I have been watching quite a few romantic movies lately and I have noticed that in almost every single one, either the protagonist or the love interest end up cheating on their current partener in the name of "true love". It's always framed in such a way that we are happy about it and don't really see it as something bad, even tho it should be .

Every Christmas romance is always busy person from a busy city comes back to their little town where they meet their highschool ex. Their ex is full of life and joy and Christmas spirit unlike the cold un-jolly actual partener. So the main character either starts an emotional affair with the ex or a straight up full affair. The movie culminantes with the main character breaking the heart of their partener in favor of their ex and that s supposed to be THE HAPPY ENDING.

And it isn't just Christmas movie, basically most romantic movies of any kind have some sort of cheating premise. why? if they want to convey that you are never gonna be happy with a partener that doesn't match your vibe or whatever and to not settle for an ok relationship and go for something great, THEY CAN MAKE THE COUPLE BREAK UP FIRST. Why do they always have to realise their true love WHILE with someone else?? Why are we justifying the fact that the character cheated?

In conclusion, it s annoying, predictable, and stupid . Make the character break up their relationship before starting an emotional/physical affair. It will make the movie more enjoyable if I don't have to feel bad about the innocent 3rd party who gets cheated on.

Like most people, I need to grocery shop to live. I work 9-5, M-F, so most of my grocery shopping happens on weekends…along with most other people. The result? Everyone and their dog is at Costco.

I don’t love any of the grocery stores. If I was swimming in gold I would shop at local grocery stores, but Costco is Cost-effective, so Costco it is. Most other people that go there I guess feel the same way. That’s a problem, because, for me at least, that many people aimlessly pushing carts around, taking their sweet time and not being aware of others around them is the most aggravating thing in the world.

People seem to lose all sense of etiquette when they scan their cards and walk through those doors. It’s like Costco zombification. Oh sure, take up the whole aisle with your family of 8. Leave your cart in the middle and obstruct other people. Oh yeah, you can park there right in front of the entrance. It’s okay that you sneezed on the produce…

I was simply acknowledging what you said. A simple word to gesture I’m listening. I’m no way saying what turmoil you’re experiencing is normal. Or that you should delight In the predicament you’re in.

Why does this simple word offend you so much you have to start an argument over it? Shut the f*ck up and acknowledge the context of how it was used.

Edit: not that ‘ok’ is the only thing I say. Just seems to be a trigger for some people.

Jesus fucking Christ, this is absolutely horrifying and dystopian. I typed my name and birth town and country into Chat GPT, and ask if it knew anything about me, and he knows my age and where I study. And when I asked it about my Reddit profile (not this one), he know about the kinds of political opinions I associated with. How and why? Why is this even legal? If a fucking future communist government can figure out my anti-communist political leanings through fucking GhatGPT spying on my Reddit account that is anonymous, I don't know what to do.

I genuinely can't articulate how scary I find this. I asked Deep Seak and it refused to tell anything on the basis of privacy protection. How does a Chinese program care more about my privacy than an American one? I feel like I live in a Black Mirror episode. This shit is unbelievably scary. This is not normal.

What is with this they won't let me shit? The last time I checked even when you're married you're still in charge of you, no one else. So wtf do you mean they wont let you go somewhere?? they wont let you wear something??? Who tf is okay with that? I'm not saying you should ignore your partners feelings, i am saying there is a clear difference between stating you don't like something that your partner is doing and talking about it, and outright stating that they are not allowed to. Just read a post about a guy whose gf wont let him go fishing this week because he went last week. WTF DO YOU MEAN???? He is a whole grown ass man?????? To me just seems controlling af. That's all, y'all have a good day.

So I saw A Minecraft Movie yesterday, and even though the theater experience was fun and chaotic, I personally thought the film was absolutely terrible. It's a film that is definitely targeted towards children, but treats children as if they were stupid. Now, if you liked it and saw something I didn't, thats great. That's not what this post is about. But I've noticed a trend in recent years when a movie like Minecraft, or The Super Mario Bros. Movie, or Moana 2 releases and gets negative feedback due to a lazy story or bad writing, there's a subsect of people who will say something along the lines of

"It's a movie that's made for kids, why did you expect a good story?"

