Life is beautiful. I love being alive. I love a deep breath of air. I love sliding into a warm bed or eating cold ice cream. I love feeling the wind on my face and the sand between my toes. I love myself. I love simply existing. Yet it could all be a lie. All of this, everything I’m existing could be a coma induced dream, a fantasy created to protect and contain my dying mind. I could already be dead and I’m just reliving my life, it feels like I’m existing it for the first time but I’m actually bleeding out in a car crash. It could be a virtual simulation far in the future, a game made to experience the past. It could be a hyper realistic dream. I’ve had dreams where I live whole lives, how do I know my life isn’t an extended dream. It could be a hallucinations that I’m experiencing while tripping balls, I could wake up and go to my stoner buddy and say “dude, I lived a whole life yesterday”. Everything that I have experienced could all be lie. The love I felt, the pain I’ve experienced, the food I’ve tasted and the sunsets I’ve seen. Life could be a million things and possibly nothing. I love being alive. So even if this life is fake or real, I’m going to cherish every moment of this being existence. I like life.

I hate timers on washing machines. My machine said 42 minutes left. I set another timer for 45 minutes to remind me to go upstairs. I get up there and the machine has 12 minutes left.

I feel like everyone under the sun, Americans and Non-Americans complain about how terrible the US is and how it’s just the most horrible country ever.

Here’s the thing, I do think that it’s important to criticize a country and discuss solutions. But that’s just it, most people who complain about how terrible the US is don’t have any and just say that we’re heading towards our own demise and, respectfully, if you think it’s that bad and think all these other countries are so much better, then leave.

I get that the US is not perfect and there are things we could improve on. But most people who complain about how terrible the US is are (not all but most), quite frankly, very privileged Americans who have an idealized view of what the rest of the world is like. A lot of them are middle class Americans who compare the US to a third world country or a Dystopia. I’m sorry but that to me speaks to how privileged you are if you think your life would be better in an actual third-world country than in the US. Again, I am well aware that the US is not perfect, or even close, and that there are countries who probably are doing things better than us.

We’re not a third world country because we don’t already have thousands of years worth of heritage like many other countries do.

We aren’t a third world country just because we have an obesity problem. In fact, that’s very much a first world country problem.

We aren’t a third world country because we have rich people. Every country has rich people.

We aren’t a third world country because our food is not as authentic as food in other countries.

Yes, those are all ones I’ve heard.

I just needed to get this off my chest because sometimes I am surrounded by people who hate my country. I am tired of being the only person in some rooms who is not allowed to say they are happy about where they came from while everyone else gets to be extremely prideful in where they came from. And I’m tired of people implying that there is some inherent sin in being American.

Now I get why short form content has devolved into brainless slop and why people continue to post it, but HOLY SHIT am I tired of scrolling to an "informative" video about an interesting or niche topic but then all of a sudden the stupid AI generated script and voiceover just start taking detours and avoiding the original question without even answering it. I get why but please can we NOT? At this point I should just google the answer before the video starts as it would be faster and actually (probably) give me true information??? I'll give an example: I got a few shorts on "why aren't all bullets sharp?" and the video starts off pretty simple - introduce the topic, say a few arguments and then expand on it, but NOOOOOO ohhh we have to reach the 1 minute mark in case our 3000 viewers watch till the end so we can make 1 cent by just posting a mostly empty video. Seriously this is how it feels to watch any type of "informative" channel with videos under 5 minutes, just a big, lazily crafted concoction of NOTHING with a side of NOTHING and a drink of NOTHING. And not to mention the two unskippable 15 second ads. Seriously fuck all of you and fuck whoever approves of this and keeps endorsing it as it has become SUCH a widely used recipe for making videos. Honestly I'm more ok with clickbait, at least back then the video had SOMETHING to do with the thumbnail and title, at least it had a HUMAN behind it so we would at least know the person's motivations for posting this. Fuck this souless empty content

I am blind myself, and I am surprised to find out that people are not focusing on making self driving cars for blind people or kids. Tesla can make self driving cars, but why not for people with driving disabilities? Now, of course, I could be wrong, and somebody could be working on a car for people with driving disabilities, or there is a car like that around, but I have never heard of a single car made for this purpose.

