I understand that receiving medical advice from reddit is a huge risk.

That being said, I don't know of many places for alcoholics to get first-person, informed, relatable advice other than this forum. So many times I've wondered "Is [insert symptom] normal from drinking?" and googled it and get nothing. Medical websites are useless, and otherwise you just get a bunch of addiction recovery "resources" that are boilerplate and commercial. But when I ask on here, I'll get a bunch of relatable responses from people like, "yeah, happened to me too! make sure you take a lot of vitamin B." or something like that and it's really helpful.

In other words, where does "medical advise" in the medical-professional sense end, and someone just asking for relatable experiences through a medical situation begin?

Has anyone ever went to their local liquor store and said “please don’t serve me anymore I’m trying to get sober”

I have been thinking of doing so since I live in a small town and there’s only one liquor store who as you can guess know me pretty well.

Basically had two cans, before you know it I've a litre bottle of cider and two naggin of vodka.. What isn't clicking with me that this is what I am.. Posted briefly on snap I'm an alcoholic anorexic.. Messaged my old high school how they treated me.. Ffs

I'll go first even though it's probably not that bad! I have a remote cottage that's hard to access, with all of the constant maintenance and major reconstruction projects it requires pretty much full-time attention. I had a week of vacation and went up alone with the intention of putting in full, productive days and get a big head start for the season. Planned everything out on paper and spent an entire day loading up materials in and on top of my van, transfered everything into my boat, then 7 slow chugging miles across the lake. 150 feet up 50 stairs then up the path to it's destination. Beer time! Poured a beer but had a double vodka oj that I chugged while my beer was settling. Had a nice dinner by my fireplace and drank a bottle of wine while intermittently slamming back vodka mixers when "needed." Woke up at 3am in a panic and had another one to get back to sleep. Woke up at 9 and was already behind schedule, guilt got me out of bed and right to work. Kind of slower than ideal kind of day but still productive enough and at 3pm called it a day. 3:30 was about as late as I could wait so, rinse repeat drinking patterns and by 6 I was lit. Barely scraped dinner together and ate it in front of the tv! Woke up an hour later with alfredo pasta all over my lap, recliner and some on the floor. Drink time and clean up, got a second wind and drank until I blacked out. Woke up at 3am again but sideways in my chair. Stiff drink to get back to bed and now it's 11am. Got out of bed and wandered around trying to get my head together. Dove in the lake and chugged my coffee. Dragged my groggy self to my tools and made a few measurements and cuts, but the overwhelming shame got me and I couldn't keep going. Lied to myself that a small shot would wake me up and suppress those feelings. It worked, so I kept drinking, woke up at 7:30pm thinking it was the next day and I was pissed to find out it was still today. Drank until I passed out and then proceeded to drink myself stupid for 5 straight days. Now it was a cycle between being passed out, then drinking until I pass out again! Barely ate another meal even though I had planned my indulgent menu out quite well. By the end of the week I had accomplished nothing, I left in failure with the worst hangover and black clouds of remorse washing over me for days. 2 months sober and I'm out of bed at 5am everyday with a feeling of calmness and peace, mixed with a renewed sense of purpose and hope! Wishing everyone here all of the best on your journey to where you want to be!

This time was a doozy, but obviously ultimately worth it.

I decided to get sober one night and called a center I’ve been to before and trust. Bought a plane ticket for the next day, got on a 7am flight and they picked me up as soon as I landed.

I don’t remember the first three days, except 2 hallucinations 1) I swore there was a kitten in the toilet trying to escape and 2) there was a gaggle of babies crawling around under the bed, which I can laugh about I was slept or sedated the next two days.

The problem arose because in my state at the time of making this decision I neglected to tell anyone where I was going or what I was doing (I think? It’s very hazy but my dad was able to locate me so I don’t exactly know) and for 3 days most of my loved ones thought I was dead. And now I’m facing those consequences, which sucks.

I also had to stay longer because they had to use so many Benzos on me to taper off the alcohol, they then wanted to taper me off the Benzos. I get to leave tomorrow though.

I just needed to let it out and people who are still talking to me, don’t want to hear about this stuff. So thanks for letting me ramble.

After a few years of trying to battle it, it's coming back during a hard time. And the only moments I feel happy are when I've had a drink...Vicious cycle...