This is a stupid ass argument. Some of the greatest films of all time have been movies made for children. The work of Studio Ghibli, Pixar, hell even in recent years we've had films like The Wild Robot, Flow, Puss in Boots The Last Wish, Spider-Verse, etc; no one says these comments about any of these films. Thats because these are films that actively tried to tell a good story that is meaningful and fun. These movies tried. Roger Ebert has a quote, and correct me if I get the wording wrong, where he said "if a kids movie can only be enjoyed by children, then it's not a good kids movie".

I think this argument genuinely irks me for a wide variety of reasons, and they're almost all personal. I work with kids, movies have always been my passion, and debating is something I have a lot of interest in and deeply care about. This argument sucks in all three of these categories.

1) it treats children like they're stupid and can't handle films with any sort of subtlety. Kids are smarter than the majority give them credit for. They don't need every single thing spelled out, for the most part they'll be able to figure it out. It implies that children are too stupid for good movies so they need dumbed down slop. But again, there are children's movies that have stood the test of time and are universally beloved and remembered for being amazing for all ages, and show that children can handle more than a story that explains every single thing that happens.

2) This also implies that films don't need to try. We're in kind of a rough spot right now with blockbusters, there are some truly amazing ones, but so many are soulless, corporate, and just lazy. This kind of mentality does not push studios to make better movies, it's telling them that it's okay to be content with garbage. That they shouldn't try harder even though they have over 100 million dollars to make something worth paying money for. It just paves the way for more forgettable, meaningless garbage that only exists to profit off of an existing IP.

3) This is just a bad argument and doesn't work in really any capacity. It inadvertently agrees with the original argument that the story is bad, but tries to use it as a defense. It's like if I was to talk about a book with a friend, and I say "I thought the writing was pretty bad and kinda lazy" and they respond with "well it's a book for Teenage Girls, why did you expect it to have good writing? It's not made for you, just turn off your brain and have fun with it" ignoring the fact that good books for that audience exist, and just because it's made for an audience that you're not a part of doesn't excuse it from being poorly made. Along with this, the "turn off your brain and have fun with it" argument also doesn't work. If I don't have fun playing Basketball and someone tells me to just have fun while playing, i'm not gonna have fun. I like dumb fun movies. The Sonic films are a good example. They're dumb, but the characters are well written enough that I still care about what's going on in the story and I care what happens. I'm not going to ignore every problem a film has because "I'm supposed to be having fun"

I know this was a long ramble, and if you have fun with these kinds of films, that's genuinely awesome and I'm so happy for you. But the argument itself is lazy, doesn't encourage good conversation, and shows a lack of media literacy/acceptance for bad entertainment.

This used to make me genuinely angry but it’s gotten to the point where I’m just downright depressed. How did we get here? How did we get to the point where anyone who posts something online (especially a comment) with correct punctuation accompanying a decent set of vocabulary is automatically assumed to be AI? As if an actual human couldn’t possibly be capable of writing it? What the fuck?

I’ve noticed this concept has started to bleed into real life as well. I’ve had numerous interactions this year alone where someone has either been surprised, impressed, or annoyed with my ability to use “big words.” Since when is “disheartening” a big word?! People now think you’re pretentious or trying to “show off” when using synonyms that are a part of your everyday vocabulary.

I just wish I could type and speak how I want to/in a way I feel comfortable without others (occasionally) making a big deal out of it/accusing me of using AI.

My mom is a working class mother who I adore so much. We’re a family of second generation Puerto Rican immigrants. Her parents didn’t have much but always had the mentality of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps with the advantages you have for a better life. She works long, hard days and nights. Stressful but high-paying jobs (medical field) that leave her constantly exhausted but give her enough to feed her three kids. We’re not struggling by any means, and that’s all because of her, but we’re not super wealthy: needless to say, when she wants to take the family on vacation, it’s still a pretty big deal we have to budget around. After traveling halfway across the states, we made it to Orlando where we intended to spend most of our time at Disneyworld. I don’t know if you know anything about Disneyworld, but most of the food (aside from maybe the ice creams and pretzels) is notoriously low-quality and overpriced is beyond an understatement. When my mom realized this, I could just see the disappointment on her face. I even told her after she was unsatisfied with a meal, “No, Disney food leaves…much to be desired.” “But I thought…I thought because it was so expensive you’re getting, like, the best of the best.” I shrug. “Oh.” I hate seeing my mom upset, I really fucking do. Maybe I am sensitive, but that shit hurt me. My mom used to be really excited about Disney and Disney-affiliated trips, but now she’s adopted an attitude of indifference. Like I said, maybe it’s just me being sensitive, but I love my mom to death and I can’t stand her being so disappointed by something she worked so hard for.