Ugh, shirts! Ordered two size M Classic Fits. One from a no-name brand? Perfect. The more expensive Polo Ralph Lauren one? Sleeves are a ridiculous 1.5 inches shorter! Seriously, Polo?! Same size, drastically different fit! So much for trusting a "premium" brand. The no-name brand got it right, but thanks for nothing, Polo Ralph Lauren! Just another reminder of inconsistent sizing and wasted money. Rant over.
Same size, different fit.

Every week I see a post about in a drama subreddit how someone's husband/fiancé/boyfriend asked them for permission to DNA test their kid and make sure it's really his and how offended they are.

They will say something like "I have never even so much looked at a man ever since dating my husband much less had physical relationships. To be sure I am not tempted I have taken to wearing blindfolds whenever I leave the house. I have killed multiple people in driving accidents but its all worth it to make hubby happy. Should I leave him?" I am exaggerating for effect but sadly not a lot.

The post will get a lot of popularity and people will say to leave etc etc. Why does this annoy me? Because the post is fake. Yes, all of them. Want to know how I know? BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED PERMISSION FROM YOUR SPOUSE TO DO A DNA TEST ON YOUR CHILD. And yet despite this people keep falling for it. I don't think if you have your stupid, I just think you have never done a DNA/ancestry test before.

I know most posts on drama subreddits are fake but can they at least be believable? I know now that I have made this post they are just going to change it from the husband asking permission to the wife finding out from seeing the test in the mail or something like that but at least its in the realm of possibility. I am tired of seeing the same obviously fake story over and over and over.

I was 14 at the start of the year, and I weighed only 47.2kg—skinny, weak. I hated it. Every time I looked at myself, I hated how I looked. I’d look at guys like David Laid, all strong and shredded, and think, "Why can’t that be me?" I knew I didn’t want to stay like this forever. So, I set a goal of 60kg by the end of the year. I was gonna bulk up, get stronger, was not gonna be that skinny kid anymore. For three months straight, I worked harder than ever. I pushed myself beyond anything I thought I could do. Push-ups, squats, lunges, crunches, planks—whatever it took to get bigger. I spent all my lunch money and savings on protein, meals, and snacks. I quit gaming, spent less time studying, and spent all of my free time training. I didn’t even care if I wasn’t hungry; I forced myself to eat. I tracked every calorie. I weighed myself every day. I researched everything—muscle gain, supplements, exercise techniques. Gradually, the scale started moving: 48kg, 49kg, 50.1kg. I was getting somewhere. I wasn’t huge yet, but I was finally stronger. I felt proud of my body. My abs started showing, and my arms and legs were thicker and fuller. I was finally starting to look like the person I wanted to be. And then, all of a sudden, it all came crashing down. It started with a sore throat, blood in my phlegm, and a little muscle ache. I thought it was just a cold and nothing too serious. But then it hit me like a truck—on day 3, I had a 39°C fever, body aches so bad it felt like I was being crushed, and diarrhoea every single day. I was getting weaker and drained, and by Day 7, I couldn’t even eat much without throwing up. I couldn’t sleep from the constant coughing. I couldn’t even lie down without feeling like my lungs would collapse. By Day 8, I had difficulty breathing, and my body was completely spent. I went to the clinic. The tests came back, and they told me—pneumonia. One of my lungs was infected. All that effort, all those sacrifices, went up in flames. I went from grinding every day to lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to machines. The next week was hell—pain, exhaustion, uncontrollable coughing. When I finally weighed myself again, I weighed 46.2kg. I’d lost 4kg in just one week. FOUR KILOS. All that muscle I built? Poof. All the effort, all the sweat, all the sacrifices—it was all wiped out in two weeks. I didn’t deserve this. I didn’t ask for this. I invested everything—my time, focus, grades, money—and it was all taken away in a week. It felt like I was robbed. I was crushed. I was back at square one, but even worse. I was weaker than I’d ever been. I’d lost everything I worked for, everything I poured myself into. Three months of grinding, all wasted. I felt like I was back to being that weak, skinny kid I hated. 