EDIT: And I am in one of those happy moments, but I guess something made me open my eyes somehow...

I was in withdrawl last week.. I was running up and down my back garden, If my neighbour looked out the window they'd assume I was on crack. I kept saying '' it's too much it's too much and oh my god a flash'' I ran up and down stairs, I was saying wow this room feels too strong. I was pacing up and down and honestly, had no idea what to do with myself screaming up and down the hall way. The ER thought I was also nuts. I kept saying I vibrate every morning, once my mum thought it was an earthquake.. I'm like a vibrator except I don't need duracel batteries.. I think the fact I find this hilarious does not help me in the long run. It wasn't at the time. I was throwing my hands in the air making a whoosh sound as if I wanted to take off

Hello All, I found this sub-Reddit and while reading a few posts I thought about sharing my experience. Please feel free to share your thoughts and suggestions. Since my teens years alcohol has always been part of my social routine. To the point that at this stage it is hard for me to imagine having fun or social time without it. This was always a social usage though. Confined to weekend or holiday time. Never drank during the workweek. Can easily do months and months without a single drink. Yet I struggle to have fun without it. The real problems started some years ago after a long holiday where I was essentially heavily drinking everyday. From there I started to feel for the first time withdrawal symptoms. Initially was the anxiety. But over recent years as I continuously went through boozy time off work and detox or long weekends my withdrawal symptoms became stronger and stronger. To the point when I had to go to a hospital and ask for help when auditory musical hallucinations were pretty much making me completely insane. Was treated with diazepam. Since then I genuinely thought I would have avoided alcohol forever, but it’s not possible. I need it have fun and to get the most out of those social moments. I gave myself rules like maximum three days in a row drinking and then closing myself in my room for 24 hours of intense withdrawal. I genuinely hate the whole concept behind benzodiazepines and I have a complete refusal to go through that emotional rollercoaster. I highly value my brain functioning and the only time I’ve been under benzos I felt my brain was simply not working. Lately I’ve been researching alternative medications to ease a bit withdrawal after 2 or 3 days of drinking but did not find a clear solution. I don’t consider myself an alcoholic, but I value alcohol as a social battery and I don’t want to give it up in those nights when I want to feel free and less serious. It seems to me that my withdrawal is actually a curse. Have many friends who drink similar amount together with me and don’t experience any withdrawal symptoms or maybe just mild anxiety, while 4 or 5 days of drinking can easily bring me to severe panic and hallucinations when stopping. Which also makes binges more likely as sometimes I am just scared of the anxiety and continue to drink making eventually the withdrawal even worse.

BEEN HERE FOR FUCKING WEEK NOTHING TO DO EXCEPT GO OUTSIDE 10 MINUTES AWAY TO HAVE A CIGARETTE FINGERS FROZEN NO TV NO NOTHING BUT GUESS WHAT GUYS!!! THEY GAVE ME SOME CROSSWORDS WITH CRAYONS LIVING THE LIFE PLUS THEY FUCKING GOT ME FUCKING DEPENDENT ON 100MG VALIUM A DAY STILL HAVENT SLEPT FOR A WEEK AND IF I DO SLEEP THEY KICK IN THE DOOR SHOVE 10 PILLS DOWN MY THROAT CHUCK AN IV IN MY ARM BUT DONT WORRY IT WILL ONLY TAKE 2 HOURS THEN WILL DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN BUT AT LEAST I GOT SOME CRAYONS FOR SOME CROSSWORDS WOO BABY

I am almost 28 and had to move in with my parents.Growing up Dad let me drink and gave me oxys ,mom gave me Xanax. Left after they kicked me out at 16. Recently mom got breast cancer and i had to move back in then shortly after Dad got in a work accident. Broke his back. Retired.but was prescribed oxys. We made him quit. But he wakes up at 5am every day to drink liquor. He knows I also have a problem. He knows I'm trying to get sober but he keeps offering.What do I do or say ?

Hey guys, I’m wondering if any of you have experience hallucinating about the person you live with?

Do you imagine them being meaner, angrier or abusive? Or possibly saying things that they are not even saying?

Asking because my wife is the alcoholic and I can’t understand why she thinks I’m … well, she accused me of being able to end her life in her sleep.