Everything is slower than it was in 2006, when it should definitely be faster. Everything is littered with ads, demands that you sign in via Google, or shoving a privacy notice in your face as if you actually have a choice about "how we use your data." A lot of stuff is paywalled now, the stuff that isn't is AI-generated slop, scammy, or straight up propaganda. Search is terrible; if you type something in it will just show you what it wants you to buy based on something you might have looked up 6 months ago, even if it's totally unrelated. If you misspell the smallest word it acts like you are speaking a foreign language. Wikipedia is terrible with this too; you must be a perfect speller to find what you're looking for, in 25 years they can't be bothered with any kind of suggestion algorithm. Plus they're always hitting you up for money like they're running the site from under a bridge somewhere. If you have anything important to do your password will never work, even if you saved it in a manager. Then you will get an error message telling you to contact support, but there's no support to contact. Stuff like Canva is so bloated with unnecessary features it's unusable. Everybody wants you to use their chatbot but chatbots just spit out namby-pamby pollyanna crap that doesn't apply in the real world. They exist in an alternate vanilla dimension where everything works as intended and everybody is reasonable and calm. Even the user-generated content on YouTube/Tiktok is all desperate people trying to make a buck because there are no legitimate jobs. So there's no authenticity, and no consensus. You can watch videos on why everyone needs to hustle and grind to get ahead and then watch the same amount on why it's pointless and everyone should give up. There's no meaning and no point to using it anymore. I'm logging off now.

17 years total, 9 years since I left. He just won't stop. Cys has another case against him. It's an open ended case because he hasn't stopped. They are basically family at this point. I have made so many phone calls I'm surprised I still have ears. The amount of tears I have shed could create a new ocean. He told me that he would make sure I'd regret it for the rest of my life. I don't regret it. But I feel for my kids. I wish I knew I was giving birth surrounded by monsters. I was abused all my life, I didn't know any better. I'm tired. I'm exhausted. It feels like all the fight is gone. I will continue to fight but I feel so powerless.

I'm struggling. I'm struggling to be what is expected of me. I've gotten this far and I feel so defeated. Why do abusers get away with everything? When it takes an open ended cys investigation, 2 police stations, an domestic violence investigator, an entire school district, an entire therapy team to keep my kids safe, maybe it's time to acknowledge what I've been desperately saying this whole time. He's dangerous. And despite how hard I've been working with everyone to ensure they have a strong healthy support foundation and home built with love and safety. The affects of seeing him part time have done damage.

I'm so tired guys. And he won't stop. And everyone just let's him do it. He threatened to bash my kids face in, he told the cys lady to her face. Nothing was done. I'm disabled and chronically ill. I will run myself to bone to protect them if I must. But my God. I'm tired of being terrified. I'm tired of having to live in fear. Why doesn't he just stop abusing? How is being an abuser easier than saying Oh shit, I fucked up, get into therapy and just be a good dad, be a good person. Why is it easier to live in a home of violence, anger and eggshells than joy and laughter and peace and safety??

I was easy prey for him because my parents were abusers. The abuse cycle is real. Generational trauma is real. I have no mom or dad and honestly, I could use one right now. I'm scared, I'm tired and I feel defeated and I just wish I had a parent to run to. Someone to hug me tight and say I got you. You aren't alone. But I have to do to do this on my own. I'm almost 40. My kids deserve to be kids. It's like living in the twilight zone. It's like drowning in front of a boat full of people just watching me, as the shark circles us.

Why won't they save us from him?

By the word "Late", I mean after elementary school. The word itself is new, but the concept is as old as civilization, at least. Do parents not teach their children to think about how others feel with regard to their actions?

