I died and was revived after an attempt. I was forced into a psychiatric hospital for three months. All they did was medicate me until I agreed to everything. No therapy or life assistance. Just pills. I still want to die. I’m angry they brought me back.

Depression isn't a matter of love or lovelessness - sure, a lack of love can accelerate your depression, but depression is a state of mind. You can love yourself but still constantly feel like there's you're being sucked towards a void with nothing but hell screaming in the depths of your mind.

I also find people who preach for "self-love" often are individuals who have healthy backgrounds, loving parents, are financially stable or have been raised in a financially stable home, and have been dependent on healthy relationships for the entirety of their lives.

It's so frustrating and honestly, it makes me feel so alone how others don't understand that no matter how much self-improvement you invest you are still going to feel like there's no tomorrow.

Like do people actually enjoy their existence? It just feels like a foreign concept to me.

I want to sleep and not wake up......ever!

Life so sh!t, I have no family of my own, been short tempered with my bf so doubt he'll stick around much longer.

I want to go back to when I was young and innocent, before everyone got inside my head. Before the SH, suicidal thoughts and ideas, the bipolar/depression and so on.

I failed twice, but I don't want to fail a third, I want to know how to plan my leave and have it be permanent.

I cannot do this any more, it's too much, I'm sorry 😢

I've just destroyed my life beyond repair. I became such an intolerable reclusive loser that I lost all my friends, what personality I had has just completely rotted and fallen away. I've built no skills, no real knowledge, in fact i've done nothing but lose parts of myself for almost a decade.

At this point depression might actually be the only thing keeping me alive: if I suddenly became a normal person and had to look at my life unanesthetized I would be flying off a building in the time it'd take me to run to the top :o)

This shit is endless. No one is coming to help. It's going to be more and more meaningless pain forever.

30 years old and my entire adult life has been full of failures, struggles, and disappointments. No big deal, right? Happens to everyone.

What I noticed is a work my ass off and nothing ever changes. I always tried to power through the rainy days praying for sunshine. Now I want to give up. I have zero friends, no partner, no nothing.

I never caught my break that made the struggles worth it. Now I’m ready to give up, thinking of self annihilation, but still trying to stay strong. On my way to a meetup to try and make friends but in the back of my head I’m thinking what’s the point.

My therapist randomly ghosted me and when I tried to reach out to her office they told me she had dropped me as a client and gave no reason. Ever since, everything has gotten much worse. My family is driving me insane. No matter what I say, do or help, I’m still a burden. I’m constantly getting screamed at for anything and everything. I’ve felt so bad lately and have just been laying in bed rotting for over a week now. I feel like I have nobody to talk to and nothing that matters anymore. Everything feels so fake. Like I’m living in a fantasy that doesn’t matter. Yet somehow it’s still a nightmare. Idk what to do. I feel crazy.

I’m in the US and having a crisis. I’ve been sobbing in my car for 2 hours. & hyperventilating. Called the local mental health hotline and no one picked up. Should I go to a hospital? What would they do there? I need a way to stop feeling so hopeless. Can any quick medication do that? I want to feel better but don’t know how and it’s urgent. I’m afraid of what will happen if I don’t get help immediately. I want to disappear.

I'm so tired. Tired of life, tired of being in my own head, tired of feeling like a failure, tired of feeling hopeless, I'm just fucking tired. Normally I'm the happy go lucky one, the positive one, the strong one, but I'm just fucking tired. I don't know how to push through it this time.

And no, I'm not feeling suicidal or anything, I'm just tired of feeling so low.

They tell me that I am too young and that they feel sorry for me for suffering at such a young age. And I agree, I should enjoy my adolescence, not rot in bed, in my room... I'm missing classes because of this, my principal already knows what I have. no medicine in the world would help me, I fantasize about dying every day, every night... But I don't try, because I don't want to cause chaos in the family again, but every day, I wait for my death. I can't brush my teeth, I haven't brushed them for 2 weeks, I can't take a shower, I haven't taken one for a month, I can't wash my hair, I haven't washed it for 2 weeks... Right now, at this exact moment, I haven't showered in about 3 days, washed my hair in 5 days, and I think I haven't brushed my teeth in 4/5 days. The amount of pain I'm suffering is no joke. It's not just about being sad or crying... It's about rotting and stopping living and just surviving.I feel so extremely tired that I can't do anything, nothing!!! I want to kill myself, and I plan to, take a razor blade, very sharp, and cut my vein, bleed until I die :( I'm only 13, I shouldn't be suffering like this, no one should.