(For those who use pounds, 4kg is about 8.8 pounds—almost 9 pounds of muscle, gone in an instant.)

My friend went MIA on me and the last text I got from her was that her parents are searching her room for any devices left and she is planning to stay with her grandparent's

A lot of my friends online tell me that my friend is scammer and I should cut contact but I don't think she's a scammer, I've known her for close to 6 months now and she hasn't asked me for anything, we've video called before so I know she is a real person but my friends online keep telling me that "Did the audio match up with the lip movement? it could be AI" or "It's a honeypot scam, they are just fattening you up."

6 months and no signs of a scam, besides would a scammer really go as far as to create stupid inside jokes, cry over an ex boyfriend or be friends with me for 6 months for a payday? I don't think so

I see her as a good friend of mine and Im very concerned about what happened to her

My skin is VERY greasy and VERY sensitive, lately for God knows what reason it had gotten super dry-I was literally losing v small pieces of skin from my forehead and t area-and it burned a lot when I tried to put anything on it. Serum, a toner, a cleanser… everything. My bday is soon and since makeup doesn’t look right when your skin is in these conditions-also it was just painful and annoying-I got a facial cleanse. The whole time some things burned but they were scrubs (I had already gotten a facial at this place and it was just fine, a lil burn sure but nothing too painful and the redness immediately went away) so I thought it was normal. Now my whole face is filled with red spots. And shit BURNS. My forehead was fine yesterday but now the dryness is already back, both my cheeks are red, it burns and overall I just look so bad. I can’t even cover it with makeup anymore-yesterday I managed to do it, because the redness was bad but it wasn’t ALL over my face, still painful tho-bc when I try foundation or concealer it burns like hell. This is so similar to sunburn which I get a lot (I see a dermatologist twice a year). It reminds me of when I had gotten it all over my legs and could barely walk. Im already using a cream specifically for redness rn hoping it works. Jesus

I am a high school senior and have been (mostly all the time) feeling very overwhelmed and burnt out from being a "leader" and an "academically driven" student. (Also, REALLY sorry for how long this rant is).

For some additional context I am an upcoming First Gen College Student belonging to a (divorced) Asian immigrant household and I am a part of my school's ASB which is a small middle & high school (about 110 per class size) designed to help low-income and first gen students. Additionally, since we no longer have school buses, we take public transit to school, and my commute in particular is about an hour. One of the ways this school helps us become "competitive" to colleges is by forcing us to take AP classes rather than your standard English class for example. Because of being First Gen and Asian, naturally, I've been conditioned to excel in my grades and go to college and become a success or something, but as it appears, AP classes are not easy. Additionally, because I apparently like to torture myself, I joined ASB which has exponentially increased the amount of work I feel obligated to do.

My school is so small and is ran by our university (who seemingly just uses us for donors) and it does not operate the same ways as other schools since we are technically not a part of the school district and instead ran by the university. For example, we do not have the proper faculty to execute a Grad Nite. But somehow the Seniors in ASB (basically me and two other people out of fifteen) managed to get a Grad Nite planned and approved for the Senior Class. However, this also now meant we need to fundraise even more than what is usually fundraised for (basically just Prom).

