r/Unexpected • u/A_MASSIVE_PERVERT • 1d ago

Toxic Relationship

[removed] — view removed post

77.8k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

315 comments sorted by

View all comments

3.0k

u/SuumCuique1011 1d ago

Would you rather that or he put his bare ass on your face?

519

u/No-Poem-9846 1d ago

Idk but is it teabagging if they are neutered and have no sack? What if they are neutered and have an empty - nvm 🤣

386

u/SuumCuique1011 1d ago

Neutered or not, a cat asshole on the face while you're sleeping is never a welcome surprise.

56

u/CoolVictory04 1d ago

Fr, once my cat was about to put her asshole on my mouth, thankfully I woke up just in time before she did it, why they do that omg

59

u/BobknobSA 1d ago

I have had 8 cats during my lifetime. Most of them would sleep in my bed. None have ever put their asshole on my face. What the hell?

38

u/CoolVictory04 1d ago

Why? Do you want it?

25

u/BobknobSA 1d ago

No thanks. I am good. I just didn't know it was common.

21

u/CoolVictory04 1d ago

You might've got one, while you were sleeping, who knows, they might even be freaky with you...

15

u/nrfx 1d ago

You should try the lipstick experiment to see if they're getting you in your sleep.

20

u/LuxNocte 1d ago

I thought you meant wear lipstick to bed, to see if it's covered in cat fur when you wake up. And through the power of delusion and reality denial, I still think that.

5

u/MsSupa 1d ago

Thank you for this, I love you!

3

u/_-_p 1d ago

Holy shit, what year is it?

4

u/nrfx 1d ago

2004

I'm honestly impressed I remembered and found the exact post I had in mind when I started typing it.

2

u/_-_p 21h ago

that takes me back. My favorite Fark memory is Scott Adams making fake accounts to call himself a genius

2

u/RedditEqualsBubble 1d ago

That you know of. Sneaky little bastards.

2

u/Unlucky-Tie8574 1d ago

That's what you think...

1

u/mazarax 1d ago

You probably have toxoplasmosis by now. They didn’t need to infect you again.