I felt euphoria, high, buzzing, happy, I didn't have to feel my brain firing. As a barely noticeable autistic and ocd, it was my absolute miracle substance.. Till it wasn't. It slowed and halted all my rumination, my grievances, my fears, the what if this happened in the past or what if that,

I always wondered why anyone bothered with any other substance, this one was all I ever cared for.

I'm going to miss it like it is almost someone close to me who died tragically.

I tell myself maybe I did it wrong, maybe I should of never ran out, had a emergency stash.. I feel like.. Empty now

Been in alanon and know I didn't cause it can't control it. I don't understand it and need to know from an addict what was in their head to process it.

We were married 10 years with kids and we were both sober. I stopped drinking to support her when I learned of her problem while dating. She did AA and fell off and seemed cured. I encouraged her to continue but couldnt work her program. But never seemed she would ever go back to it.

I never enabled when I learned of her relapse. Always in her face warning her and telling her I loved her and knew she could beat it. I didn't know that logic didn't work to at least influence someone you loved that they are unhealhy. SHe left marriage 2 months after I learned of her relapse. She had been abusive to me for a few months prior and I had no idea why and tried to talk to her about it and she took no accountability. Found out later she had hidden bottles, so she never shared with me her relapse and it was all secret. SHe never drank around me. She hid it in the bathroom and took naps. I hadn't a clue. Now I suspect all through marriage she likely lied and relapsed without me knowing when I look back to other "fights" or "abuse". But I have no idea, all she does is lie and she left me. Any secret perfectionist drinkers out there share if you have done this approach>?

She left marriage abruptly without conversation, started a smear campaign, manipulated her friends and family to turn on me and I was in shock thinking she had a mental breakdown. She was actually in bed with depression 2 days prior so I thought it was a psychosis. I had absolute faith and extreme hope she'd be back and bottom out and that love was stronger than addiction. She carried on like that for 6 months till she was evicted and then almost offed herself a few times and still wouldn't get treatment. She abandoned the children leaving me with them while previously she would inconsistently share custody. She then got into hard drugs and was on the streets. Who knows maybe was always on them. She burned through her friends and family and met new friends to scam and burned through them. Then she got sober and made very surface accountability but still denying things, still gaslighting no major amends.rhe refused inpatient treatment but did outpatient for a few weeks. Never once admitting to destroying everything and the marriage or me, never once trying to make "us" work again or her family. But I was ok with that if that's where her heart was as long as she was making progress and honest and safe for kids. I knew it would take time and not to be too needy with real amends so I waited. But she fell off again..

She stopped contacting the children for another few months. Only seeing them holidays and claiming she's sober I'm crazy. Then she came back again agressively wanting to talk to the kids daily and see them multiple times in the week . Claiming sober, but even more angry with me. New guy now she just met and she owes me nothing. No explanation. Not my business. She won't speak to me. We are still married. She hasn't even picked up the things in her place that I moved for her when she was evicted. Complete nonsensical chaos.

I suspect she is functional addict now. She can be more abusive as a functional addict than an out of control addict as she is able to fool everyone functional. She's able to endanger the children and she's able to gasllight more strategically. I really can't see how this anything less than a demon possession to completely lose every quality of the person I love and bring so much danger to herself and family and not give a shit. SHe is now threatening legal cases against me and is fighting for kids while unwilling to even have a conversation with me and has no desire to reestablish trust.

Anybody do anything like this? IS this drugs or can alcohol do this? Just 2 months ago she admitted to drinking a half gallon per day. Not sure if that's true. The guy she's with now who called me for help when he was detoxing her said he thought she was schizophrenic . I told him she is not. SHe needs to detox at the hospital and is probably on drugs. She was on fentanyl during this run and at that point when I saw her she seemed very clear headed and calm and appropriate with the kid. SHe can absolutely fool and manipulate anyone. She probably just schedules her drug alcohol use between comittments just like she drank in the bathroom hiding it from me.

I'm terrified for the kids and looking for answers. I also recently came to realization that if in active addiction she lied about absolutely everything why would I believe that when she said "i love you" that she was telling the truth there. All she did was abuse me.