Additionally, since we are a low-income school who does not have the means to create events for the student body, many of our fundraisers are supported by donors or donations. One fundraiser the senior class has upcoming is planning to sell food during the event, food that was usually supplied by a donation in other years. In short, the Senior Class' objective is to raise money for Grad Nite + Prom, and find donations for this event, which wouldn't be an issue if the other 80% of the Senior in ASB did something?? I and two other people have been CARRYING this entire sack of horse dung you call an ASB by outlining everything that needs to be done and "bossing" them around. We assigned FOUR people and gave them THREE MONTHS to find donors for our upcoming fundraiser (2 more weeks) and they have gotten NOTHING out of the four places they've contacted.

It's so frustrating because being in ASB this entire school year feels like working in a group project with NO ONE else contributing to the project, and on top of that I am supposed to keep straight As?? (AP Bio is lowk killing me). My sleep schedule has been OBLITERATED by the sheer amount of work I need to do (averaging about 3-4 hours of sleep...) and make up for other people?? And these same people have the audacity to complain about all the things we're doing?? (Side tangent, I think I might have some kind of undiagnosed ADHD that is screwing up my personal working habits and time management, but I'll figure that out later whenever I decide to see a psychologist LOL). Furthermore, the same sack of horse dung who have done absolutely nothing in ASB, yet complain, are flexing about how much free time they had to work on college applications and how stress free they are in their senior year, getting into top colleges...

This is probably wrong to think, but basing their performance in their "leadership position" and in our academic classes, how did YOU get in?? I'm not even mad that I didn't get accepted into any of my privates (Go Tritions), but I am appalled that these are the same people I work with getting into these schools??

People always say "work hard and you'll be rewarded" but how are the people that AREN'T working being rewarded better that people grinding their butts off??

It's really difficult to identify what emotions I have been feeling because I've been so emotionally drained from all the work that I have to do as a Senior especially since it didn't feel like I was rewarded for any of the work I put in. Like I already got accepted into my college, so is it even worth the effort anymore?? Hearing from my friends who started college this year, they have expressed how much time they have to do things outside of school and it sounds like an absolute dream right now and I want to hurry up and graduate so I can stop being trapped with the responsibilities that I feel obligated to take on.

But I really want Prom and Grad Nite to work because they're like my children, so is it really worth doing this all of this for an ungrateful student body and a lack of support from the other Seniors in ASB? (There's a lot more responsibilities I could've mentioned but this is already long, and I didn't want to make my biography LMAO).

If anyone has any advice or suggestion to make my life easier, I am VERY willing to listen :'D

I've been working with a very immature shift lead at work lately. He's been dating one of our co-workers. I wouldn't care if they were able to separate their work relationship from their personal relationship; but they can't.

Whenever they work together, they have to take their breaks together, and they always have to do so in their car. They take more breaks than is necessary. Every time there aren't any orders up on the screen, they are out in their car, even if it means leaving the store unstaffed.

His girlfriend never has to do any cleaning, dishes, or helping with the closing procedures. This, and their excessive "breaks," means more work at closing, and no one wants to work with him. I can see why now; the shift lead spends most of his down time making out with his girlfriend in their car instead of helping out with clean up. No one wants to be there at 1 am doing dishes!

Well, recently, the store manager had enough when they both didn't show up for their shift. He almost got fired on the spot but was given a last chance.

Today, all of us drivers returned at the same time to hear him say; "I might lose my job because someone said something to [the boss]!" Then his girlfriend says, "I quit" and runs out of the store with him chasing after her. It was a sight to behold! I pretended to be busy with dishes so nobody could see me laughing at the high school drama club performance they were putting on for all the customers walking by out front.

He would rather accuse one of us for getting him fired rather than look at his own actions and admit his behavior is to blame. One statement to the boss isn't what put his job on the line; it was his constant shitty attitude.

Oh, and these are grown ass adults in their 30s. I've worked with high schoolers who are more mature than these two.

I had a childhood of uncertainty. I crave stability. I haven't becom jaded.

My choices in my adult life have been a mix of " be like water" and "well, shit. Do it now or never"

I was hurt tonight. I don't blame her for the choice. She has autonomy I am no one's keeper.