I see posts with people saying :

• "When I was posted to _______ as a soldier I started to wonder how the locals felt about me, and how I would feel in their shoes."
• "As a teenager it hit me that other people have friends, family, hopes, fears, hobbies, dreams, and emotions similar to mine or vastly different, but they all have them"
• "My son just came out as gay and I realized LGBTQ people are just the same as everyone else in all the ways that matter"

Yeah, I am happy that you realize you are not the center of all and that everyone you meet is a whole person with emotions, passions, thoughts, fears, dreams and all else, but what took you so long? Obviously it is better to discover the completeness of others sometime, rather than never, but why do we not learn this when we are learning how to lie?

If I can imagine that you are thinking in a certain way based on what I have seen you observe then why is it hard for me to realize your mind is part of a whole person? Theory of Mind is an ability most of us develop by age 5, (I feel bad for those who lack it), and which is essential for smooth social interaction.

Why then do so many adults cringe over the fact that someone has preferences, passions, interests, or tastes different from their own. I understand how difficult it is to comprehend some political differences, but those are usually in tension with the opinions of others and often based on different experience, education, and cultural influence. In our modern world of "alternate facts" it can be a sore challenge to understand the other.

But as far as simple likes, dislikes, interest, or preferences why is it hard to accept other views. Why on earth do people say things like:

• Men who drink milk give the ick
• I hate math and only wierdos like it.
• You're so stupid since you don't know _______________ (insert esoteric thing)
• Broccoli is disgusting and I can't understand why anyone eats it
• That (type of music) is horrible why do you like it?

I feel like this is more of an thing a lot of people do, but I see this constantly. Whether talking about the writing of a show or movie or game, game design, or other things like that (usually with entertainment, people are constantly acting like the thing they’re talking about is bad because of it. A show has a few problems with its writing or plot? The show is bad. A game has a couple undesirable mechanics? The game is bad. I think it’s a symptom of the kind of black-and-white, either toxically positive or toxically negative viewpoints the internet promotes, but please, before you make a final judgement, think about whether the thing you’re talking about is a net positive or a net negative.

I swear you have to make sure you have every single detail of a story, and even if you give some detail they make a fucking assumption about you anyway. It’s annoying as fuck. I honestly don’t even like posting on here most of the time because of the fucking pissing contest it continues to be every single time. It genuinely pisses me off. I bet people in the comments here will be nitpicky too you just can’t win. I know it’s the internet but something about reddit brings out the fucking pick me vibes or something. It’s genuinely annoying as fuck. You could make a post about how you have a plant that’s dying and mention something about a cat, for example, and everyone is just making it about the cat and not paying attention to the purpose of the original post. That’s just a random example BUT STILL. People on here seriously PISS ME OFF SO MUCH

I’m genuinely done with society. As a woman who’s been told they look average, people never respect me at all. Especially not men. Whenever I’m in a group with them for literally anything, even if it’s for LITERALLY WORK they never bother to look or talk to me, and even when I speak up, I get ignored. I thought it was just a them problem, but when a pretty girl walks over(no hate to them) they just become the nicest people. This has been a problem my entire life, just being constantly being ignored, disrespected, and overlooked. I’m literally invisible to them and not respected at all. I’m genuinely so fcking tired of this, if anyone has some advice, please let me know. And no, it is not because I am quiet. I smile and I am an amicable person, people pleaser at time but I am working on it. I am genuinely fcking tired of people saying men have it hard but women have it so much harder.

Does anyone else dislike someone so much that the sound of their voice makes you want to smash their face in?

That’s how I feel about my mom’s boyfriend. I hate the word hate but I’m truly getting close to hating him. I (24 F) let my mom move into my house while her house was being fixed. Her house was very old so they have been redoing almost everything, it’s taken about 7 or 8 months and they’ll finally be done at the end of this month. But while she’s been living here with me, after a month she let her bum ass boyfriend move in. TO MY HOUSE! Didn’t even ask me! He just showed up one day and she told me he needed a place to stay. This dude doesn’t have a job, doesn’t help me pay bills, makes a mess and doesn’t clean up after himself. He’s literally like 50 years old. Me and him have gotten into a few verbal exchanges and he always complains to my mom about how I’m disrespectful. I work 2 jobs and I’m a full time grad student, and he sits in my living room playing video games all fucking day! And the times we’ve gotten into it was because he said “I have to deal with a lot living with your dogs.” THE FUCKING AUDACITY!!! You’re lucky I’m even allowing you to stay here!

