7

u/MoreRamenPls 3d ago

You’re not really blonde are you?

63

u/Used_Lawfulness748 3d ago

The dead prostitute is actually in the trunk of his car.

That’s why he keeps a team of high-powered lawyers on retainer.

17

u/bananaz_to_the_moon 3d ago

lets see Paul Allen's dead trunk prostitute

12

u/Major_Section2331 3d ago

Tesla’s have two trunks on most models, right? You don’t think do you… 🤔

God how many bodies does Elon have in his trunks? 😳

10

u/Hamblerger 2d ago

It's really more of an eventual cremation service.

1

u/Bibblegead1412 2d ago

Yep. it'd be in the 'frunk'.

1

u/EnvironmentalGift257 2d ago

It’s just bodies, all the way down. And if you think that’s bad you should ask Garth Brooks where the bodies are.

1

u/CyrusOverHugeMark77 2d ago

He does look like Cyril from Archer, now that you mention it.

1

u/faerie-childe 2d ago

Let me tell you how a dead prostitute in my trunk can help with B2B sales

1

u/cammiehanako 23h ago

You killed a hooker! Cyril: Call girl! Archer: No, Cyril! When they're dead, they're just hookers.

Wait! Wrong show

1

u/mikeshamrock 2d ago

Though to be honest that might just be his natural body odor