But God damn. Don't make out with a dude at my work infront of my friends.

Sure, I understand we wouldn't have worked out in the long run. She is more focused and accomplished.

Im all heart, humor and no accomplishments that look good on linked in.

She sought me out in the beginning so I assumed she was ok with who I am.

Ahhhh fuck. Whatever. She came to my restaurant. And started making out with the owners, girlfriends brother.

Right infront of me.

We had a few dates and I assumed we were on the same level.

I'm a fool. I'm too hopeful

You pay for the over priced hotel to gain access to the park 1hr before it opens to the general public. You enter to find that 90% of the rides aren’t open until the general opening time. It could just be a UK thing as we used to getting screwed over. Billing your stay as having early opening access is totally misleading.

We are just supposed to work. 5 days a week. 2 days to recover. Just go to college at 18, graduate, then grind until 80 years old. I always been confused on which career to choose. For the longest time I always wanted to do social work. There are a variety of things I feel like I can genuinely help people with. In middle school, I was that rebellious kid and a social worker helped me. So I would love to help kids. I have ADHD, so I wanted to work with the regional center to advocate and give resources to those with developmental disabilities. Yet, I talked myself out of it every time for the longest time, I always doubted myself. I thought I would be overworked, burnt out or overwhelmed constantly listening to people's problems. Friends would talk me out of it constantly, saying I won't get paid enough, this and that. I can't see myself doing any other career. The trades are way too much physical work and it seems like it takes a toll mentally and physically,, sales is stressful as hell you may not get paid at a very much at all, generally feels like a gamble, nursing requires you to go to college for 2-4 years and pass nursing school which is extremely difficult, plus not to mention being in a hospital all day or night dealing with patients and all the fucking stress or even possible PTSD, engineering requires so much insane math, most difficult major ever, lawyer or doctor requires you to be in college for like 7 years. The sickening thing is, I also see a lot of people with college degrees struggling to find a job, that is insane to me. One of my friends got her master in user interface and gave up on finding a job after graduation. And even if you do pick a career, you are stuck with so much fucking stress. The norm is also, having a kid. You basically have no time to your self and that sounds insane to me. For the longest time I worked at Trader Joe's because it was chill, fun and a great way to make friends. I was always interested in bartending but I find it extremely difficult to get into. Like I tried to hard to get into bartending. Why is that job so hard to get? Maybe it's the job market, but I applied constantly for host, server, positions couldn't find any. Anyways, if I am going to work, I may as well enjoy what I am doing. And to me I would prefer the "fun" job over all of those careers. If someone gave me a few million dollars, I would love to just not work at all. I would totally be fine with sitting my ass on the couch and watching YouTube all day. Or doing whatever the hell I want to do with my existence.

I hate my mind. I thought it was a thing. It wasn't. I gotta stop pretending life will be good

Like, I’m stating an opinion and everyone has to attack me by projecting their negative opinions and feelings on me. Why?

Like, just because you had no friends gives you no right to project your fucking life on me! Go watch Fox News if you want “realistic” stories!

Me and my much older cousin—I’ve been no-contact with since I was 12 because he’s genuinely a pos and honestly I don’t feel like I even know the guy. When I was 10, he got with this woman who had 2 kids of her own. One of them was this horrible boy only a few years younger than me. He wasn’t “just being a young boy” or “misunderstood” like my family members often claimed because they had no interest in making him take accountability—he was straight up abusive and knew right from wrong.

He mistreated me a lot for being disabled, especially calling me the r word and he always picked on me badly to get reactions from me—but then I’d be the one in trouble each time. He killed animals, said and did lots of disturbing things, always got in trouble at his school, physically abused his younger sister all the time and threatened to break my arm ON VIDEO but when I showed my folks they did not care at all—especially my older cousin.