I love my mom but her choice in men is atrocious and I didn’t want to be rude so I didn’t bring it up at the time. But it truly pissed/pisses me off. I have 4 dogs who don’t really like men and it’s been hell with him here. I can’t let them roam like I used to because I’m nervous they may bite him (which atp I don’t give a fuck.) My entire routine is fucked and I only have to deal with this for a few more weeks but god damn! I wake up everyday annoyed, everytime I hear his voice I want to punch him, around month 3 I stopped talking to him fully, I literally act like he’s not there. And everytime I tried to talk to my mom she defends him like crazy so I just stopped talking about it.

I just needed to rant. Literally only have a few more weeks and I’ll have my house back to myself. It’s been a long 7 months and lately his existence has been on my last nerve even more than it already was.

I can still pop in any game in my gamecube and it works, no problem.

Yeah sometimes old consoles need parts replaced and stuff like that, but if your console is in working order, you can access the entirety of your games.

I was so excited when I finally got my hands on a copy of Splatoon on Wii U, years after its release and after it got a couple sequels, only to find out that much of the game content requires...playing online.
This really singles people out. I like encouraging online play, but the rewards should only take place online. I shouldn't feel like I'm missing out on large chunks of the game if I don't have good internet connection, or in my case, got it after the servers were shut down.

At least the story was playable. This phenomenon is getting worse.

I don't have an xBox, but I heard you need an internet connection to set them and their games up now?

What about when servers go down for those, huh? What, you want them all to just go in the landfills? Nice going, assholes.

I get it, game companies want us to buy new games. BUT I ALSO WANT TO KEEP PLAYING THE OLD ONES. YEAH I HAVE A SWITCH AND A PS5 BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I THREW MY N64 AWAY. Stop designing games to be...eventual garbage. Please! You are encouraging us to fill landfills even more! I really do still play all my old games!

What's with the switch 2 "game-key" cartridges coming out? This is the most garbage thing I've ever heard and I'm not buying them. What I BUY A CARTRIDGE and it's not even the game? Just my "right" to download it? Yet I still need to use the cartridge if I want to play it even though it's downloaded?

This is bullshit, I'm done. I want to play new games but I'm not buying anything that is going to be garbage when the servers eventually go down. If I ever have grandchildren I want them to be able to enjoy my game collection without issue. They shouldn't require internet or servers. I have consoles that are older than me and they still work. I have no intention of making the things I buy become garbage.

You can't describe any god damn situation ever with out some saying "you'll jinx it". I hate it.

"Its a nice day" " dont say that you'll jinx it"

"Its slow today" "dont say that, you'll jinx it"

Just. Everything. I can't say anything without SOMEONE saying "you'll jinx it".

And if it does happen, people say"shouldnt have said anything" but if it doesnt then there's silence. Just cause the possibility is there doesn't mean you speak ot into existence. Its so annoying. Hate how superstitious people are.

I had been using fingerprint and PIN since 4ish months now, due to excessive fingerprint combined with my stressed brain, I just forgot, like I have no memory of it. zero ziltch....you might think this a story of writing pwd down or backing your data. BUT THE REAL DEAL IS PEOPLE STRESS LITERALLY KILLS YOU. take care it's a rough world out there

Just went to the dollar store for the first time in a couple of years and was absolutely shocked at the pricing. Most of it is like going to the regular stores with only a few things at $1.25-1.50. The sodas were more expensive than Target! That’s literally their only appeal cause all of the stuff is old and the stores always look like a war zone. There’s no inexpensive/deals left in this world.

Just thought I’d put this out there to see if anyone else feels the same as I do.

In my generation, people are always talking about their fling and how they want something more and how the other is so selfish and blah blah blah and I just cannot stand seeing the words “What are we?” on an ig reel for another second.