How is it possible to feel like a victim for all this harm. Do you really feel like the people that love you most are the problem when you're using in active addiction causing all this harm and doing all this lying? Do you think by lying to the law and having no values anymore that you are the one that is the victim? I don't understand one bit

I have pulled punches, not filing anything legal on her having all the hope in the world she'd return to herself and bottom out. Now that she's making false claims and has only malice and hate for me the person that never stops believing and trying and loving and showing her grace I think now I have to strike back. She just hates me for telling the truth and loving her? How is this even possible?

Oh also all this drama is only about 1 year of absolute trainwreck close to death destruction

I have this friend that I have known since school. Not super close, but we hanged out from time to time. Last few years he has been sinking deeper and deeper into alcoholism. Lost his teaching job, lost front tooth due to poor oral hygiene, about to lose his flat because he can't keep up with rent. It's a shitshow.

When he gets drunk, he loves to call people and talk for hours. Boring drunk rambling, pointless really. At first I tried to talk some sense into him, help him out somehow, but it's useless. I often don't pick up my phone nowadays, but I feel bad for being a shit friend... I just can't deal with hearing the same themes over and over again.

Yeah... and he has started to ask me to lend him 10-30 eur sometimes. He has given it back so far, but I understand that it will change, so I have to put and end to loaning him money, it's stupid of me to even been doing that.

Have you ever been in such situation, how did you deal with it?

I've tried many substances but alcohol is always the easiest path to euphoria (other than opiates but those are boring) and has some of the strongest bliss under the right circumstances. Everywhere I look people call it horrible but I don't understand why.

Was also wondering did anyone else get nightmares getting sober I get them every night and I wake up in a panic or wake up and feel like I can't breathe I'm just hoping they go away because I'm starting to get scared to sleep

Most of the time when im alone at home drinking i beginn to cry, for some reason it leads to me even drinking more and i even enjoy it because sober me isnt able to cry. Its even almost to the point i look forward to it and release it all, the problem is i dont know exactly why i actually cry and in the end of a session i never find out the reason and the next day its forgotten anyways and i go on about my day.

I (33f) have an assessment next week and I’ll probably be told that I need to go to residential. What kind is things should I pack for a 30 day place?

I like to read, write, and draw. I’m wondering if I should bring things like that to kill time. Im not sure if I’ll be able to have my phone or not. But I’m not sure what is acceptable to bring, what I might need that I wouldn’t think about, or what is me just doing too much.

Anyone have ideas or past experiences to help me decide?

It’s so hard to quit drinking when my family’s been providing it for me since I was in middle school. I’m still not even legal in age. I’ve only recently admitted to myself that I have a problem, and now I don’t know what to do

Hi all,

I'm 37, male from London, UK. I've been struggling with alcohol for over 20 years and am writing this post for 2 reasons;

1. I have searched hard to find an account of what going through withdrawal at my level of drinking is going to be like (every day, morning til passing out, about 30-40 units per day solidly for 20 years).

2. To apply a degree of peer pressure to ensure that I stick to it.

I shall update daily and hope that I can provide a bit of insight into how it will hit physically and mentally.

It's a bloody awful thing and I'm so fed up with battling this every minute of every day. I've been given a massive reprieve in terms of work/relationships/family and I can't entertain the thought that I'm gonna piss it up the wall again.

I hope that this will help some people and also, on a selfish note, help myself.

Here we go...

Update: Day 1. Shakes are starting to hit but not too badly so far. A lot of mental fogginess and feeling jumpy and very anxious. A bit wobbly on my feet too but manageable. I know it'll get worse but my resolve is still at maximum.

I’m curious if anyone knows the psychology behind why some people can cut themselves off or limit themselves when consuming alcohol.

I’m in my mid-20s, grew up in a very small Midwest town where overdrinking was VERY normal. When I start drinking, I go until I don’t remember anything and without mixing in waters, eating, etc. I drink 2-3 beers in the first hour.

I’ve also noticed people my age who go to the bar and only have 3-4 beers in the night, drink a few waters, and at 10-11 p.m. go home. It’s almost like I drink the same way I did in college, and everyone else outgrew it, but me.

I would assume these people are also not waking up and having a Bloody Mary, then a few beers, and going about their days, as I would. When I’m hungover, my mind says “A few beers would be great”. This turns into a 4-5 day bender and then withdrawals for 2-3 days.

Moral of the story, is it that I lack impulse control? Maturity?

I’m sober for over a month, but I’m still curious.