He never cared about any of the crap his step son was doing or bothered to talk to him about it—his wife was just as bad, she was very mean and rude at every gathering and it’s no wonder where that boy learned these behaviors—and of course she never disciplined him—Ma’am your “innocent little boy who likes to fingerpaint” is probably going to end up in prison one day for the things he’s threatened to to do me or even murder..

I had to put up with that bs for nearly 2 years before my cousin and his wife eventually split up. I never got an apology from him and of course our entire family always took his side, but they don’t know I’ve gone no-contact and it’s best I keep it that way. They’d be really angry with me and tell me I’m overreacting. I just have no energy or time to put up with this—But now my cousin is getting remarried soon to a different woman on the 4th of July and my aunt won’t stop demanding me and my parents to come.

We already actually had plans for the 4th way before the news of the wedding and even though I keep telling her that, she doesn’t understand. Eventually she’ll put 2 and 2 together that I have no care for my supposed cousin and that I don’t wish to be in his life—she’ll tell our entire family and everything will get crazy from there. The only people who know I don’t want anything more to do with him are my parents, they’ve been knowing that and they support me. I’ve been stressing and annoyed for weeks.

Congratulations scalpers you did it. For all the bullshit you've been pulling and making the game damn near impossible to enjoy without breaking my fucking wallet you've now made it so I could no longer find love and joy in collecting pokemon cards. Yesterday I grabbed my binder of cards I've collected since 2020 and sold them. The only cards I kept were my suicune, entei, and raikou. It was the saddest fucking thing. You've ruined my dream of reliving my childhood and not just just that you've ruined the chances of actual kids being able to start their our dreams of collecting. One of the shops I went to to try and sell my cards had a bunch of guys and their kids there. One of the dad's told their kids to pick out a box so they did and they chose some japanese etb. I thought ok well shit atleast these kids have a chance to enjoy something I no longer could but no cause it turns out these dad's are fucking scalpers and as soon as their kids pulled a chase card these fucks already looked up the price and asked the store owner how much he'll give them for it. Of course the kids are oblivious to it but that's the whole fucking point!!! Kids don't give a shit about making a profit they just want to collect and cherish the cards they really like. And that's what I wanted to do. Collect and cherish the cards I like. But no I can't anymore cause you fucking vile ass piece of shit dream crushing chuckle fucks ruined the game. Fuck you and fuck all your dreams. I hope everything you sell is at a fucking loss. Fuck you!!!@!!

My family relies on me for a lot of things. They say I’m the “logical” one and constantly compare me to my older sister who doesn’t work. I am especially close to my grandparents and have helped them with many things. I am the one in the family who spends the most time with them. Well my grandpa has been sick. Tonight he went to the hospital because he was so weak he couldn’t move. I went up to see him with my fiancé. My parents were there as well as my grandma. Only 2 people allowed at a time in the room with him. My grandma and I were with him until my mom called and told me to switch out with her, so I did. I thought she wanted my dad, fiance and I to go home for the night so we all three did.

Then she called and asked where we went. I said we went home. She told me my grandma was tired and wanted a ride home, so I said I’d come up and give her a ride home. She said nevermind, she would, since she is the only one “there for them”. She said that in front of my grandparents. I wasn’t going to argue and start drama with her in front of my grandparents. Later my grandma called and asked if I would want to spend the night tonight. This is where I feel guilty. I did not want to, and already had plans tomorrow with it being my weekend off, so I told her I would think about it. I said that I would maybe come over late if she was still awake so I wouldn’t just be sneaking in. She said ok.

I was at my fiancés house after that. My dad called and asked where I was. Then he said “aren’t you supposed to be spending the night with them?” And was upset with me for not being there. Later, I was back home. My mom bursts into the room and asks me “what the hell is wrong with you ? We expected one thing out of you and you weren’t there. You are so selfish and all you care about is spending time with _ (my fiancé). We thought we could depend on you. You’re your grandpa’s girl and you really let us down tonight. You’re an awful person.”