And although I haven’t exactly experienced that kind of thing, I have experienced not being wanted countless of times, so I get the pain, but I stay away from the person because the thoughts piss me off and I don’t even want to hear that person’s name coming out of my mouth so nobody will hear jackshit about it. I know not everybody is the same, but bro, I feel like I’ll actually go insane if I see someone complaining about their complicated relationship one more damn time on the fucking internet and in real life. Obviously people can talk about it but I can never get away from the topic no matter how many times I stop those kinds of posts from getting into my feed or stay in quiet spaces.

I just wish that people could talk about love like the way it is, mutual and peaceful, and of course, genuine.

And that’s that.

Dear Fam,

As I sit down to write this letter to you both, I’m overwhelmed with emotions. For years, I’ve struggled to make sense of the pain and trauma that you inflicted upon me during my childhood. The abandonment issues that stemmed from your decision to send me away from home still linger to this day.

The loss of my father was devastating, but what hurt even more was the lack of emotional support and guidance from both of you mom and step dad during that difficult time. Instead, I was met with silence and further abandonment. Furthermore, the mo******n and abuse that I suffered at the hands of people within the family was enabled by your neglect and failure to protect me. Your absence and lack of intervention allowed these atrocities to continue, leaving me with scars that will take a lifetime to heal.

I remember the pain of being rejected and left behind, feeling like I wasn’t worthy enough to be part of this family.

Despite the pain and trauma I suffered, I made sure to give my little brother, all the love and care that he deserved. I tried to provide him with a sense of stability and normalcy, even though our home life was far from perfect. But instead of acknowledging and appreciating my efforts, you both chose to teach him to hate and resent me.

Throughout my relationship with R, I felt completely abandoned by both of you. You showed no concern or care for my well-being, even though you were aware of the pain and deception I suffered at his hands. Your absence and lack of emotional support during that difficult time only added to my feelings of isolation and desperation.

To whoever reads this, I hope someday you realize the weight of your actions and the hurtful legacy you’ve left behind. Until then, I choose to move on, focusing on surviving because you don’t want me to and rediscovering self-love because all you taught was Hate. Forgetting all of this pain and YOU seems to be the only key to my survival- one where I can finally find peace.

There is a commonly asked question of “What is the difference between a reason and an excuse?” The answer is whether or not the person you’re talking with accepts your answer.

I see it said all too often on Reddit, and experience it in the “real world” that people with disabilities use those disabilities to escape accountability or excuse shitty behavior. Some do that, sure. But frequently the issue is ableist people refusing to be accommodating.

Somebody was bitching about people who didn’t eat leftovers the other day. Called them “childish” and said they “need to grow up”. I’m autistic. I don’t eat the majority of leftovers. They taste bad and the texture goes off. It is a sensory nightmare. I got told I was using my mental illness as an excuse.

First of all fuckbag, it is a neurological disorder, not a mental illness. And even if it were, who the fuck cares? Are you paying my grocery bill? Fuck off. The constant insults of “Go eat your chicken tendies and ketchup” are fucking tired. They’re gross, dismissive, and cruel. And for what? Because people aren’t as adventurous about food as you??

“There are autistic people who eat leftovers!” And some people can play the harmonica. What do they have to do with me?

It’s one thing when a person actually makes their eating restrictions the problem of others. It’s another when you’re just unwilling to accept they don’t like what you like. I have so much food trauma from being forced to eat things I couldn’t tolerate + shitty diet culture I don’t even experience hunger anymore. I require medication to make me eat. And if I eat without it I get viciously nauseous.

If I’m asked where I want to eat I will never have an answer for you. It’s not because I’m putting labor on other people. It’s because I’m not fucking hungry. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to enjoy some company. People can decide where they want to go and I will look at the menu and see if there’s anything on it I can/am willing to eat. And sometimes, even if there is, I won’t get it…because I’m not hungry. I just want the company. I can always eat after if I want to.

But people make a big fucking deal about it because I am not adhering to a social norm.

The same thing happens with being offered food at someone’s house. It’s considered weird and rude to say no. Why?? That makes no sense. We’re not talking about a pre-planned meal here. We’re talking about snacks and drinks. If I say, “No, thank you” I get pressed about it. If I say, “I can’t eat that” I get pressed about it, and if I give them the reason “It’ll make me sick” suddenly I’m rude. They don’t believe me. I’m supposed to choke down something I find detestable to spare their feelings, and if I gag or vomit (as I told them would be the consequence) I am being “performative”. I can’t fucking win.