I have no friends, everyone at School treats me like shit and i am being made fun of constantly. My dream Job is being an Actor since Childhood but i never told because of fear of being made fun of even more. I have nobody to talk to

Ready for it to be over. You ever just get hit with it? Idk what or why. But I just want to sit here and cry and die. There's no point. Nothing matters. Who cares if there's a chance. More time spent being miserable than not, is not a chance. Hope isn't real. Just do it just be positive. I hate everything. I absolutely want to die.

I’m almost 40 feeling down in debt lost my job alone. Is life just basically working to pay off my debt then to die alone? It just seems like what’s the point.

I have rich parents who make sure I'm not homeless or unfed. I've been unemployed for most of the time I've been graduated, which has been over a year now. I was doing a lot better, building up my confidence and my optimism, even became spiritual again after a period of deep, deep nihilism. But just a couple days ago I came across a series of blog posts that triggered a rekindling of those feelings of nihilism and deep depression, anxiety, existential OCD, PTSD, so on. The blog posts were predictions for the near future, and seemed very reasonable. And hopeless.

On top of this, at this point in searching for a job I've realized that I'm too scared and neurotic to keep any job just about for more than a couple months. At the end of which I'll have a breakdown and just stop showing up. In my sage-like knowledge I prepared and applied to be a substitute teacher as a last resort-- which is funny because I'm terrified of returning to high school in any form. It's a place of deep trauma for me. But it seems like it's the only possibility in the extremely competitive market where I live-- and I'm not even certain they would hire me. I feel like I'm going to be unemployed forever, but not able to appreciate that my parents could fund that because I feel so guilty for being such a low life.

I started seriously considering ending it and just leaving behind a note that says for my parents to support my partners and make sure they don't end up starving or being on the street, just like they did me, so that my partners don't have to be so nervous about losing our living arrangement all the time. And to give them my possessions and inheritance. I feel like it would be a worthwhile trade-off. One useless layabout in exchange for saving several people from poverty.

I have no idea why but for some reason I can never have people in my life that I enjoy and also enjoy me back. It seems like every time I find someone I am really interested in they almost immediately start to forget I ever existed. I try to brush it off and say that maybe it’s just something that they are going through but it has happened consistently so many times over the years that I really start to wonder if I am just a terrible or boring person to be around. I can’t wrap my head around why I just can’t have people in my life that actually make me happy. Why is it the only people who continue to talk to me are the ones that don’t really make me happy. I’m just tired of losing over and over again and constantly being back at square one😔

I lost both of my parents by the age of 23, I'm an only child. I live alone, I eat alone, I do most of the things alone. My "friends" aren't there for me, all my relationships and interactions are superficial. I can't connect with anyone in a meaningful way. I hate where I'm at and I try my hardest to change my living situation. I'm going through extreme mood swings but the moment I'm honest about any of it, I'm told to be positive, by people who haven't experienced half of the things I've went through. Or they just tell me that's life and I have to accept it the way it is. I know that life is unfair, I'm the one living it, I have a better idea of how unfair and fucked up it is than them but it's just so funny how people are capable of normalizing or dismissing it when it's not their life. Most of the people saying these things to me break down and act as if the world has ended over such miniscule things.

I don't want to pity myself, I would kill to be positive. I try my best to improve my life and try to keep my head up but I'm scared, I'm scared of the history possibly repeating itself because yeah, not everything is under my control and I'm scared shitless of things not working out. I always assume the worst and panic like crazy, not because I want to but because it's what I'm used to, and these people just dismiss all my struggles and tell me to be positive. They still have their parents, none of them went through what I went through but they keep talking, they never listen, they never care. If they were in my shoes and I told them to be positive, they would throw a fit and tell me to fuck off but I'm just expected to smile and do as they say.

I lost everyone close to me. My job sucks. I can't have kids. I've just had it. When I get done walking in the rain I'm going to swallow a bottle of xoloft and trazodone just to see if it'll kill me so I don't have to do this anymore. I don't want to see my wife with someone else.

I'm Josh I'm 33 and I'm in pain because of all the abuse I went through. I was blamed for it and called crazy. I cry out to people but it doesn't help.

I dont know how to react to that, Im unable to do anything, I just isolate myself and sit in my bed and wait for the day to pass.

There's some stuff I could do but I cant bring myself to, Im supposed to go to the park n walk my dog with my dad later but just thinking about going outside and doing something makes me feel disgusting.

I just deserve to rot in my bed

I have been searching for a job for awhile and I’ve been tired. All I do is stay in bed and hope that I won’t stay here forever. I have friends I talk to but everyone is busy and we make time when we can. I feel jealous that people are going out and having a good time and I am at home lonely and depressed