I have spent entirely too much time absorbing true crime shit, because if I saw this I'd immediately assume there's a dead hooker buried somewhere nearby.
Maybe my mother in law is right. Maybe I do need Jesus.
Nah, I'm with you on this one. This is the kind of situation where I'd call the police non-emergency number. 99% chance, it's nothing. 1% chance, the police would want to know. In the 99% chance, they send out two patrol officers who aren't doing anything interesting, they look around, find nothing, and that's that. As long as you say "the only thing I've found are two heels" and don't claim there's a body if you haven't seen one, it's not filing a false report as you are telling the truth.
I mean. Just because a cursory search of the area turned up no corpses doesn't mean there definitely couldn't be a dead body there. It happens all the time in wooded areas. Remains sometimes go undetected for years and years, only to turn up in or near the exact area where the searches were originally performed. It would also be harder to spot anything suspicious if, say, the body was disposed of in pieces. Individual limbs and stuff are smaller and would be less noticeable than an entire corpse.
But the most likely answer is some drunk girl was trying to take a shortcut through the area and she decided to take her shoes off because stripper heels in a wooded area would probably be pretty cumbersome, and she forgot to take them with her because drunk people do dumb shit.
For your first paragraph, I was agreeing with you. I think there is a non-negligible possibility that there is a body somewhere. I'm just saying leave your analysis out of the police report, they can make that conclusion themselves. Additionally, "there could be a body" isn't wrong, so while I would stick to the facts, adding that wouldn't make it a false report either.
....I never said I would share my unsubstantiated intrusive thoughts in a police report, just tongue in cheek describing how a bit of a true crime overdose can make you think about some weird and paranoid stuff. I'm not going to report a dead body unless I have a reason to. It was a joke.
I'm still lost on why you seem to think I'm making accusations of you when I am just agreeing with you and adding more. I thought your comment was rational and realistic enough that I didn't take it as a joke, and wanted to reassure you that you aren't paranoid nor have ruined your mental status by consuming true crime. I'm not sure how to be more explicit than I was in my last comment when I said "I was agreeing with you."
.......I am unreasonably impressed that you seem to have tracked down the specific stripper that belongs to a random pair of shoes found in a wooded trail with no context. Seriously.
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u/SoldMySoulForHairDye 8d ago
I have spent entirely too much time absorbing true crime shit, because if I saw this I'd immediately assume there's a dead hooker buried somewhere nearby.
Maybe my mother in law is right. Maybe I do need Jesus.