On the very rare occasions I have hosted something I tell people what I’m providing and if they would like something else or can’t eat something to please tell me so I can make adjustments. I make an effort to give people things they won’t refuse. It’s not hard. And if someone doesn’t eat? Oh well. My feelings aren’t hurt. It’s not a requirement they consume anything.

When it comes to social interaction I will factually never function the way people want me to. Yes, I can improve my skills, but there are limits. And some of those “improvements” aren’t improvements at all. They’re me masking, because my natural reactions are undesirable. And it’s more than “fake it til you make it”. It is mentally exhausting to try and behave the way neurotypical people do when much of the behavior makes no sense to me. There is no “making it”. What people want from me directly goes against how I function neurologically. I can’t change it.

I’m not talking about being an ass for the sake of being an ass. I’m talking about things like being asked a question, taking it at face value, and responding honestly (not “brutally”). I am expected to read between the lines every single goddamn time and I can’t. It is not an excuse. It is fundamentally how I exist. I say what I mean and mean what I say and there are still misunderstandings because people are looking for more meaning in my words when there is none. They end up feeling insulted not because of what I said, but because of what they think I said. And I get punished for it through things like loss of friendship.

Don’t have friends? Big red flag. I do have friends…but they’re pretty much all internet based. Maintaining in person friendships is almost impossible because at some point I will break an unwritten/unspoken rule, nobody will tell me, and I’ll get ghosted. That takes a toll on people.

It really seems like autism is viewed as a childhood ailment. People think the only autistic adults are people who are level 2/3. The ones who compulsively stim, have lower cognitive function, and overall fit the stereotypical “look” of autism. For people like me, people who still struggle immensely but don’t “look” autistic, our sensory and social needs are discounted as things we should have grown out of. They are things we should be willing and able to change.

They aren’t.

I still struggle to do things like shower because being wet is horrifically aversive to me. I had to modify the way I wash up to make it tolerable and be sure I’m clean. I have to modify the way I do a lot of things and that gets made fun of, too. I actually finished a full shower before this (had to wash my hair) and I do not feel better. I’m extremely agitated and overstimulated. Sometimes I’ll have a complete meltdown after washing up and cry because it was too much.

I had to cut some of my hair off a couple months ago. Not because I wanted to, but because wet hair touching my back was so upsetting I would bend to keep it off me and I was hurting myself. Or I’d avoid the shower completely.

I don’t get to function like others do. It’s not a choice. I’m not being stubborn, I’m not refusing to “better myself”, I’m not being difficult. I’m just trying to exist in a society that has made it clear it hates me.

It’s so alienating, and depressing, and lonely. All people have to do is not be complete dicks about certain things that don’t matter (like declining food), but more emphasis is put on maintaining rigid social rules.

Why is it so goddamn much to ask that people be a little understanding/accommodating?

I'm a woman and I like to go inline skating (Rollerblading) for fun and exercise but it attracts so much negative attention like catcalling and people honking at me from their cars. I get that it's not something you see all the time (at least where I live) and people are obviously going to pay more attention when you're doing something "unusual" but I don't understand why they need to be so obnoxious.

I don't typically get harassed excessively in public and usually can't relate to the sentiment of wanting to be left alone by strangers (if anything, I usually want people to interact with me). But as soon as I put on my skates it's like people want to be as annoying as possible.

I could understand if I were skating on the road but I'm not, I skate on a paved path that a lot of people use for walking and biking, and I still people driving by shout or honk at me for no reason. Not that it should matter what I'm wearing but I'm not exactly a fashion plate when I skate (dorky helmet + gross gym clothes that I don't mind getting dirty or sweaty).

I love skating and I am willing to put up with most of the obstacles - situationally unware pedestrians who crowd the whole path, potholes, deadly chunks of gravel, tactile pavement - I actually don't mind most of these things because they force me to be mentally present. But I will never like it when some freak honks at me from their truck and startles me so that I almost fall.

What exactly is it that you want?