Because of what? I may be wrong for this, but for ONCE in my life I would like to stand up for myself. I AM ME. I have done a lot for them and they know it. I would have driven my grandma home but my mom did to make me feel guilty for leaving. And now is NOT the time to be starting this when my grandpa could be dying. He has been sick the last couple weeks but now they are suspecting it has something to do with the cancer he has had.. It’s just not the time for this shit. Oh and my sister never showed up to check on him. But I am the only one they expect anything out of. I am so mad I just want to leave everyone.

End of rant.

I’ve read quite a few posts that think ghosting is acceptable and you don’t owe anyone an explanation as to why you don’t like them. I disagree with that sentiment. Tell someone why you don’t think things will workout. Does it suck? Will some people not take it well? Well, making the decision to never talk to someone or see them ever again is an interesting decision that I think deserves an explanation. Did you get the ick? Do I not look like you expected? Did I say something wrong or is there some sort of incompatibility? The other party is putting in time and effort, and it’s completely ignored by the ghoster. My time and energy is just as valuable as yours, grow up, be respectful, communicate.

This is specifically relating to fictional art not, like a blues song or a poem about the loss of loved ones. I keep seeing people talk about how AI is going to take the humanity out of all art, tv, movies, music, shows etc, but I simply just don't care about 90% of it. The reason AI is shit right now is because it creates a shit product. If in 10 years it can create a fantasy story with a coherent and compelling narrative I actually don't give a fuck if it was created by a human or not. Same goes for a video game or a top 100 summer bop. I'd go as far to say as the amount of "soul" put into tons of INCREDIBLY popular current human made media and AI is already the same at exactly zero. Milf Manor is a WILDLY popular show and I promise there is absolutely no human soul put into anything in that show. Same goes for every isekai with the exact same plot as the other. They are simply money making machines. I guess my point is that for stuff that actually requires a human to make it and gets it's power from the fact that it was made by a human who felt things, there will always be a market for real humans to make those things because people want to connect with another person when consuming them. But when it comes to generic content that is consumed en masse so you can have it on the TV while you are scrolling TikTok it's functionally no different from the slop already being made by humans.

So pretty much for my 20 years of life I have lived to be a nice person. I know that might sound egotistical but its true. I always try to do what's rights and be nice to others since there is no point in being mean

If someone needs to borrow something i say yes, if someone needs help moving i say yes, someone needs a ride i say yes, if someone needs advice i say yes, ect I put everything down to help them and do the right thing

But as time has gone on it gets more tiring. Like tomorrow i have a friend who is a fire fighter doing a free pancakes morning im going to, It goes from 9am to 1pm and i was going to get up at 11am to go support him. But now 2 friends of his and mine found out they need a ride ( one has yet to get is license even tho they has been able to for a LONG while now and the other just cant use the family car that day since there parents need it ) so i with out thinking have offered to give them both a ride but now have to get up at 9am to pick them both up at 10am

which means i have to go to bed earlier and which means less time i can stay up watching the shows i want to watch which i know is petty but its whats going threw my mind

thats just a small example but there is other stuff like 2 weeks ago my friend and there brother saying there getting paid to help clean out an office building basement for a family friend and offered to cut me in. I spent from 2pm to 10pm doing a little more then 1/3 of the hard work for 100 bucks in the end which yes is nice but i hated, i left legit sneezing dust, sore, and tired more so then my fucking factory job. But i didnt complain because im a nice person

hell its even gotten into toxic relationships where i let myself be mentally abused for to long and why? because i was being a nice person

not to mention all these family gathers where my family says the most bullshit redneck stuff, passive aggressive stuff, or just puts this pressure for me to find love and have a kid even tho im 20. Yet i cant complain because IM NICE and saying anything would change that

thats all just a few examples of the top of my head from recent times but there's tons more

its just so tiring and i feel like a petty and bad person for it

is it wrong to wish that i didn't have one day where i can be the selfish one where people drop what ever there doing to be nice to me with no complaints or passive aggressive comments?